<p>"The Columbia thing is not something I encouraged. I've told her it would be too expensive. I found out after the fact she applied, I think kids apply just to see if they can get in... an ego thing I would say. But they did schedule her for an interview so she's not been eliminated yet."</p>
<p>I think that it's fine that your D applied if after you've explained your family's financial constraints to her, she's not expecting you to change your mind and somehow pick up all of the costs of a Columbia education.</p>
<p>If she's serious about Columbia and knows about your financial constraints, then IMO she would be working a job now (and yes, that would cut down on her ECs, but that's the price one pays for going for one's dream), and would be researching and carefully applying for every scholarship she remotely qualifies for.</p>
<p>If she's got the stats and ECs to make Columbia a possible option, she has the ability to -- with hard work -- win some good scholarships.</p>
<p>She'd also be willing to take out loans and work up to 60 hours during the summers, and to also work during the school year to afford her dream.</p>
<p>I am not being mean in saying these things. I helped pay for my own college by working every summer starting as a h.s. junior, and working during the school year when I was a h.s. senior and was in college. I also took out loans, and passed on nice vacations that my friends invited me to (and that their parents would have paid for). I was in a middle/upper middle class community and was the only student whom I knew in high school who was working during summers and the school year. My jobs included cleaning someone's house.</p>
<p>My father, incidentally, was a dentist, but claimed he didn't have the money to send me to the college of my choice. I could have gone for free to the second tier private college down the street, but chose not to.</p>
<p>Yeah, meeting an EFC is not usually easy. Our income is around half that of the poster, and it is only that high because I have gone back to work the past two years. We have almost no savings. My husband does have a secure retirement through work, but nothing extravagant by any means. He has been working overtime and 6 days a week to help pay for our sons' college educations, and pretty much every bit of my income goes to the college. We are used to living modestly, so we have not had to cut back, just keep on watching expenses. Our sons have taken out some loans. I took some money out of my life insurance policy to help make college payments a couple times. My son has applied to be an RA, in order to reduce expenses. Where there is a will, there is a way, my mother always used to say. The way may not be exactly what you wanted or expected, but it is still there. I am happy that we can help our sons attend the colleges that provide what they need for the future.</p>
<p>One day, when our second son is done with college (They're on their own for grad school!), we will save up that money that had been going to colleges and take ourselves a trip to Europe to celebrate! Until then, we are content with life on a budget. :)</p>
<p>Emeraldkity points out some of the ways that the students can offset their costs. In our case, we are looking at some expenses we have had for the KIDS that we will not have in the future...and these will offset college expenses to a degree. It makes us feel all the more fortunate....that we can afford these now...and can use the same dollars for some of the college expenses next year.</p>
<ol>
<li>Private music lessons-piano and oboe $160 per month</li>
<li>High School Band trip (annual event it seems)- $185 for five months</li>
<li>Youth Orchestra Trip (that's this year, in the past it has been choir trips)- $2000 per year</li>
<li>Car insurance- $300 per year savings away at school discount</li>
<li>Summer programs (camps or college programs)- $2500-$3000 per summer.</li>
<li>Donations to the school for athletic teams and band- over $500 per year.</li>
<li>Utilities...they have to be less....less laundry, less showers, less computer use, less TV, less lights, less, less less....</li>
<li> Less gasoline use...only 2 cars in use daily instead of 3. Should save $40 per week.</li>
<li>Food...hard to estimate...but no lunches, no dinners, NO SNACKS!!!</li>
<li>Fees for youth orchestra participation- $550 per year.</li>
</ol>
<p>That's about $10K that we will not be paying OUT next year. OK...it's not a lot, but it's something!!! Gotta look at the bright side.</p>
<p>"That's about $10K that we will not be paying OUT next year. OK...it's not a lot, but it's something!!! Gotta look at the bright"</p>
<p>Wow! To me, paying $10,000 for things like summer camp, orchestra trips and and music lessons is a lot of money. The amount of money that you'll be saving will offset what many parents pay for their kids' college costs a year. That's especially true if one doesn't include loan costs.</p>
<p>Yes, Thumper, I fully understand. :)
Reading your list of expenses made me glad that my S quit music lessons despite being talented, stopped playing sports at age 6, eats like a flea, has to be dragged to the store to get clothes, and thinks a great summer is spending time in our hometown with his friends. </p>
<p>As a result, of course, I am dreading the bite that his college expenses will put on us. Fortunately, S is taking a gap year, so we can delay the pain for another year. We will, though, lose the tax deduction, I think. :(</p>
<p>No fees for SAT, SAT II, APs, let alone any review courses. No college application fees. No Prom expenses. Birthday, holliday presents redirected toward what would otherwise be in the college expense column. Clothes might be cheaper.</p>
<p>I have thought about those kinds of savings, too. We didn't have the summer programs, but we probably paid a couple hundred a yr for band trips, and stuff like that.</p>
<p>Our water bill is half what it was when my kids were home. Our electric bill is much lower, too. Much lower gasoline bills.</p>
<p>And food is definitely a hugely lower cost without my S at home!:)</p>
<p>There are just so many day to day expenses that we don't have now; it really does add up!</p>
