<p>Since I can't do any "college search" questions without actually running some numbers on NPCs, I've tried to ask my parents to go to the collegeboard website or a college's site and run the numbers. But when I ask them they become a bit quiet, shy away from the topic, and say that they'll do it later. Basically, they're kinda avoiding the situation. I dunno why - maybe they're too lazy to plug in all the numbers, maybe they didn't have their tax return, idk. But I'm at a loss of what to do. How can I push my parents to suck it up and run the numbers so I could actually construct an affordable list?</p>
<p>Many parents are just plain embarrassed to tell their kids the truth: they don’t have much money available for college. Lots of families have absolutely no college savings. We didn’t.</p>
<p>They aren’t bad or neglectful parents, they are just human. Instead of starting with the NPC, start by asking them separately what they think the family can afford to pay. Talk with each of them about what you have read about keeping your loans within the Stafford limits. Ask each of them how they feel about you working while you are in school, and how much they expect you to earn. Don’t be surprised if they have very different ideas about this.</p>
<p>Then do what you can to help them come to consensus. Hint: if one parent thinks they can pay a lot less than the other, use that figure for your budget estimates. Once you have an understanding of what your familycan come up with that is the time to run the NPCs and the FAFSA calculators. If you are like most students, the calculators will show a much bigger family contribution than your family can actually afford. Bring soothing adult beverages and very soft tissues to that meeting as the numbers can be truly shocking. (Our FAFSA EFC is nearly four times what we can pay.)</p>
<p>But if you have done your homework after your initial conversations with your parents, you will have identified one or moe institutions that are affordable for your family. Before the can flip out completely, show them the numbers for Affordable College/University even if it is you commuting distance community college or a far away place that guarantees you a huge merit-based scholarship. They need to know that you can get an education somewhere on your budget.</p>
<p>Wishing you all the best!</p>
<p>It also wouldn’t hurt to preface the discussion by letting them know that while college is in your plans, you understand that it is incredibly expensive and you want to work with them to find an answer (in terms of school, fin’l aid, scholarships) that will be do-able for the whole family. You can let them know you don’t expect them to foot the entire bill and that getting a head start can really help the process.</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>When making the safety part of your application list, make the pessimistic assumption that their ability and willingness to contribute will be far short of what the financial aid system calculates your EFC (expected family contribution) to be.</p>
<p>If your stats are high enough, some of the large merit for stats schools may be safety candidates: <a href=“http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/financial-aid-scholarships/1348012-automatic-full-tuition-full-ride-scholarships.html[/url]”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/financial-aid-scholarships/1348012-automatic-full-tuition-full-ride-scholarships.html</a></p>
<p>In the non-safety part of your application list, look for competitive large merit scholarships that you may have a good chance to get.</p>
<p>Also consider whether starting at community college for two years can save money and minimize debt.</p>
<p>I can think of two approaches:</p>
<ol>
<li>“Mom? Dad? I’ve started researching colleges and it’s pretty scary how much some of these places cost. All of them say they give financial aid but the amount they give seems to be all over the place. But they all ask is you guys have filled out the EFC calculator. I don’t want to waste any time or get worked up about a school if we can’t afford it. Can you please fill out this form?”</li>
</ol>
<p>or</p>
<ol>
<li>“Mom? Dad? I need $250,000.”</li>
</ol>
<p>I suspect one or both will get a reaction.</p>
<p>Based on other posts, it seems that many parents’ reaction will be to try to avoid the subject, or (worse) promise something that that they cannot deliver (“we’ll make it work out” – then in April tell the student that nowhere they got in can be attended without a huge amount of debt).</p>
<p>I agree with much of the above.</p>
<p>First, ask them how much they think they can pay each year. If you have 2 married parents, ask them when both are together to get an agreed upon answer. </p>
<p>Explain to your parents that it is VERY important that you have this info, since you can only apply to a limited number of schools, and therefore you don’t want to waste time and application money on schools that will not be affordable. </p>
<p>In cases like yours, you also should assume that your parents are hesitant because they aren’t prepared to pay much for college. They may not be able to pay anything. It’s not unusual for many families to have little to nothing leftover each month to put towards college. </p>
<p>If a family doesn’t have college savings, then even coming up with $5,000 a year can mean finding $500 extra dollars each month to put towards a 10 month payment plan. For many families, that is just not possible. </p>
