sooo i got accepted into Groton, and I’m really curious as to what kind of stuff happens there. Like behind the scenes, non-academic kind of stuff?? I mean like partying and things related to that. I’m not necessarily planing on doing that kind of stuff but i just want to know, you know? Even other boarding schools, what REALLY goes on there when the teachers aren’t watching???
They study. A lot. And complain about not having snow days.
Just kidding, there are people who do drugs and go to the city on the weekends just to party. There’s a huge hook up culture at boarding schools, so people get creative with their hook up spots like the chapel, auditorium, art room, etc. It’s really easy to avoid the people who do drugs, since most of the kids don’t do it.
Boy, good question - and I’m going to riff on it. You’ll have a ton of choices to make when you land at Groton (or any boarding school). There will be all kinds of pressure from different sources: peers, teachers, older students, prefects, administrators, work load etc. And when no one is looking, that’s when it gets really interesting. Can you make good decisions by yourself? Can you see ahead to different possible consequences? This is tough for anyone much less a new teenager.
Should you have any actual free time when you’re a freshman (unlikely), my advice to you is simple, and this applies to any high school kid: give yourself time to think about a decision before blurting out an answer or jumping on a bandwagon. Get used to saying, “let me think about it.” It’s the same reason why it’s smart to read an English paper the next day before you turn it in. You suddenly spot all your errors from the night before because you gave yourself a bit of time to let things percolate. This simple discipline of avoiding snap decisions and practicing thoughtfulness will help you more than you can know.
The only caveat I have to this rule is where kindness is concerned, kindness to other kids who are struggling in one way or another. Let kindness flourish as an instinct. Never wait to be kind and never let any peer, or group of peers, stop or slow your kindness.
@ThacherParent - It’s beautiful. I am forwarding it to my daughter.
@ThacherParent - ahhh, my old CC compatriot, that’s a good post. If kids adopt that one habit of taking time before making a decision, it will go a long way to preventing the usual self-inflicted wounds. Your point on kindness is also well taken. There’s a great movie line in an unsung but awesome film called The Way where a likeable character, Joost, is described as someone “for whom kindness is an instinct.” I still remember those few kids back in high school who were noticeably kind to everyone, a pretty small group, but a great one.
Since ThacherParent has already answered your question better than I could ever do myself, I’ll ask a question that hs been on my mind since spotting this thread.
You say “i got accepted into Groton, and I’m really curious as to what kind of stuff happens there.”…
My question is this: Isn’t the time to be curious about this sort of thing more like last summer, before you applied?
Over my years on the forum, you are not alone in asking a similar question with similar timing, but I am always surprised that people who have applied and ostensibly been admitted to some fairly selective boarding schools seem to know so little about the schools they will call home in just a few weeks.
Even if you could not visit the school in person due to distance or finances (or both), I would think that kids would want to know what they are getting into sooner rather than later.
Best of luck. And yeah, what ThacherParent said.
That’s a great point. I won’t deny that you make a good point - however, even with the extensive research that applicants do before applying to a school, these schools seem to do a great job of censoring all the bad things that go on there. I did do a lot of research on Groton last summer, but unfortunately, a lot wasn’t enough - in regards to the stuff that goes on ‘behind the scenes’. Schools just don’t want people to know about that stuff understandably, so you can’t really just google it. I understand your point though.
Of course you can.
http://lmgtfy.com/?q=groton+school+scandals
ThacherParent’s advice is good advice. Works for adults, too
Awesome advice @ThacherParent , will send it to my kid… !!