<p>Well, geez, my son takes TWO and sometimes THREE 30-minute showers a day most days. So, we should be able to finance his college education easily. Of course, his college might charge us a water-usage surcharge after they catch on. :)</p>
<p>One great advantage of having left almost all his worldly goods at Tulane when he was blown away by Katrina is that my son learned to shop at the Salvation Army. Maybe all our kids need to learn how to do that while they're in college, eh? </p>
<p>It IS amazing how little we put in the fridge these days!</p>
<p>By the way, if you go to the US News best college site (<a href="http://www.usnews.com%5B/url%5D">www.usnews.com</a> then click on best colleges), under their toolbox, they have a nice little college costs comparison worksheet. Makes it very simple to lay it all out visually for your children how different colleges will compare in cost after factoring in any merit awards, financial aid, loans you can take, etc.</p>
<p>My daughter is mighty thrifty...but so am I. When she wants something like new black pants...I say....let's check Goodwill (our Goodwill is like a nice boutique...sorted by color AND size) first and if there's nothing there we'll go to the gap. Last time that happened, she found TWO pairs of black pants, a pair of khakis, a sweater, a couple of tee shirts and two purses for about $25!!</p>
<p>That's what I'm talking about! He called me last September from his temporary home at Cornell and said with some trepidation that he'd spent "a lot of money on clothes." Turns out he'd gathered about that much up for around $50, except instead of the purses, he'd found a couple of pairs of shoes and a jacket.</p>
<p>I didn't read all the posts and please don't all flame me but I think it's interesting how accepting most people are that the situation for higher ed in the United States is in some way fair. In Europe and Canada (can't say about Japan) university education is so subsidized that family wealth does not play a major part in where a kid goes to school. It's a fact that a wealthy kid with high stats can go to Columbia and a middle class kid (the majority of kids) can't but I don't think we should defend this as the proper order of things. Also, why is there no economic competition among schools? Why are there no stripped-down, no varsity sports, no fancy excercise facilities, just great academics institutions with way lower prices? I think it's price-fixing.</p>
<p>amazon, I think there is price competition, but I do think that the stripped down U will come to pass. We do have a huge problem with runaway costs.</p>
<p>Our EFC is $27,000 with an income of about 108K (after, sigh, put putting the retirement contributions back in, sigh). It works out as the kid taking loans and working (about $5000), us paying about $13,000 out of pocket, and borrowing about around $9000/year on a home equity line. As others have mentioned, the decrease in home expenses more than offsets the travel to get the kid to and from school (Cleveland-Chicago). Being careful with daily expenses such as dining out makes a big difference. And, no kitchen remodals or major travel for quite some time, no luxury cars. </p>
<p>Unlike the OP, our son is our one and only, so that makes a big difference. Graduate school is less of an issue - the tuition waiver he is not using for undergrad is also ok at grad school where his father works. Both our mortgage and equity line should be paid off, with time to spare, by retirement. </p>
<p>Each family is different and needs to look at the overall picture.</p>
<p>Actually if you are a middle class kid whose parent is willing to pay the EFC, you can go to Columbia or any of a number of very good schools that pledge to meet 100% of need.
If you are a middle class kid with a little lower stats than the Ivies, you can still attend schools that are challenging and offer merit aid as well as need based.
Some of the state schools, as well as some lesser known privates are some of the best bargains around in education.
Instate schools are subsidized by taxpayers, so the cost to the student is much lower than OOS.</p>
<p>After reading this thread, I am having to rethink my position a little on what is a fair amount for the family to contribute to my S college ed. I had been thinking 60K was the right number for us to contribute to 4 years of college, but my S has asked for virtually nothing his entire life! We have 40K saved for him and I was thinking an additional 20K over 4 years would be a little stretch, but okay. Maybe a little more of stretch is in order, if needed. </p>
<p>My brother in law, who is in a similar economic position to us, paid about 60K for each of his 3 kids to attend a state U. But his kids all asked for, and got, a lot more "toys" while they were growing up. If my son had asked for a lot more things over the years, we would probably have less in our retirement account than we have. Because he has always asked for so little, maybe we need to stretch more now, if the need arises. I am so proud of him, I don't want to deny him a chance to go to a highly respected college.</p>
<p>GatorDan, with your attitude and confidence, you've got a great life ahead of you! Best wishes!</p>
<p>Regardless of how "high cost" your state is, you should be able to shake loose a lot more than the ~$1,000 per month for that education that you initially thought you could cough up. You need to think through your whole "cost" structure, your luxury spending (what you really don't need), and your equity situation (home, investments -- even if you don't have much in cash savings). While FAFSA isn't the most sensitive barometer of individual differences in ability to pay, it's probably capturing something real in your case when it's telling you that with $160K gross income and any reasonable equity elsewhere you should be able to come up with $3,500 per month. </p>
<p>Your only apparent special hardship here is that there will be 3 kids to carry though this process. In the "overlap" years, you're likely to qualify for even more aid. Fundamentally, though, I am in agreement with those who are saying you (your daughter) can't necesarily have what you wish for at somebody else's expense. That you didn't save much for this situation isn't anybody else's responsibility.</p>