“We would love for her to have a narrowed down list of schools”
- I created such a list for my D. It had very few schools but contained tons of information for each, my spreadsheet did not fit printing on one page. I did it for fun, I knew exactly what D’s is looking for and all her criteria for choosing. I did it for personal fun and it took me about 2 years to compile. When time come to apply, I told her that I have a list, but she did not have to use. She got interested and loved it. She ended up attending her #2 from my list. She love it so much that based on this experience, she asked me later to compile a list of Medical Schools to apply, This second project was so much easier and was accomplished in about 30 min. D. was thankful again.
This was my approach. I do not know the dynamics of your family to suggest anything specific in your case.
Other than that, we were not involved, except later driving her for out of town interviews. D. also took the PSAT “cold”, did not get a high score and did not care to re-take it. Her ACT score and GPA were good enough to have couple very high Merit based offers, one from public and one from private, that happened to be her #1 and #2 on a list. As I mentioned, she ended up attending her #2 - in-state public on full tuition Merit award. Actually, during her application cycle, we encounter only one school that was using NMF status for decision making in regard to acceptance and Merit award. So, I am glad that my kid did not spend any time preparing for her PSAT.
Best wishes!