Even with the legacy advantage, ND manages to matriculate some of the top students in the country. While visiting the school I met a number of legacy students, and most of them had been admitted to other selective schools (yet chose to attend ND). I might be wrong, but I don’t believe ND compromises on selectivity for legacy.
Current student at ND, just wanted to say that I was pretty much at the middle 50 (more or less, I can’t really remember), and I have no particular “hooks” to speak of, certainly no legacy. I’m also the least athletic person I know, in direct opposition to the tall blonde runners who populate this campus, and although I am Catholic, I was never an active member of my parish back home. I applied regular decision (actually turned in my app 3 days before the deadline, whoops), and I almost didn’t apply just because I felt like I had no chance of getting in, but apparently they saw something in me. I think my essays and the passion I have for what I what to study and do made me stand out, and indeed, since I’ve been here, and I’ve gotten a lot of positive feedback and encouragement from my advisors and my professors. I’m writing this silly comment just to assure you and your daughter that while college admissions can be incredibly daunting, they’re not entirely impossible to navigate – someone eventually does get in to even the most selective schools. I’m going to give you the advice that you specifically said that you didn’t want: if ND is her top choice, she should put her best foot forward and apply here. If she decides that the physics program at Cornell suits her better, she should apply there.
College admissions really don’t have to be a land mine of playing numbers games and obsessing on when and how to apply; after all, we here at Notre Dame save that kind of strategizing for the head football coach. Also, while I don’t have a sibling at ND, I have a sibling at even more selective university, and I am fairly certain that I would not have gotten in there if my sibling was not a student there – all I’m saying is that if her brother goes to Cornell, I would say she has very good chances there, but once again, she shouldn’t feel that Notre Dame is unattainable. I’m only saying that because I thought it was, and if I had followed that feeling, I wouldn’t be here right now, and that would be sad because ND is pretty great.
I really had no hooks when I applied last year. No varsity sports, not a minority, not a legacy, minimal community service compared to others I have seen. I spent a ton of time on my essays and was pretty dedicated to orchestra in highschool, which is what I think got me in. Those essays are definitely extremely important and I think can be made into a hook, especially if writing is a strong point. I spent a ton of time on mine
lastonterias and nicobella, thank you for taking the time to provide your insight. It is helpful and appreciated.
My daughter has made the decision to go all in on Notre Dame REA. It is her number one choice and she is fine tuning her application/essays for November 1st submission. As you both have said, the essays are extremely important and she is really trying to do her best on them.
She doesn’t feel that Notre Dame is unattainable. It was more me trying to understand the admissions, numbers, etc across a number of different schools she is interested in.
Numbers wise she is a solid candidate. 3.78 UW, 4.4 Weighted, 34 C ACT (35, 35, 32, 35), 10 AP’s with good scores. Good EC mix with some leadership (sports, music, etc), good number of volunteer hours, etc.
So she will put her best foot forward and see what happens. Since Notre Dame is where she wants to be, as her father I want that for her. I also think it would be the best school for her. But as a realist I know it is a coin flip.
lastonterias, I had to chuckle at your tall blonde runner comment. If my daughter is accepted she can add some diversity as she is a short blonde runner. 
Thank you both again for providing your perspective.