<p>I agree with UCB, look at the threads for large scholarships for stats. </p>
<p>What are your test scores and GPA?</p>
<p>Edited to add…</p>
<p>I see that you’re looking at schools like G’town and ND. That probably means that you have good stats…maybe good enough for large merit elsewhere. </p>
<p>Your parents may be aware of how expensive G’town and ND are…running about $60k per year…and they may think/know that they won’t qualify for enough FA so that those schools would be affordable. As long as you have a few financial safety schools in your pocket, if ND or G’town aren’t affordable, you’ll still have options.</p>
<p>Thanks a bunch, guys. I recently talked to my parents about if they had any money to save for college; they didn’t 
but I thought that was expected since they don’t have a lot of money leftover after paying for my and my brother’s schools (I’m already on fin aid for my high school). It confuses me, though, because they make 130K a year. Still, my school wouldn’t have given us financial aid if they thought we could afford full price (which we can’t).</p>
<p>You guys are great. Thanks a lot!</p>
<p>the convo we had (I’m a parent) was around the annual “net” cost . . . for us it had to start with a “2” (i.e., < 30k a year)</p>
<p>so the deal was to find colleges to apply to that were likely to give BOTH need-based aid (at 130k per year your parents are probably eligible) AND non-need based aid ( e.g., scholarships for academics or athletics or other specifc factor)</p>
<p>there are stats available decsribing different schools’ and their % of incoming kids that get non-need-based aid and how much . . . your willingness to go to school in non-coastal America helps, too</p>
<p>just like clothes: NEVER pay full price :-)</p>
<p>Thanks a bunch, guys. I recently talked to my parents about if they had any money to save for college; they didn’t but I thought that was expected since they don’t have a lot of money leftover after paying for my and my brother’s schools (I’m already on fin aid for my high school). It confuses me, though, because they make 130K a year. Still, my school wouldn’t have given us financial aid if they thought we could afford full price (which we can’t).</p>
<p>FA for high school is MUCH different than FA for college. You can’t conclude that because a high school is giving you FA that a college will. NO.</p>
<p>You attend a Catholic school. It’s not unusual for Catholic schools to give FA (or tuition discount) when you have multiple children in the school. </p>
<p>With an income of $130k, your family’s “expected family contribution” will likely be about $35k-40k per year for college. It could be MORE at schools that don’t meet need. </p>
<p>That amount is probably MORE than what your parents are paying for 2 in a Catholic high school. How much is the tuition at your high school, and how much do your parents pay for each child to attend? </p>
<p>If paying $35k-40k per year is not affordable, then are only a FEW ways to get that cost down to a lower level:</p>
<p>1) Get accepted to one of the very, very few schools that give “super aid”…HYPS. A school like Harvard will expect your family to pay about $13k - 15k per year.</p>
<p>2) Attend a school that will give you HUGE merit for your stats…so that your remaining costs are an amount your parents will pay.</p>
<p>3) Attend a school that has a COA that your parents can pay.</p>
<p>4) Commute to a local state school.</p>
<p>“How much is the tuition at your high school, and how much do your parents pay for each child to attend?” </p>
<p>Tuition: $15k
How much my parents pay for each child: 7k (me), 6k (my brother)</p>
<p>btw, my brother isn’t in high school, so I’m not getting a discount for having a sibling attend the same school.</p>
<p>If what you said is true, then my options are VERY limited.</p>
<p>As someone who is very familiar with Catholic schools in several states, it is very unusual that your family was given such a fab discount for 2 kids in Catholic schools with that income. So, please do NOT use that as any kind of guideline as to what a college would charge your family. </p>
<p>The only way I can see a college charging you about $7k (or a little more) is if you go to a school with a HUGE merit scholarship…like more than full tuition. None of the schools that you’re considering would work.</p>
<p>Your posts suggest that your family can’t pay much more than they’re currently paying for high school. that will be an issue.</p>
<p>the best solution is for you to ask if your parents can pay AT LEAST $10k per year for college, and then look at schools that award AT LEAST full tuition scholarships. Then a small fed student loan can cover anything left over.</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>Make sure your parents know how NPCs work. Colleges were made to use NPCs because there prices are deceptively high. Many students end up getting discounts (although, admittedly, your parents do make a lot of money.)</p>
<p>The cheaper option would be to go to a public university. And even cheaper than that would be to go to community college, and then transfer. It might be worthwhile to run these options with your parents and see how they react to them. If they feel relieved to hear you say that, you might have to end up taking the public option.</p>
<p>But again, make sure to utilize NPCs. Only then can you truly inform your parents how much they’d be expected to pay. And be sure to ask them how much they think they can contribute to your education.</p>