Temple and Pitt: both are a little pricey for out-of-state students, but less than some other public colleges (e.g. UCs, Michigan, et al). Penn State is in the middle of nowhere, so I don’t see it as appropriate for someone who wants an urban setting. Temple and Pitt both play serious, D-1 sports, have Greek life, but are located in exciting, affordable cities with sizable Jewish populations. U. of Miami is another possibility, if she qualifies for merit aid, and USF or UCF are possible if Tampa/St. Pete and Orlando meet her criteria for urban (they don’t quite meet mine, although I like downtown St. Pete). Rutgers has a very substantial, active Jewish population (it’s Jersey, for Pete’s sake), although there have been some publicized brush-ups with its sizable Muslim student population (the same is true at Temple, and probably at most large, diverse universities).
Although out West, the University of Arizona offers all of those perks as well as strong financial aid opportunities.
There is a decent Jewish community (people throw around the joke nickname Jew of A for U of A), crazy school spirit and great sports teams, rigorous academics if you are a serious student, and plenty of opportunities to have fun. Also, Tucson is a Liberal city of 1 million +, with plenty of outdoor activities and a quick drive to Phoenix if it gets too boring (as well as CA and Mexico).
All that you described will depend on YOUR KID choices and not the place.
She can have everything that her heart desires practically everywhere (I guess, her preference is to be in a city, so I mean any campus that is located in a city). Why to choose OOS publics? They will be just as expensive or more expensive than privates. She also needs to stay flexible as sometime they choose certain activities at college that they did not plan to participate in at all.
IMO, nobody can point out such a school to anybody. A student needs to research, visit multiple times, parents may visit with and without a kid and then family will be able to form their own opinion about places that seem to be meeting their own criteria. Whatever was a good fit for anybody here, may or may not be a good fit for your kid at all.
As an example, my D. did not want to be at U of Cinci (in-state for us), where her Bro was very happy to attend. In addition, U of Cinci did not even offer her much in Merit scholarships.
My D’s dislike of U of Cinci has nothing to do with your kid decision making and should not influence her in any shape of form. And it could be said about any advice here.
Sometimes I wonder what would happen if teens were given school profiles with all identifying details taken out and asked to compare them. I think it can be tough to get past a name, so they miss what could be a great fit.
If your state flagship has a lot of what your daughter wants, I’d suggest that she add it to her list in case she changes her mind. If she has affordable options and chooses not to go there, she loses nothing. But if she doesn’t apply, then she doesn’t have the luxury of changing her mind.