I visited BU this week and fell in love with the school. I have wanted to go here since 8th grade, and I think visiting made that even stronger. On the other hand, my parents are extremely against the idea. My mom is constantly telling me that it isnt going to work out and that its too far from New Jersey (where I live) and that I shouldnt even apply. This is extremely upsetting to me because all through high school my goal has been to get into BU and the fact that she thinks its “not gonna work out” is extremely upsetting to me. Most schools in New Jersey are poorly ranked and not prestigious (besides Princeton and Rutgers) and I dont see the point in going to these ok-schools if I can get in somewhere better. I know that boston is the place for me, but without my parents support I dont know what to do 
Maybe she means that it won’t work out financially.
Will your mom actively stop you from applying? (ie: not pay for your app fee) If not, it can’t hurt to apply. What do you want to major in/have a career in? I could give you some pitch points if you give me some ideas 
And why does she think it won’t work out? That you won’t get in? That your family can’t afford it? The “too far” argument is funny b/c BU is SO CLOSE to NJ! I went to BU from GA, and knew kids who attended from the West Coast XD But most BU kids are from MA, NY & NJ.
I know! It is not that far my mom is just nervous bc im the first to go to college. I really want to get into the Sargent College program for Health Science to become a physicians assistant. I think part of the reason is because she saw the city area and thinks it will be hard to get in and out of the school easily. Also Im a twin, so financial aid is extremely important for me and my family since we are both going to college at the same time, and 50,000 tuition times two then times four… well you get the point lol
Oh, you can definitely make a case for BU! Sargent is such a good program! It’s a unique opportunity to not only get highly specialized education for your field from a top university, but get a broad liberal arts education. Plus, and this should be a huge selling point for at least applying: BU is very generous with merit aid. Your stats are good, and if you can really nail your essay (especially for Sargent), you would have a shot at merit aid. (BU=cares about essays) Plus, if you have any interest in study abroad, BU’s program is amazing–over 20 countries and most of the programs have awesome internship components. You can show your mom and maybe sway her.
Boston’s pretty easy! If you’re flying, you go in and out of Logan, hop on the T, go Blue line to Government Center, then the Green Line (B train) to BU. I did that journey many times, since I traveled from GA. But NJ to Boston is actually very realistic by car, especially for move-in and move-out. It shouldn’t be as bad as she thinks!
In general, since both you and your twin will go to school at the same time, look for schools that are generous with merit aid. BU is one, but there are many others… even if BU is your dream school, it would be smart to apply to several (especially some safeties) just in case finances are the sticking point. But also plan ahead, and apply to BU Early Action–you may get more money from them than you think
Do the cost of attendance calculation for it. There should be a calculator on BU’s financial aid page. Keep in mind a freshman can only qualify for $5500 in loans by himself or herself. Decide where the remaining funds will come from. They don’t give much aid. It’s immature to expect that your parents mortgage their own futures for your school fees.
You need to sit down with your parents and ask them, without throwing a temper tantrum, why they do not want you to go to BU. Chances are the cost scares them, as it does most parents. Or perhaps they feel that you are not mature enough to go that far away to college.
The net price calculator will tell you the max grant that you would qualify for, but keep in mind that BU does not promise to give you that amount in grant aid. They will max out your loans first, then use academic profile to determine how much of that grant you will actually be awarded. So don’t assume that you will actually receive all the grant aid listed on the calculator. There is a link right next to the calculator link that gives examples of the types of students who get large grants. So if they really want you, they could give you the max grant that you qualify for.
Also, there are half tuition and full tuition scholarships that are also available.
I don’t know if BU stacks merit and grant aid or not. My D did receive offers that included both merit and need based grants, but not from BU.
Perhaps your mother is just overly concerned about your theoretical disappointment if a) you don’t get in or b) you get in but they can’t pay for it. I don’t really blame her. BU admissions is getting very competitive. This year’s average SAT was over 2000 and I believe the admit rate was somewhere around 30%. Maybe you could convince your mother that you know that there is a real possibility that either a or b will happen, but that you won’t have a breakdown over it. Show a lot of interest in other schools that you know you can get in to and afford, so that she realizes that you won’t be crushed if you can’t go.
I also agree with TomSrOfBoston. Going away to college takes maturity. Going away to college in a major city without clearly defined campus boundaries takes maturity and savvy. If you have been particularly sheltered, they may simply fear the city more than the distance. As a test, you could ask her how she feels about a small, liberal arts college that is just as far away, but in a small town.
EDIT: found the link: http://www.bu.edu/finaid/apply/incoming/freshman-receiving-scholarships/
its not a matter of me wanting my parents to go into debt over my education, i would never want that. its just that neither of my parents went to college, and my twin sister and i are on different academic levels (she has a hard time in school). this is affecting their opinion on college because they see my sister wanting to apply to smaller, easier, and less expensive colleges while im going for the bigger universities which they dont understand. Neither of my parents ever had college debt either, so I think it scares them more than the average person. I think being a twin is my biggest disadvantage when it comes to my parents because they are constantly comparing what me and my sister want and its just impossible because we are both so different, plus they will be “losing” two kids at once so I think that scares my mom. I havent taken the SAT yet, but my grades are all A’s with an average of one or two B+'s in honors classes, except I got a B+ in Algebra 2 freshman year which was not an honors class.
Im a very independent person, and I have common sense. Its just that whenever I forget something small like a notebook at school or something every once in a while, my parents response tends to be “How are you going to go far away if you cant remember anything!?”. I think this is a little extreme lol obviously I will forget something once in a while, and Im sure college students do that too.
@proudterrier is sargent really that competitive? When I toured it seemed like one of the smaller programs and I honestly didnt know about it until a few weeks ago lol. I always thought questrom and arts and sciences were the harder programs to get into.
Also, can someone please suggest to me similar schools to BU that I should be looking into? I want to have other options of course, these are the ones I have so far
- Boston U
- Northeastern
- Monmouth (Safety- In NJ and easy to get into its like a 75% acceptance rate)
- George Washington U (one of my other top schools-- I really love DC and their public health/physicians assistant program is top ranked)
- American U (also in DC and has a higher acceptance rate, around 43% so its not as hard as GW or BU but still high)
- William and Mary (this is a reach I think, especially for out of state students)
- UConn (Safety)
- Rutgers (MAJOR SAFETY-- its basically a ritual in NJ to apply to rutgers, something I hate greatly lol)
- University of Maryland (On the safer side but I would really consider going)
You cannot put together a list without SAT scores. After you have what you think is your best score in hand (not a practise test), then you can start looking for schools that are realistic. Once you have that list, you purge by affordability. Finally, you select schools that you can afford in varying degrees of selectivity that you like. There is no point in selecting schools based on programs that you are either not competitive at and/or you won’t be able to afford. Without an official SAT or ACT score, you can’t really do too much.
rn im just going off grade point average and average grades lol its just what im thinking rn im sure it will change over time
My parents don’t want me to go either and said they won’t cosign for any loans or help me financially in any way shape or form… Mind you they signs for loans for my sister to go to upenn and supported her financially her entire time there … Don’t worry about them do what you wanna do I know I am
Why don’t you look into Pitt? It is in an urban environment, but with Carnegie Mellon and one other college right in the Oakland Neighborhood of Pittsburgh it almost feels self-contained compared to BU. Plus the health sciences are top notch there.
^ thank you for the suggestion! i will definitely look into it