<p>My son is thinking of applying to the HADES prep schools as a sophomore (he is currently finishing up 8th grade ie. a rising 9th grader). As application deadlines are usually mid-Jan and teacher/guiance counselor recommendations are usually sought in late Nov/Dec, please advice if it is better to seek recommendations from his 8th grade teachers/counselor (who have gotten to know him over the past year) or from his 9th grade teachers/counselors who would have only known him for a little over 3 months by the time they write their recommendations. I do note that most application forms seem to require recommendations from "Current" Maths or English teachers.</p>
<p>Lastly, how important are these teacher recommendations to the Admissions Office versus SSAT scores, grades, etc? What if a child does pretty well in a subject like English or Maths, gets decent grades but doesn't get along with his current maths/english teacher?</p>
<p>First of all, I would follow the instructions and use the “current” teachers and not the teachers from the “last complete academic year.” You might consider a supplemental recommendation from one of those teachers…but I wouldn’t chart your own course. Everyone (in this hemisphere) will be in the same boat, getting recommendations from teachers who have only known the student for a couple of months. They’re used to that. And they’ve made the conscious choice to solicit those teachers’ recommendations, presumably because they find them more useful.</p>
<p>I think it’s common to have to obtain a recommendation from one or more teachers with whom a child perceives that s/he is having some sort of conflict. Keep in mind that, from the teacher’s perspective, it’s not typically a big deal. Going in to the coming school year, your child may have had about 12 teachers in his or her lifetime (figuring 1 per year from K-6 and then, say, 5 for 7th grade. That’s the number of students in one small class for a teacher. Multiply that times the number of classes taught each year and again by the number of years in teaching and you’ll see that while the student (and parent) may place significant weight on the teacher interaction, the teacher has been around the block. The conflict would have to be very intense for a teacher to react strongly to it.</p>
<p>Even then, they’re typically professional about it. And your child doesn’t come into their classroom as a blank slate unless you just moved to the school district. There’s a file with test results, report cards, previous teacher comments, etc., that – for better or for worse – will help shape a recommendation and inform the teacher as to what kind of student and person your child is like. You can ask them to speak with the previous year’s teachers if they’re in the same school. You can encourage them to review the file. But most teachers are not going to screw over your child just because s/he talks in class without first raising his or her hand…even if the teacher thinks that’s totally rude.</p>
<p>As for how much weight, relative to other required materials, is assigned to the recommendations…well, that’s a topic for debate in the typically holistic admission processes used by boarding schools. I happen to think they’re weighted very heavily…but I’m even more certain that very astute and wise people here will express compelling reasons why they disagree with me. It doesn’t matter though: you have no control over that. So, if the recommendations are a concern, try to work with the teacher and steer him/her to the information that should be highlighted; make sure other recommendations are strong and positive and cover key areas; consider providing some commentary in your parent statement that, in appropriate ways, clues an admissions committee in to the fact that you would place greater emphasis on other recommendations.</p>
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<p>I think he should make every effort to behave himself. The current teachers write the recommendations. </p>
<p>I agree with D’Yer Maker, in my opinions the teacher recommendations are very important. The boarding schools are admitting students who will live in a boarding community of adults and teens, thus the character issue is important. If a student is rude, arrogant, selfish or not nice, the school would like to know that. </p>
<p>Most schools request recommendations from adults who know the applicant through other subjects or through extracurriculars. So, for example, if his English teacher doesn’t think he hung the moon, a recommendation from his History teacher or Boy Scout leader may help to round out the picture.</p>
<p>Actually - I had a student in that situation where the school admitted the fault was with the teacher and not the student. The student was offered an opportunity to transfer out and chose not to. I explained the situation in my interview report (after I followed up).</p>
<p>So - in that case - I would “supplement” the application with an additional letter of reference from the previous year’s teacher.</p>
<p>Schools are looking to see if the student is bright, capable of doing the work, handles him/herself well in a conflict, and is generally self managing. They understand conflicts arise. It is how the student (not the parent) handles it and addresses it with the Adcom to make them aware that will determine success or not. If the majority of recommendations are at odds with the one from a problematic teacher, the school will consider it as a personality conflict.</p>
<p>Several CC students have been in similar situations and overcame it to find spots at amazing schools.</p>
<p>I think recs are very important. I’ll share with you what I witnessed this year with one of my son’s classmates. Both boys, son and classmate, are multi sport varsity players. Both had straight A report cards. Both sang in choir and had leading roles on stage. FA was not a factor. Both applied to almost the same schools. Son got in all his schools and WL on one. Classmate had a bad habit to talk back and argue with teachers. Classmate was denied all schools except one where his sibling attends. I can’t help but think his recs were not so flowery.
