<p>My Background:
I am from a family that has just recently started struggling financially. I've been raised in a middle-upper class family until now. My family made <40,000 this past year. I have received all As throughout high school and am ranked 7/392 in my class. I take very rigorous schedules and have had many achievements in science fair competitions, where I have won 'Best in Fair' distinctions and have placed 3rd at the international science fair. Just this past year I worked 2 part time jobs, and at one point held a paid internship along with 2 jobs. I am involved in various ECs and sports. Given my background...here are the topics I've brainstormed for the COMMON APP essay:</p>
<ol>
<li><p>A story of my family's financial struggle with their restaurant business, my contributions to help, the result which ignited a drive in me to strive for the best. It will read first as a narrative vignette of a typical day working at the restaurant, then moving into the struggle my family experienced and how I coped through it all. </p></li>
<li><p>Science fair competitions. It will begin as a narrative of when I spoke to a finalist at the Intel International Science and Engineering Fair. It will discuss my discovery of the sky being the limit and how anything, absolutely anything is truly possible if you put your mind and heart to it. Regardless of one's age, educational background, or ethnicity, we as a people are capable of more than we could possibly imagine.</p></li>
<li><p>My third world experience in the Fiji Islands! Begin as a narrative of a bargaining my mom and a fijian merchant in the market. It will discuss my discovery of a new lifestyle and how diverse of world truly is. It will discuss my admiration to Fijians and the simplicity of their relaxing lifestyles, and how thereafter my heart opened up to everyone and I saw everyone as equal coming from their own unique backgrounds. </p></li>
<li><p>My 2nd grade teacher who saw bright things ahead of me. It will begin as a narrative of when I got in trouble for the first time in class. It will discuss how my favorite teacher helped push me to my limits and give me hope--as before this I was simply a average student. She helped me discover that effort and heart is all it takes to succeed.</p></li>
</ol>
<p>I like 1 the best. The others just don’t compare in my opinion.</p>
<p>It shows that you didn’t always have things handed to you. It shows that family is very important in your life. It has a common, yet somewhat foreign, setting.</p>
<p>I like the first one! I would suggest doing that one. If you pick another one though, I would suggest not doing the third, because I’ve heard from lots of college admissions people that the traveling thing is very overdone, and that it’s difficult to stand out that way unless you write it extremely well. But the first one sounds different and unique and if you write it well it should be great! :)</p>
<h1>1, both because the story is compelling and you described what you’d write as a vignette. You’re also probably the first person I’ve ever seen with 4 fully fleshed out ideas for their college essay.</h1>
<p>Thank you collectivsynergy for the advice. I am planning on writing a small episode of a typical day in the restaurant (this will be the vignette) then discussing the restaurant and my parents’ issues as well as how it affected me, etc. So in entirety it’s not going to be a vignette, but the vignette will be the ‘intro’ so to speak. Thanks again for the help! It means a lot!</p>
<p>Anyone else or should this be the final decision?!</p>
Hmm I really imagined it at night, in the winter when you’re in school. Preferably snowing out. It’s hard to describe, but that setting has the best “feel” to it. My second favorite setting would be a hot summer night. </p>
<p>In short, the best setting is night. There is a certain appeal to a restaurant at night. The neon lights. The dinner parties in no hurry to leave. The homely atmosphere. Cleaning up after everyone has left. Dividing up the tips. Etc.</p>
<p>What the winter adds is an added dimension of “this is where I want to be, with family in this well-lit restaurant instead of alone in the cold” and “I have school work to be done, but I’m here instead.” Yeah, just my two cents.</p>
<p>Yes I definitely see what image you’re picturing. But keep in mind this was a struggling restaurant business, so the picture I am going to write about is: the lonesome cafe with the lucky one table for dinner at night and our family in the back keeping busy cleaning and doing dishes. The late sunday night when I have piles of homework still to do before school starts the next day…</p>
<p>The essay will be about my family’s economic struggle with the restaurant, and the eventual shutting down due to the hard losses we experienced. It will then discuss what I took from it and how I can learn from my parents’ hardships. </p>
<p>Would this be compelling and help the reader understand me better? Thanks!</p>
<p>That’s a fine picture, since it’s at night. </p>
<p>A bit depressing though, to be honest. I don’t know about the strength of your relation with your parents, but this must have added a new dimension. Did you bond with your parents in some way by working with them, struggling with them? </p>
<p>For instance, have you ever seen “The Day After Tomorrow”? There’s a scene where a teenager (Jake G.) is talking about his favorite vacation. It was him and his dad, and they were doing a research mission to the north pole or something. Well their boat broke down and it rained every day. Jake’s friend then says “that sounds really boring.” Jake replies that it was the most time him and his dad ever spent together and they really bonded. </p>
<p>You see where I’m going? Maybe instead of talking about how you learned a bit about bankruptcy law or wherever you were gonna go with that, talk about how despite these hardships, you saw what was really important- family. The Stanford admissions counselor who admitted me told me how she liked that I showed that my family and friends came first. Grounded people are really lacking today at top colleges.</p>
<p>Just something to consider. But of course if you didn’t get closer with your family through this experience then don’t consider writing about that.</p>
<p>Thank you very much for your insight everyone. Especially @Senior0991–your insight helped me organize my thoughts better. My rough draft is in working progress! All your help has been greatly appreciated!</p>
<p>Number 1 for sure, BUT… There are some dangers. Here are some important things to remember:</p>
<ol>
<li><p>The true topic of the essay is YOU. The situation is only a backdrop for conveying something about you. But it sounds like you are OK here, keeping the focus on how YOU are affected.</p></li>
<li><p>The essay should go about like you planned, EXCEPT that IT SHOULD NOT BE ABOUT HOW YOU COPED!!! Rather, it should be about how the experience CHANGED you. Character development - especially into a stronger, more caring, or wiser YOU is VERY important. You’ve got all the elements to make it happen. Just be sure to show, narratively (think of the paragraphs of the essay like movie scenes) the stronger you at the end.</p></li>
<li><p>Make the first paragraph a hook into the rest. I like the idea of a scene that grabs the reader’s attention. Perhaps evern start off with humor… until you realize the depth of the problem.</p></li>
</ol>
<p>It sounds like you have this under control and it would not take much tweaking to make it a powerful essay.</p>
<p>Final beware:</p>
<ol>
<li>Beware asking for too much advice on it. You’ll want some general advice and help on grammar and word choice, but it must be in your voice. Too much input disguises that. Think of your essay like a hardwood floor: You want it to be polished… to a point. Too much polish and the reflection off the polish will hide the grain of the wood. And that grain (your voice) is exactly what needs to come through. Don’t worry about getting it too perfect. It will then become (I guarantee you) another forgettable essay.</li>
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<p>My essay on prompt number 1 is complete after several drafts and some advice and work with a college essay teacher. Anyone willing to read it? :)</p>