<p>The question is in the title. If anyone would like to give me some advice I would appreciate it so much. I'm not sure how to tell him I switched my ED2 commitment to another school without coming off as a jerk. Do I explain to him the blunt truth that I switched schools this soon? Or should I come up with a reason like it was a family decision to switch to the RD pool or something? I'm really not sure how to handle this. Thanks for helping if you can</p>
<p>Also, here's my detailed situation if you'd like some insight:
Applied ED1 to a selective NESCAC as a recruited athlete under the impression from the coach that my chances were very high (admissions had given him the okay to recruit me) and it was likely I'd be accepted. Things didn't pan out exactly as i had hoped and I was eventually deferred to ED2. I called the coach a couple times hoping to find an answer to some questions, he promised to talk to admissions and see what's up and call me before the week ended. Never was called back, and he didn't answer my call/voicemail until many weeks later. </p>
<p>I began to doubt my future at this first college, so I switched to ED2 at another selective NESCAC school that I am currently being recruited for. According to the coach at this new NESCAC school it is likely that I will be accepted (I trust him this time, this coach has had 1 on 1 meetings with admissions solely about my application and has proved he's 100% legit). Decisions coming out this monday, and I believe this coach this time.</p>
<p>So today the coach from the first school finally called back and left a voice mail, expressing continued interest but also acknowledged the fact that I switched to regular decision yet still wants me to wait it out. It was too little too late...</p>
<p>Be an adult – call and tell him that you have changed your mind. After all, no commitments were exchanged (and fulfilled on his part.) You haven’t signed a letter of commitment or even gotten a likely letter. Students change their minds all the time. Coaches understand. </p>
<p>Be prepared for a short telephone call. Most coaches, once you aren’t coming, are no longer interested in continuing the relationship or finding out “why?”. (There are notable exceptions…).</p>
<p>I may have misread something but I am not aware of any NESCAC that defers EDI applicants to the EDII pool (deferrals are to RD round).</p>
<p>I would wait to respond to the first coach until you have your acceptance from the EDII NESCAC on Monday. I have known a couple of kids in very similar situations (wonder if it’s the same coach actually - he has a reputation for this) and both worked out as you hope… but…better safe than sorry. Don’t cut ties with EDI coach until you have your acceptance. Then call and let him know. For the “life lesson” a call is better but I honestly don’t think you owe the coach anything so an email would be fine.</p>
<p>yep Anchser and thanks! I remember you from the ED1 thread man, I’m sorry to hear about your results. Did things eventually work out with another team?</p>
<p>I thought I was not completely understanding what you had written - didn’t know that anyone deferred from EDI to EDII. Interesting they do. I hope you get good news on Monday and then you can put a little extra effort in each time you meet the other coach in competition. Good luck.</p>
<p>Hey Twang, did the coach get you an early read? Where he places your application before admissions and they essentially tell him if you will be in or out? Coach at ed#1 sounds fishy.</p>
<p>Do not make ANY phone calls until you have the acceptance in hand, written. Coaches have a lot of pull, but it’s still not a guarantee that you are in. Once you have that acceptance, just let the first coach know you have decided to go elsewhere. They understand, usually.</p>
<p>I agree with MGSM04, SteveMA and rebel11. Wait until you have something to talk about (confirmation from school #2). It is really simple. Call the coach, and tell him you’ve committed to another school that has fully committed to you. You have nothing to be sorry or ashamed about. You’ve done everything you were asked to do. They did not come through and he will know that. Wish him well, and you’ll probably see him next year. Good luck!</p>
<p>If the coach took that much time to get back to you, it shouldn’t be unreasonable for you to take a few days to get back to him. By then you will know where you stand at the second school.</p>
<p>Thank you everyone!! This was the advice and push I was looking for I really appreciate it.</p>
<p>@MHGSM04 haha that was my plan, to dominate every team that turned me down</p>
<p>@Anjintrader Yes I got a pre-read and was given the okay by the admissions team from ED1 school, he even read me their message after it happened. Fishy it was.</p>
<p>@fenwaysouth That line about the commitment is exactly what I will tell him. Thank you!!</p>
<p>Thanks again everyone, especially with the good lucks. I will make sure to wait and hopefully ED2 coach wasn’t lying to me so I can make the phone call.</p>
<p>maybe I don’t see the problem here,if the coach made assertions/promised you something during the recruit process and then reneged on that once you signed/practiced or lost a year of eligibility he would think nothing of it(it’s the business of college sports), so why is it any different if you as a student-athlete says coach on second thoughts I’m not feeling you, the program or the school. </p>
<p>Is this common? That a coach will tell a prospect that s/he is “likely accepted” and they don’t get accepted? My son is talking with 3 coaches now…all three got pre-reads and all three told him that they received “great feedback on his application from admissions”…Is there still a possibility (strong or otherwise) that he won’t be accepted at the schools? I sort of assumed that a coach wouldn’t continue to call and email a recruit with affirmations of how excited they are to see (fill in the blank) in a (fill in the blank) uniform in the fall if they weren’t pretty darn sure that the kid was going to be accepted to the school. Seems very wrong to me.</p>
<p>Congrats! My son was also recruited by Tufts a few years ago. You’re in a good spot, and you couldn’t have gone wrong academically at either.</p>
<p>BTW…The title of this thread should not be “How do I explain to a coach that I changed my mind? " The title should have been how do I deal with a coach/school who can’t commit”</p>
<p>You’ll have a little extra giddy-up when you play the schools that recruited you. Trust me.</p>
<p>JoBenny,</p>
<p>“Great feedback on his applications from admissions” is coach speak. Many of us here speak fluent “coach speak”. It sounds good, but doesn’t tell you much more than your previously knew. There is no specifics, no details, and no committment. You need to find out exactly where your son or daughter sits on their priority list. </p>
<p>Your son/daughter needs to find out if the coach will help with Admissions if it is needed. Every situation is different because everybody’s academic/athletic abilities are different. When it comes to crunch time, coaches will typically have more information to share with you. They will never guarantee anything. If they start “hedging” you know it is time to look at other opportunities you have lined up.</p>
<p>Great news, congratulations! Now make the most of your opportunities and enjoy being a Jumbo!</p>
<p>JoBenny, it does happen more than people want to believe. Research this forum for good advice on asking hard questions and for information on how to read between the lines when speaking to a coach. Go into the process with a healthy skepticism and ask around in your athletic community about the reputations of the coaches with whom your son is speaking.</p>
<p>JoBenny. It happened to my son this fall. Applied ED, had great admissions interview, positive pre-read, full coach support…then denied. Coach himself was very disappointed - we think it may have been a financial aid issue, but will never know for sure. Things may have turned out for the better, though. We are expecting confirmation of some good (actually better) news this week. Things happen for a reason, I guess.</p>