<p>I definitely second the idea of visiting nearby schools of different “types.” Point out to your S the benefits of a smaller school, but don’t try to convince him to attend–he’ll be happiest at the place he chooses himself, as long as it is financially feasible.</p>
<p>Like mathmom, I spent part of my childhood in a relatively isolated location (technically an urban port city, but the sole city of a Canadian island is quite different from what one thinks of as “urban” America); I’ve also visited schools like Williams (it doesn’t get much smaller than Williamstown, MA) and found the town only a little too small. For comparison, I thought the town of Oberlin was fine. Visit and tell your S to go with his gut.</p>
Doesn’t sound right to me… I just ran the EFC calculator at the College Board, using my state (California) and $60k income. I got an EFC of a little over $4500 for both the federal and institutional methodologies. </p>
<p>Tuffy, it’s worth running the calculator for yourself, with your own real numbers. Check finaid.org for lots of info about how financial aid works.</p>
<p>Thanks so much to you all. I guess I’ll give him a little breathing room, let him make some suggestions, and remember to be open. In reality, with all honesty, my husband and I so want both our boys to do something that makes them happy. If that means being a 2nd grade teacher, a lawyer, a computer scientist, or something else entirely, that’s what I have to stand behind. Life is much too short to do what you think you SHOULD do instead of what your gut tells you. Thanks again!</p>
<p>Most definitely start the visits early this summer. Go to as many as you can and check out each school’s website & look for “visit days/tours”. They are more helpful than just walking around alone. We pulled out our calendar and just started scheduling several weekends … (A few of the schools had local hotel/motels that gave discounts to the university “family”, and as a prospective student, we took advantage.) College-shopping was big for us last summer into fall. She’s our oldest, so we hadn’t done this before.</p>
<p>I encouraged my D to look at a few Us she hadn’t considered. In some cases, she just didn’t like the “vibe” of the campus, etc. After seeing 3 or 4, she started having legitimate preferances due to strong departments, campus “feel”, opportunities, etc. (Read the funny thread in the Parent section about "stupid reasons your child wouldn’t go to a certain U.) </p>
<p>It’s just too intangible to make informed decisions if you haven’t “shopped” As the school college counselors will tell you, have some “safetys”, “targets” and a few reasonable “reaches”. I also suggest your S consider taking the SAT again. Most of my Ds friends, and my daughter, increased their score the second time around, and since the school’s use the strongest score, it couldn’t hurt.</p>
<p>Tuffy- two years ago a friend was convinced her shy, reserved son would be nurtured at a small LAC, so they focused on those schools. Gettysburg, Muhlenberg, Dickinson, Ursinus- he ended up at Washington College, but he left after one year.
Funny thing is she attended Penn State, and thought it was too large for her son.</p>
<p>Well, he transferred to much larger school in NY, where his best friend was going, and is doing quite well. </p>
<p>Perhaps the small school was too much like a fishbowl, and it was hard for him to find his niche. </p>
<p>So the journey will unfold, there is a reason he is attracted to Penn State- school spirit? football ?</p>
<p>Something that really helped me was to imagine the worst case scenario:that my dd ended up at a school where she was miserable. Would she say “the school MOM picked is not right for me” or would she say “I thought I wanted this, but it turns out it’s not a good fit.” I knew, after 18 years with my daughter, that it had to be her decision, and that she was capable of making a good one.</p>
<p>She changed her priorities somewhat during the search. At first she said no small schools. After a few visits and more research she realized that she didn’t want a small school in a small town. I think she figured out that she wanted a lot of excitement and variety, and she might get that on a big campus, or she might get that at a small school located in or near a big exciting city.</p>
<p>Tuffy, our situation had some parallels to yours. I’m a Michigan graduate and although I received a wonderful situation it wasn’t the best fit for me at the time. I was, at 17, overwhelmed by its size and impersonal atmosphere and wasn’t able to take advantage of everything that a large, dynamic university offered. When the time came for my son to look at colleges I encouraged him to explore colleges of different sizes and character types. </p>
<p>We visited 14 schools – large, medium, small; rural, suburban, urban; conservative, liberal; political, artsy – and through this process my son gravitated toward small LACs. His short list did include some urban and suburban schools, but his top choices tended to be insular and rural. He attended Williams and had a phenomenally good experience. He forged close relationships with several professors who helped him enormously while he was at Williams with internships and summer programs and after graduation with a fulltime job in his field and eventually with graduate school recommendations. This kind of support is available at large universities, but the student has to be somewhat assertive to go after it.</p>
<p>Small LACs have strongly individual personalities so it’s important for your son to spend some time on campus and to trust his instinctive reaction to the atmosphere. If he reacts negatively, move on; there are plenty of other choices. If he reacts positively, try to find similar schools in the same general ambience, ideally in different levels of selectivity so that your son will have several good fits across the reach/match/safety categories.</p>
<p>In addition to grades, rank and scores, selective LACs put a lot of weight on extra-curriculars and many of their students are top students as well as athletes, artists, musicians, actors etc. Admissions tend to favor kids who will contribute to the campus community in more than one way and demonstrated interest is important.</p>
<p>Turning down an ED offer because of financial shortage is not something that you want to plan for as a strategy. While technically feasible, it can be harmful to the reputation of the student and the high school. Most colleges follow a formula for need based aid and you should be able to get an idea of what your family is likely to get before your son applies. The difference is that if he applies ED you won’t be able to compare offers from other schools – especially those that offer merit aid – so it’s something that you have to think through carefully.</p>
As the school college counselors will tell you, have some “safetys”, “targets” and a few reasonable “reaches”. I also suggest your S consider taking the SAT again. Most of my Ds friends, and my daughter, increased their score the second time around, and since the school’s use the strongest score, it couldn’t hurt.</p>