I suggest you get your current schools councilor on board with you right away. Make a point to meet with new Math and English teachers in September to let them know your plans. Son should pay attention to assignments handed in on time and never being tardy for those classes. Being a model student, no matter how difficult the teacher, will help.
Many parents on CC have expressed worry about school recs. We were worried that our school was upset about us leaving their school. Our game plan was to try to get them on board with us. It can be a bit tricky.</p>
<p>personally I think teacher recommendations are very important. Particularly for those who apply top BS. Most of kids have outstanding test score/academic report/ECs. However, Teacher recommendations is the only thing student/parent can’t make up/control by themself.
I happened to know a music teacher ( by chatting with her after lessons ) was asked to write recommendations by several students last year. She used to include all awards student got and decribed how well/talent level for those kids. However, She mentioned that she wrote something special for a student who impressed her. She is not a best talent student in the group. but that student always helped her stand partner during and after practice and asked teacher if other members need to help, such and such show her great personality. Guess what, that kid is the only one got in all schools she applied.
I guess if Adcom need to pick few from the same qualified kids. Teacher recommendations is the best source to tell/describe which students are fit.</p>
<p>Thank you all for responding to my thread. I really appreciate your putting things into perspective (D’yer Maker, Periwinkle and ExieMITAlum) and sharing your own experiences (bluegene and muf123). Fortunately, for us, it is not that he is misbehaving or rude in class but I think it is more a case of being a little intimidated by this particular teacher. I don’t expect a bad recommendation but just don’t think that it will be a glowing one. Having read some of the threads in Prep School Chances, I am somewhat overwhelmed by how intense the competition is to get into these schools! I guess if I was sitting on the other side of the table, I can see why the teacher recommendations would be an important part of the application review process and it is comforting to hear that one less than glowing recommendation should not hurt his candidacy.</p>
<p>Would your son be more intimidated than the other students would be intimidated by this teacher? If she is intimidating to students generally, it shouldn’t be a problem unless (a) she is directing it specifically toward your son, or (b) he melts and crumbles more than others when faced with an intimidating teacher.</p>
<p>An intimidating teacher sees all students as cowering puddles of mush, afraid to take academic risks and fearful of volunteering to participate in class. (Yes, that’s an extreme, devoid of all nuance, but my point is that she will still be operating from the norms that she perceives and she won’t be comparing your son’s demeanor with her against your son’s demeanor in other classrooms where she’s not present.) So if there’s nothing unique or distinctive about the relationship your son will have with this teacher, you need not be concerned about the impact of that dynamic on the recommendation.</p>
<p>We’re talking about a teacher he will have next year, right? One that he hasn’t spent time with yet? That’s even more reason not to worry. Your son will figure out things for himself. Right now he’s anticipating a relationship with this teacher based mostly on other people’s perceptions and experiences. What’s more, things happen over the summer. She may find a new job; the school may shuffle the faculty around…who knows?</p>
<p>If I may mix my cliches, you’re going to have to burn this bridge when you get to it.</p>
<p>(Note: I didn’t see where you disclosed the gender of the teacher, so I just chose female to avoid clunky “him/her,” “s/he,” “his/her” references and because there would be no confusion as to when I was referring to the teacher or your son.)</p>
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<p>Don’t ever, ever read the Chances thread. It’s idiotic.</p>
<p>I’m probably being naive lemonade1 but when you say that the Prep School Chances is “idiotic”, do you mean that the whole admissions process is too much of a black box for anyone on the outside to offer any meaningful advice or do you mean that often the information shared by these prospective applicants are fictitious?</p>
<p>The Chances thread has kids without true insight making predictions that sound very authoritative but are not. (I only have looked at it once or twice, but the whole premise is wrong to me.) There may be exaggerations of accomplishments as well. On the other hand, you can get very good advice from people who have been through the process (for example, the responses here.) Also, a wonderful admissions officer called GemmaV has great advice. You can search for her postings instead of getting anxious reading the Chances thread!</p>
<p>Chances threads. Idiotic may be too harsh. In polite terms: It’s people without the necessary wisdom, knowledge or insights seeking the necessary wisdom, knowledge and insights from people who don’t have the necessary wisdom, knowledge or insights. In succinct terms: it’s the blind leading the blind.</p>
<p>tacticalmom, most of the participants on Chances threads are 13 or 14. They exaggerate accomplishments. There’s a chances forum bias against being “mean,” which translates to suggesting anything other than, “oh, you’re a shoo-in.”</p>
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<p>Thanks for clarifying lemonade1. I see where you’re all coming from and really appreciate the candour and sensibilities that you’ve all displayed. I came across this forum quite by accident but it has been an eye opener…thank you!</p>