<p>The problem is that for boys it is "brown nosing" and "sucking up", while for girls it is what you do - the teacher assigns homework, you do it; you are supposed to sit still in class, you do it. The simple truth is, even if its not PC to mention this, that be it from nature or nurture, by the time kids are teens girls and boys are definitely wired differently (I think they are born different,personally), and the characteristics of girls make them generally more successful in that social setting we call "school".</p>
<p>(I'd like to see the birth order study, because my observation is that birth order can overcome gender sometimes.)</p>
<p>Ctymom - "school" though, is not life, and many of the things that hamper boys in school are advantages in later life. Also (I'll get flamed for this one), we are just beginning to understand the subtle effects of hormones on the brain vs the obvious effects of hormones on the body. I think we will learn eventually, in a scientific way, what lots of "old wives" have known always - until young boys get their juices settled down, get through puberty completely, which maybe age 18-19 - they don't quite think logically, or clearly, or, unfortunately, safely.</p>
<p>For example, DD has for the last 6 years, periodically fussed about busywork, and made comments about teacher pleasing - but she still does it, because she is practical, you got to play the game to get ahead. My son at 13 is already showing signs of why do I have to study or do the busywork when I understand the material - he truly doesn't get why you have to do it, and when the reasons are brought home to him, he gets angry (aggressive) and refuses - so there!
It is fascinating to watch and heartbreaking to live through.</p>