<p>There are schools which offer support in a non-judgmental “all successful people struggle from time to time” kind of way. And those that do not.</p>
<p>I don’t know if you can predict which kids are going to slip into something troubling. But I think you can predict which schools will be highly supportive. </p>
<p>I know kids at MIT, Yale, Wash U (so not super huge but not tiny by any means) who have found HIGHLY supportive deans, residential counselors, Masters, etc. who pretty much walked them over to health services and handed them the phone and said, “Call your mom to let her know you’re OK and that I’m with you.” And then we all hear the stories of kids who fall through the cracks and then the parents are left wondering why there was no adult to notice that the kid hadn’t left the room in four days. or was hiding out in a computer lab and not coming home to shower. etc.</p>
<p>So I think you can ask questions and observe. If it takes three days to get a non-emergency appointment with a psychiatrist on campus that would be a red-flag to me. If the RA’s role is to make sure the kids don’t burn down the dorm but doesn’t engage or know the kids names- that’s a red flag. If the Dean of Students has a voice mail message which warns “If my mailbox is full then send me an email” that’s a red flag.</p>