I don’t think this years discussion has been started yet, so hear goes mine…
We have 2 adult kids, and 1 works in the school system.
The other kid and significant other are worried about spending the holidays with the 1 that works with kids, and that one’s SO (who also has close contact with kids).
I am not sure how we will handle this situation. I want to respect everyone and their COVID concerns. I am hopeful that everyone will have boosters by then, and that the numbers will be trending in the “right” direction, but who knows.
We gave the kid that’s in the school system first “dibs” on Christmas last year (I can’t remember why- maybe we did Thanksgiving with the other), so maybe it would be fair to give the other one first choice this year?
Obviously we have a little time to work this out, but it’s going to be another complicated year for holidays.
What if everyone agrees to do a covid test before you get together for the holidays?
When does school end prior to the gathering? Agree about a quick Covid test prior to the gathering.
It is likely that vaccines for 5-12 year olds will be approved very soon; public health departments are gearing up for this.
What is the basis for Other Kid and SO’s worries? Do they have underlying medical conditions that put them at increased risk?
Also, what is Covid testing policy and outbreak statistics at the school system(s) where the couple works?
I’m not too worried about this issue yet. I am hopeful we will all have boosters and we can go the testing route if we deem it necessary.
I’m sure others on the forum will have holiday issues too.
I’m waiting to see if this comes up in my family. Everyone I would invite is vaxxed (well, not sure about one nephew–if he’s not it’s a no-go), and some have boosters or will. The exception is D’s toddler and baby. We all have concerns that breakthroughs are possible, and some family members are more cautious than others (my brother is anti-mask, for instance, while most of us routinely wear them in stores and other errand type stuff.) I think we will be okay, but I’m not sure if D will have qualms at some point. Her older one goes to pre-school–all teachers vaxed, and mask wearing is common for the kids. H teaches HS–hoping all his students are vaxxed, but probably most aren’t. We are in a a high-vax, low-spread area, which helps.
Further twist is S is living with a probably forever partner now, and we may have to share him. We’ve always had D and her family for holidays, so not having him some of the time will be new for us, and hard to get used to! I am spoiled. But, we told them whatever works for them is fine for us.
I’ve had more complex TG’s in the past, so I’ll work with all this!
Maybe I’m wrong but I don’t have confidence that 20’s and 30’s (year olds) will qualify for boosters by the holidays.
Also would like to mention that even if vaccine is approved for 5-12 year olds before the holidays that does not mean that a majority of kids are going to have them. My son is an urban public school teacher in a K-8 school and the # of kids in junior high who age qualify for a vaccine and actually have one is low. Many populations are not on board with vaccinations.
Family testing prior to getting together is your best shot.
No pun intended…right🙄
On our drive back to AZ from ME, we’re having Thanksgiving with our son and his GF in Georgia. She goes to school and works at a Publix, he works in an office and on base periodically. We’re all vaxxed, no boosters. We don’t have any concerns, just looking forward to good food and a great time together.
We haven’t talked about the holiday plans yet. Last year we did both Turkey Day and Christmas OUR family - H, myself, 3 kids and one spouse and one signficant other. But we did not get together with our usual siblings on my side.
T-Day is usually at my brothers in the town my mom lives. Actually Christmas too. But it’s his wife who is the lone non-vaccinated in the family. 
She is totally fine with us still getting together of course! Cause she is not apparently worried and if we are vaccinated, what should be our worry?!
I’m not someone who needs to plan ahead for this type of thing - the holiday get together. A meal can be put together without days of planning. Of most importance to me will be that my mom gets placed with one of her two kids nearby - me or my brother. It pained me that she was largely alone on Christmas last year…
I am so happy you get to be with him!!!
Is the GF a new development?
We haven’t talked about our plans yet.
In general, on my side of family, gatherings are very small anyway. My parents are eligible for boosters, but have not gotten them yet, and I’m not sure they will (my dad is having a crisis of conscience over taking a a third shot when so much of the world has no access at all. Yes, I know all the reasons why this is not a good reason, and no, I’m not arguing with him over this). That said, gathering at Thanksgiving with them and possibly one other (fully vaxxed) family will not be any different than we’ve been operating since we all got shot #2 back in March.
