<p>@ the OP: you sound like you know what you’re doing and how you’re going to achieve it. i was in your position at one point and was eventually able to conquer it. at the start of high school i only knew a few people and only was in one or two clubs. now, as a rising senior, i am president of a few clubs, should be captain of a varsity sport next year, not necessarily “popular” in the traditional sense, but confident and known within my school.</p>
<p>the point is: you need to change, for yourself, first–college admissions comes as a distant second, or probably even below that. you can not live your entire life hiding in the background when you know that you can be a standout, when you know you could be doing more, and especially when you go to bed at night wondering how much more you could have done.</p>
<p>i think it comes down to how badly you want to do this, and for me, it came down to mere determination and forceful stepping outside of my comfort zone. know that people will probably be like “why is this kid different so suddenly?” but the main thing to remember is not to care what they think–before long, especially if your change is fast yet gradual (oxymoron, i know) you’ll be a strong force in your class.</p>
<p>do NOT listen to the posters who just tell you not to care and just to live your life. probably, they’re confusing your plight with insecurity and confidence with the typical angsty teenage struggle for popularity and friends. being able to speak out, being able to stand out, and more importantly confidence are KEY life skills that can not be neglected. high school is a perfect time to develop these skills before going out into college and the real world, where these skills will ultimately decide your future for you–so change it while you still can.</p>
<p>lastly, do not be so hard on yourself. it’s a gradual process and no one can expect to be one person one day and another the next. uncomfortableness is normal, so don’t be afraid of it–just think of how much you want this, because i think this is something you’ve wanted for a long time.</p>
<p>What is OP anyway?
Here is how a counsin of mine escaped from being a “nerd”: About a year ago he ditched all my nerdy looking clothes to more relaxed ones. At the same time he changed his curly haircut to a spiky one. He bought a stylish pair of glasses. That’s simple</p>
what i’ve seen is that out of the billion people in india there are so many castes, clans and other groupings of people that it’s nearly impossible for parents to pressure kids. the parents that have made there ways to “developed countries” are generally trying to make it so that their kids have a better chance at living the lives that the parents wish they had or that their families had.
it’s like a power struggle kind ofish for indians. my parents are always yelling at me to do better at math and wonder how the hell i got so good at english because it wasn’t even my first language and they believe that jobs which relate to science and math will be in higher demand. it’s just that mentality.
i’m also indian so i have a lifetime of experience of this. =/</p>
<p>topic: there’s no need for you to TRY to change yourself. just put yourself out into activities which you think are worth your while and if you feel that you can create a change, which anyone can if they want to, put yourself in a position to do that. you can force yourself to change, it just slowly happens. you can enjoy high school with even the smallest group of friends. it’s quality that matters, not quantity. ;p
i’ve learned that if your smart, word gets out and more people know you and more people just try to talk to you. watch out for people that try to use you for your brains though. =/
if you’re looking to change your style up a bit, then try going classy.
if you’re looking to break the stereotype a bit, join a sport, one that you enjoy of course.</p>
<p>be yourself, don’t go out of your way to be something entirely different. it takes about 3 months for minor changes to even occur, that’s what this one study said. :] heh.</p>
<p>and because your friends are outgoing then consider doing some things that they do, but that seems like an obvious choice. =/</p>
<p><em>sigh</em> being Asian is so tough. I grew up in a predominantly white town and rarely ever saw an Asian, besides my family. TBH before i went to a magnet high school, because I did well in middle school (not because of a stupid stereotype, but it was because it was who I was), I didn’t even know there were Asian stereotypes. At my high school I met a lot of Asians who were really intense. Needless to say, I had a hard time trying to shine like I did before with so many other kids doing better and making fun of my lack of Asian culture.</p>
<p>Just today I went to the library to pick up a few CDs. Sat down to do a few problems that I was confused about. I saw a huge group of Asians studying together. First off, they weren’t even from my town (which is now unusual since my town has one of the nicest libraries in the county). But the most absurd thing was that they were there for so long in the SUMMER on a BEAUTIFUL DAY.</p>
<p>It sucks that many other Asians really raise the bar for expectations and create such stereotypes. Therefore typical average Asians tend to have the disadvantage in college applications (in certain schools, but several well known ones) more so than other applicants of the same stats (i realize - well known fact). But i gotta live with it. </p>
<p>Anyways as for the OP, have fun with life and push yourself into social situations. Eavesdrop into conversations (casually) and see if people talk about anything that you are also interested in. Build up your confidence.</p>
<p>I destroyed the typical Asian stereotype. I basically hung out with a lot of jocks i guess. I never really talked to a lot of asians. Everyone was puzzled by my place in high school. Also I wrestled during high school. I was a team captain and homecoming king where i got to kiss a very cute girl =]. But I still made pretty good grades; I even got the Gates Millennium Scholarship! Confidence is key in social interactions. So find confidence in yourself in make it happen</p>
<p>I have an Asian friend who every brags about his “antiAsianess” and at the same time acts stuck up and like “I didn’t care about other Asians are doing, I hate Asians”. So this unbecoming kid makes jokes about Asian (?) like FOB and Chinese and slanted eyes etc. So the Hispanics are always cracked up and think of Asian as nerds and FOB and ******** (you name it)</p>
<p>I am asian but I don’t really fit the stereotype, probably due to the fact that there are only about 5 other asians in my entire HS and like 3 of them are in ESL. I played varsity lax from 10th - 12th grade and played varsity basketball 12th grade (was injured 11th grade w/ broke wrist) as well which is not very typical of asian kids (most asians I know play golf or tennis). I’ve never dated an asian girl before, only caucasians but again, I grew up in an almost 100% white area. I do care about my grades but I definitely have a good social life and would never stay home to study on like a friday or saturday night. I do fit the stereotype in that I can’t drink a lot because I have this flush thing where my face turns pretty red after several beers and my body can’t digest the alcohol, which is kinda good cause it keeps me in check with my limits. So I guess in some sense I fit this stereotypes but at the same time, there are many qualities about myself that do not fit at all.</p>
<p>Just be yourself. There is nothing wrong with that. If people don’t like you for who you are (and you sound like a smart, friendly guy) then you don’t want to associate yourself with them.</p>