@blossom the school made it clear that it would be needed when heavy clinical work started - by first semester of junior year - at the time we went to the accepted student day so I am not really surprised by it. And my understanding is that this is not unusual.
I will probably just leave it as giving her my expectation and then of course I won’t finance it (any extra trips) and being as the tolls alone from her college to our area are probably a $50 expense and the gas would probably add another $40 each trip, she probably won’t be able to do it much if at all - I really hope the boyfriend does actually get into the marine corp like he says he wants to (he is apparently underweight right now) or does something post graduation that keeps him more occupied too.
I find it odd that most nursing programs would assume all the students in the program would have a car. I also highly doubt that all their students could afford to buy a car for the program…
High performing nursing student and a BF who hasn’t figured out what he wants to do with his life? At some point, surely another young man will cross her path???
@blossom GOOD GOD I hope so…
I took a bus to do my internship at the state capitol, but it was a pain and took extra time. It was also one city to another, so an express bus and multiple buses per day, but still took planning, time waiting for buses, a walk on both ends to get to the bus stops.
OP, how did they do this year with the long distance relationship? Did he travel there or did she come home more than a few times? If yes, I’d not expect that change and you’ll have to be firm. I’d also scheduled the trips home that you will allow - for a family event, for fall/spring break.
And yes, hope that he joins the marines.
@twoinanddone I think they were very constrained because he doesn’t have the money to drive to her and she doesn’t have a car or the money to drive to him - plus he was a high school student still. Of course he may have been there without me knowing, but it definitely didn’t seem so as she was doing a lot of studying with her nursing student friends and such (they would facetime me and such). She came home at major breaks - so maybe 2 - 3 times a semester for a week or long weekend.
Talking to my kid about getting a parking pass next year to take a car to campus and he mentioned maybe he’d start ubering to pick up extra cash. Um, no! It made me wonder how many students are doing so for extra cash with their parents unaware.
My cousin did it although his parents knew about it. He mostly drove from campus to the airport, airport back to campus. Made some extra money; seems like it was at the expense of his social life and not academics. Wouldn’t have been my first choice for an off-campus job though…
I had a nurse myself. I work at a school with a nursing program. Clinicals for one rotation were 90 miles away at the state mental hospital. Professors got students together to arrange car pools. Generally, clinicals are NOT scheduled overnight or into the wee hours as a member of the nursing faculty must be on site during the clinical, and your faculty aren’t going to schedule those hours (although there’s always that ONE).
You talk about “heavy clinicals.” I’m not sure exactly what that means, but as classes/theory are still required, it’s hard to believe she’s going to have them daily for a year. There probably is one semester that is just dreadful. If you don’t want her to have a car for whatever reason, let her borrow one of yours for the dreadful semester and then take it back.
No, a car is not absolutely necessary, but it is convenient. Up to you to provide, but if it were me, and I chose to provide one, I would be demanding she earn her own gas money at a minimum. That’s got nothing to do with the bf, btw, just that I’m now an “Aww…honey…here’s everything you may need” kind of parent.
Is this your daughter at York? I graduated from there about 15 years ago. Most students had cars back then… I would assume most do these days as well. I bought my own car when I was 16 and took it with me, but I know a few of my roommates had cars that their parents had bought them. I’m not sure what their rules were around driving places… but I do remember that it was usually me that drove us around. Probably because I was the only one with a job and money for gas. 
I guess my point is, if she doesn’t have the money, she can’t go far. 
You also can impose other reasonable restrictions such as no one else drives the car, ever, if you own and insure it.
We all worry about the choices our newly adult children will make while away at school. You have a semester without the need for the car while the boyfriend is out of school so I would take a more wait and see approach. Don’t expect her grades to stay level and try not to blame it on the relationship. Nursing classes are a very different way of learning and she will be stressed enough without a lot of push back. My nursing major daughter joined a sorority this year (soph) and her grades dipped a bit. Did it have some thing to do with it? Probably, but not totally. She knows what grades she needs in the classes to pass (she needs at least a B- in all prerequisites and nursing classes.) You can have a talk during winter break if you find it necessary, with both of them if he is still in the picture.
As for clinicals, it would be highly expensive for a college to provide transportation to them since each one usually has 10 or less students per section so there would be lots of different places various students would have to be. Perspective students know this and plan accordingly. They are usually also aware (or need to be) of the extra costs clinicals and nursing classes in general entail. It is not a cheap major.
@BuckeyeMWDSG I’m all for my kid working a bit in college to earn spending money and to help out with certain costs (as long as it doesn’t affect grades), but I don’t know how I’d feel about Uber or Lyft. Seems like it would add more wear and tear on his or her car. And wouldn’t it raise insurance rates?
Hopefully this is not Buckeyes (etc) owned/registered car and jr is not on family insurance. Imagine the drama this will create when the uber driver kid is found to be uninsured and the victims come after the family. I really don't think we do a great job as a society to explain what insurance actually covers.
I’ve got nothing against Uber and Lyft…but if I am paying for my kid’s car and insurance, I wouldn’t want them to drive for a ride sharing company. If my kid is paying for their own car, then it’s their choice.