My H’s family is a little different, I guess. We normally gather the Friday after Thanksgiving (since we all go different directions for Tgiving day) and this year, would most likely have our Chanukah gathering then, too. One of my nieces is not yet eligible for vax (though she did have covid last March). My MIL and FIL have both gotten their 3rd shots, but seem hesitant to gather with all of us. MIL normally would have officially invited everyone by now and there’s been crickets. So…thinking that isn’t happening.
They’ve been together two years next month. He called a couple of weeks ago to tell us she’ll be moving in with him around Christmas. Maybe she’s The One? We met her when we visited in August and like her a lot.
Are cases increasing in the area where the ones who work around kids are? Otherwise my thought would be they’ve been doing something to avoid getting it so far (assuming they have been in person all Fall) it would seem the risk that suddenly they will be infected by a kid just before the holidays should be small. Staying away from others the days between end of school for the holidays and the holidays? Covid tests for all?
We have decided to do a Covid test before we go to my parents home for Thanksgiving. It is our D who is the kindergarten teacher that thought we should all do this.
The short story is that we might be the Thanksgiving outcasts, but have to see what others in the local family are thinking and doing. A relative is going through cancer surgery and therapy so first things first.
I’m going to investigate home tests as Christmas gets closer. Our “problem” people don’t get out of school until very close to the holiday. The rest of us can keep away from others pretty well, but if it’s not too expensive will likely test to be “fair.” (Opinion may change with boosters and looking at numbers as holidays get closer).
D23 and I will be flying from California to the East Coast on the Saturday prior to Thanksgiving. We’ll see one set of grandparents all day Sunday and another set for dinner on Tuesday. Grandparents are in their 80s. The Sunday pair received Moderna and are waiting for the official go-ahead before getting a booster. They’ll need to get their boosters by November 7 to have full protection by the Sunday we’ll see them. The Tuesday pair are in the process of getting their Pfizer boosters.
D23 and I are both vaccinated with Pfizer; my 6-month mark was two weeks ago and hers will be in early December. My current plan is to wait until my doctor or public health authorities say people like me should get a booster.
D23 and I will test using the BINAX at home tests . . . I’m not sure when we should start or how frequently we should test. I have plenty of the tests.
I haven’t figured out the menus yet- but one good thing about Covid if you can call it that is I’m less obsessive about holidays, and much less controlling over who/what/when. Everyone has their own risk tolerance, someone with young kids in school is subject to the school’s rules and protocols, someone undergoing a surgical procedure after the holidays has their own issues, someone who is immuno-compromised might not be comfortable with a plan that works for the rest of us.
So I’m hosting what I’m hosting, everyone but the little kids will be double vaxxed (I assume they won’t be vaccinated by then) and we will have actual meals either outside or in the garage with the double doors open (pretty cold for New England in November and December but I’ve warned people to wear hats and snow boots, etc.) Anyone who is concerned about someone else’s status- they are free to stay home, we will have a do-over in a few weeks (not a full Thanksgiving but a family get-together). You think masks are dumb? Keep it to yourself, wear a mask when you enter my house to go to the bathroom. You think vaccines are for losers? Stay home. You don’t think I should be hosting at all? I won’t be offended if you don’t come.
We’ve done birthdays a month late, welcome new baby parties 5 months late, zoom weddings, private weddings, “We love you but don’t come to our wedding” weddings- it’s all good. If that means I’m still making Thanksgiving in February for the folks who were too worried to show up in November- better than inadvertently giving the cousin going through chemo a breakthrough Covid infection, right?
I agree with this. The host sets the rules, and if people have to send their regrets, that’s okay, they’ll be missed.
For the original poster, I think that’s the same rule. Invite them all, let people know who is coming and let them decide. If your D doesn’t want to be near her brother, that’s a hard choice but it belongs to her. Of course, it’s nice if you can accommodate both either with testing or dinner on separate nights.