<p>My parents have never been overly supportive of me when it comes to college. Of course, they love me and want me to do well, but they see this college search differently than I do. They are dead set on me going to my safety school because they don't want me to leave the state. But I have much better options out of state! Because of this, whenever we try to talk about how we are going to pay for it all, they don't give an answer. We have no money saved up, and are going to receive little to no financial aid. I just need a number to work around!!!</p>
<p>How do you guys talk to your parents about this issue?</p>
<p>Not at all. We are upper middle class, but putting out an extra 20k a year is pretty much impossible. Especially with my brother, who won’t receive as much merit aid, going off in 2 years.</p>
<p>I’m actually still trying to figure this out myself. I’m a junior, but my parents have never calculated our EFC or talked numbers with me, and have pretty much decided that I’m going to our state college when I know I could get good aid out of state. I will also definitely be applying EA and it would be fabulous to know what’s going on with our finances. So…I was thinking of drawing up a spreadsheet and confronting them with raw data? I know my parents tend to take me more seriously and hold up their end of the deal if I’ve done some research and know the facts. I don’t know if yours would react the same way, but it’s worth a try.</p>
<p>It is pretty challenging to draw up a useful spreadsheet if you don’t have net price calculator results. Although if you have schools that offer merit aid on your list where your stats are in the top 25%, you could show those costs with possible merit aid. </p>
<p>You might ask your parents to run the net price calculator on your “safety” school, and a couple of other schools you are interested in while you are at it. Plus… when your brother goes, if you are both in college at once you could get more aid. Your parents might be surprised, we got more aid than I expected last year.</p>
<p>They know I have done all the research I can, I have chosen and been accepted to all schools that I have applied to, talked to them about what I’m looking for in a school, etc. and when I ask if we can do an NPC they say “Okay get it started and we’ll see if we can do it tonight.” But you know how that goes. </p>
<p>My biggest fear is that I will visit the OOS schools I’m interested in and fall in love with one, but be left on my own financially since it’s not the one they want me to go too.</p>
<p>My parents refuse to discuss the fact that my in state safety school offers no need based aid, and the only merit aid they give is to a select few students- which will be receiving a whooping $2500. That leaves a lot to be paid for by me/ my family. OOS schools that I would prefer over my state flagship offer good merit aid and many even meet full need. This would led to a much lower OOS cost, but my parents still insist that the flagship would be cheaper and want me to go there.</p>
<p>OP: I’m in the EXACT position as you. I also have a lot of siblings that will be heading off to college soon-ish, and so whenever I try to talk to my parents about how much they’ve saved, they just change the topic. They want me to do well, of course, but it’s really problematic that they’re not willing to talk about it AT ALL. They’re all like “Just get good SAT scores!”. Nothing else. I know I need to do college visits and stuff, but they won’t talk to me about anything. </p>
<p>@justacitygirl: I really love your suggestion, and I think I’m going to try it out. Hopefully my parents seeing me get serious will push them to get serious as well.</p>
<p>Also, I’m going to get a job as soon as I turn 16. My parents don’t really want me to get one, but I’m going to, because I definitely need every penny that I can get, since their savings aren’t substantial. =P</p>
<p>The safety isn’t a bad option. I was encouraged into it by my parents, I actually love where it puts me despite getting criticized by “prestige showers”. It depends a lot on your major, circumstances, AP credits, etc. (No financial aid at all for a middle class income, but like you, certainly cannot afford to go to a more expensive “better” school.)</p>
<p>People that were pushed hard to do well in high school generally don’t head for the safety schools which is meh… Going into not job secure majors at a high cost university isn’t the wisest thing to do! When it can well be the opposite with a job secure, well paying major where you can abuse the heck out of AP credits and get mass advanced standing, save tens of thousands of dollars, get personal professor attention / practical over theoretical (meaning hire you because the theoretical engineers need a year of training before they can work) education, and cakewalk over your competition to a very high GPA because all the “smart” people went away :)</p>