I don’t know where to post this but need advice to help ds know what to do.
Admitted EA
Got personal card from admissions officer
Got a little swag
Now an email from a Professor in the department he is interested in. I doubt ds is the only recipient of this email.
I think if he gets into other targets and reaches he would probably choose them over this one (I like it more than he does).
Does he need to reply to the very kind email from the professor? He invited DS to zoom or email if he wants to ask about the department or school in general. He also wrote a bit about the department, school and city.
Like I said, DS is lukewarm about this school for now. How do you think he should reply? Or not?
I agree that a short and sweet “thank you” would be appropriate. No reason to burn bridges if this school might still be a possibility. Maybe you should encourage your son to take the professor up on his offer (even just email some questions if he feels more comfortable with that). It may pique his interest a little more. Sounds like the are definitely trying to woo him…and who wouldn’t like that?!
You know…I would have your son respond positively. This school could very well end up at the top of his acceptances…and getting more info about it isn’t a bad idea.
Agree with others….doesn’t have to be a long drawn out response.
If he feels comfortable talking with the professor on Zoom or however it is good practice for an interview with another school he may be even more interested in.
My D22 has made her decision and I am having a hard time knowing how to advise her about some of the reaching out that other schools she has been admitted to are doing. I hate to completely burn bridges with them and tell them no, but she has definitely decided and committed (we sent in the deposit). I fully anticipate that she will stick with her decision (she only seems more and more committed every day), but I just like to have some other acceptances as a little insurance in case something could happen. (I mean who knows after the past several years, right?)
Sure - for next time, he can personalize it a bit better - I look forward to learning more about Miami of Ohio, etc.
Nonetheless, this is just an assignment for the people who wrote. They wrote many I assure you and there is no benefit or detriment for writing or not writing.
So the short and sweet like you did is fine. It’s not going to matter - but it will give you peace of mind!!!
I agree - but you are under no obligation to say no on May 1st.
And you won’t burn any bridges. People there don’t know you other than you’re on a file of kids they’re trying to get.
And depending on the school, 50-90% of kids like your daughter are going to say no. So no one is offended.
But I do agree, short of being an ED admit, waiting until you’re comfortable.
Some say it’s wrong - if you know you’re not going - because others can come off the waitlist. But that’s not your concern per se even though we all want to be nice. You have til May 1st - and there is nothing wrong with using that date. Heck, I bet some don’t even respond - they just let May 1 pass, etc.
For my daughter, on April 1st, we started declining 14 of her 17 spots but like you I was a bit cautious and we held onto 3 until the last week. Her school and her #2 and #3. Technically we held onto #4. She, nor I could figure out how to tell Arizona no - and they kept emailing her all summer about coming even though she emailed them twice to say she was going elsewhere.
You are right to hold on - because you don’t know what happens. Let’s say it’s Tulane and they get devastated by a flood. Or it’s an expensive private and all of a sudden covid gets ugly again and you don’t want to pay $75K for a year of zoom and being locked in a dorm room - so it’s smart to cover yourself against “what ifs”. …after all you paid to apply with the May 1 deadline - so use it.
Good luck - unless you are worried for a jinx, let us know where’s planning to go.
She will be going to Warren Wilson, a pretty unconventional work college.
She and I do know some of the folks at the other colleges, especially one in particular, because she did a summer program there, but she’s pretty committed to Warren Wilson. She’s doing an admitted students day next month and I think we might decline the other acceptances then if they are still emailing us every day. She already declined one because the college called her and put her on the spot.
I personally think it is selfish to hold on to a number of slots in case there is some unforeseen crazy event just so they can quell their anxiety. But that’s me and mine. We’ve been on the other side of a wait list and know that there are real people who are waiting. Ethically and morally, we’d never support that.
My kid has been accepted to several schools. One acceptance is one that many would love to have. Happy to give it up as soon as there is one that is a better fit.
The last few years have been crazy, and kids are applying to many more schools than ever before which means that they can only attend one. We raise our kids to think about the best fit for them and also to be kind to others. To each their own. Many need to wait to May 1st to compare FA offers etc. but if they don’t and are intentionally holding on to slots, I think that’s unethical. I think many parents with kids on waiting lists would agree.
No issues with your methodology. As I said, we gave the rejections April 1st when she 100% knew.
My point is simply - contractually - you have until May 1st. Kids informed off WL after May 1st have to decide to accept the WL and tell the school they accepted to they aren’t coming or more likely, they are excited about their acceptance and turn down the WL acceptance.
It’s just, right or wrong, how the system is set up.
I won’t shame anyone for following the rules and waiting til May 1st if that’s what they want. In fact, they simply need to accept by then, not turn down and that’s fine too if they simply let the deadline pass.
But I won’t shame kids like my daughter who told the bulk early but held onto a few. Or kids who hold onto all until the deadline.
And I won’t disagree with telling everyone as soon as you know…
It’s a personal decision when to inform (other than on ED) and I won’t provide judgement no matter what anyone does as long as they follow the rules. That’s the agreement you made when you applied.
On the one hand, I agree with you, why take up spots you’ll never use?
On the other hand, at this point colleges are not going to their wait list. There’s no correlation between someone turning down a spot now, and another student getting in off the wait list. What’s happening now is yield. Virtually all schools do not enroll a sizeable chunk of kids they admit. So many, many, many more kids have to decline spots before the wait list even enters the picture.
Bottom line: right now the OP shouldn’t feel bad about holding on to more than one acceptance.