Grade my SAT Essay

Test Preparation SAT Preparation
1

<p>I'm starting to prepare for the SAT and would like some feedback on my SAT essay. This site looked like a great place to help me improve my essay so please, don't hold back any tips, advice, or criticisms!</p>

<p>Prompt:
Is it important to question the ideas and decisions of people in positions of authority?</p>

<p>My response:
Social status often blinds people of the fact that everyone, no matter the power he may hold, is human. And as a human, he is prone to making mistakes. Thus, it is imperitive for those who are led to challenge, question, and scrutinize people in positions of authority.</p>

<p>As a high school student, I personally bear witness to my teachers' mistakes. Students are expected to revere their teacher and their teacher's instructions. They are examples of leadership, often directing classrooms of greater than 20 students many times throughout the day. And yet, these authority figures can blunder. It is not a rare event that a teacher will misplace his student's test or homework, miss an incorrect answer on his student's test, or even arrive late to class. In the end, they are not exempt from mistakes.</p>

<p>Teachers are an obvious example of authority requiring challenge, but in The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn, Huck experiences an even more influential authority figure fail him. Huck is physically abused by his father, a well-known drunk that any person would detest. However, despite his unfortunate scenario's infamy, he is forced to continue living with his father. The town judge was loathe to separate family, so Huck was stuck getting beaten to a pulp by his father. Since the judge's word was final and no one was in a position to disagree, Huck experienced a nightmare childhood from which the only escape was to fake his death and run away.</p>

<p>Huck was let down by the judge because the judge could not be challenged. Had the judge been open to question like the teachers in our schools, things may have turned out differently. Ultimately, no one is completely bereft of committing mistakes.</p>

2

<p>3/4</p>

<p>-some grammatical/spelling errors; should be: imperative, was loath to, etc.
-Thesis is a little weak but is passable.
-1st example: if you’re using a personal example, then you need to be more specific. you’re very general, which is unconvincing. try to think of a specific incident with possibly names (can be fake) and just the situation.
-2nd example: better, because it’s from literature but it’s very confusing. In the beginning you’re saying the father is the authority figure that is failing Huck but in the end, you’re turning to the judge as the authority figure who fails Huck and should be questioned.
-end: at the end, i like how you mentioned and compared the teachers with the judge.</p>

3

<p>No matter how he? What about she? A big misconception that only men have power.</p>

<p>6/12</p>

<p>Vocab is rudimentary.
Examples are unconvincing (personal experiences should not be paragraph 2, buy I think you should never use personal experience)
Essay is too short
Unfortunate grammar and misuse of vocabulary.</p>

<p>Definitely needs work.</p>

<p>However, your point is clearly made, but it is not convincing.</p>

<p>If I were an examiner It would be very generous If I gave you anything higher than 7.</p>

<p>Keep up the work though :)</p>