HS Junior Year is Stressing Me Out Too Much

Parents Forum
1

Hi all. So I need opinions from adults. I’m not exactly sure where this is gonna go, but it’s probably gonna be very long. If you can offer any advice on any of these situations, please do.

My junior year has been pretty rough. I’m usually a straight A student, but this year I have two Bs, and one B-. A large reason for this is because second quarter I decided to take the ACT, which ended up being a bad idea. As I have low vision, my eyes get tried very easily. I litterally couldn’t do homework for three weeks. Even if I used a screen reader, it was impossible to acutally write my anwsers out, and there was no one at home to scribe for me. (I had to take the ACT over a period of 3 weeks for extended time purposes.) Then, when I planned on catching up on hw over Thanksgiving Break, my computer broke and I didn’t have it for two and a half weeks. Since I cannot drive to the library, I just would use my sisters computer after she was done, but this often meant I would be waiting until 7 pm to do homework. Only one of my teachers understood this, and as a result, the only score that actually reflects what I know in their class is that class, because my grades were low due to getting F’s on homework I couldn’t get in on time.

On the bright side, I got a 28 ACT with no studying (but will need to retake because my lowest score was the one I want to major in.)

Another big stessor is my family life. It’s not exactly stable; my mom works at a very low paying job for many hours. This leaves her very stressed out, and she often resorts to drinking to relive this stress. Well, people who drink obviously can’t think straight, so my mom yells at us a lot. It doesn’t help that she prefers her boyfriend over her own children. When she’s not with her boyfriend or drinking, she’s fine, but that is maybe only once a week.

Thirdly, I have a problem with a teacher. My second quarter I was not able to turn everything in on time in her class. Well two weeks before everything was due, she started yelling at me in the middle of class about how I’m not getting any work done, and just socializing, saying I’m going to get an F in her class. (lol it was funny, because even with all of those assignments not turned in, I still had a C average because of the weighted tests.) Anyway, I didn’t feel like telling her about everything (plus you should NEVER talk back to someone when they are that mad.) It also really sucks because I would like help (it’s my worst class, I just don’t understand it very well), but I am too scared to ask her questions now. She didn’t talk to me for like two weeks after that incident. I am slower at turning stuff in, because the class is one I have in the afternoon, and my eyes are very tired then. I used to be really extroverted and anwser questions, be cheerful. Now when I go to that class, I get bad anxiety and literally slow down in the halls so I get there later. I don’t really talk to anyone, and I just keep to myself. For reference, this teacher has been known to be kind of rude. However, she is the only one that teaches this class, and since I’m interested in the subject, I can’t drop because of the teacher.

Lastly, I am getting pressure from my family about my grades. They keep telling me, “you have to bring your grades back up, bla bla bla. Getting into college is competitive now, you won’t be able to get into a good college with your grades. You need to retake the ACT so you can get in the 30s.” This is also stressing me out big time. I understand that our family is low income and I need to get good grades so I can get merit $, however repeatedly telling me this over and over again will not help. I would like a tutor, but that’s too expensive, and my school doesn’t do free tutoring anymore. If I need to pay for my own tutor, I guess I’m gonna have to resort to that.

I haven’t shown up to any extracurricular meetings this second semester because I’ve been unmotivated to go. I overall just feel unmotivated now. It feels like senioritius, but I’m not a senior. I don’t like to go to school anymore. And I don’t think colleges factor in senior year GPA for admissions purposes, so I guess I’m screwed there lol.

I just need advice over any of these things, or just advice in general. Thanks.

2

Do you have a 504 plan? If so, who at your school is resonsible for getting the teachers to recognize and follow it? Go meet with that person, and ask for a formal conference with the cranky teacher to review your acommodations. Perhaps resceduling that class for a morning period could be arranged so you have more energy.

3

@happymomof1 I do have a 504, but this class is literally only offered once, which happens to be in the afternoon. :confused: So no luck there.

4

Then do ask your team to meet with you and the teacher so that you can sort through the accommodations that you need in order to perform well in that class.

One thing for you to consider, is that the teacher has high expectations for you, and simply flipped out because you weren’t working up to your usual level. Especially as you had a C grade at the time, and the teacher referred to your possible failure.

Also, make sure that your team knows when your computer dies. Someone at the school might be able to get you a computer to use because you need that screen reader to complete your homework. Your team might also want to meet with your sister about sharing her computer. If she’s doing homework, that is one thing, but if she’s on facebook, that’s another. What would she have expected from you had her computer broken?

5

I am so sorry about all this. I think you need an advocate. Can you print this post out and take it to a friendly person on your team, or even the principal? School nurse? Guidance counselor? Is there someone in the school who knows you and who could help you with the teacher, the computer issue, and accommodations in general?

There are many schools that do not require or emphasize standardized tests. http://fairtest.org/university/optional That said some of them do require tests for merit aid. Still, check it out because it seems the ACT caused a lot of problems in your life due to your vision issues.

Would you be disappointed to go to community college for the first year or two? I only say that because one of mine did that due to a medical condition and then went on to a great college with aid and with accommodations later on. Your grades are still pretty good- you are amazing- but just to take the stress off consider this path.

There is a lot of unfairness to your situation. Some of us can relate in one way or the other and would love to help you more, but I think a person in your actual school would be the best. Or you could try to get an advocate. In our state there are organizations that provide them for free, not sure about where you are.

You are supposed to be playing on a level field, so to speak, with your accommodations, but your situation is far from level.

6

Although I do feel like going to the guidance counselor would help, I’m not sure it’s going to help the teacher situation. I would love to say something anonymously, but because there is only one class, I know she’ll know it’s me, and I really don’t want to cause drama that will make me even more nervous of her. Out of all of the students in her class, I know she doesn’t like me the most by the way she treats me.

And I (unfortunately) cannot fix my grades for semester. It would have been nice if I was able to get all those missing assignments in, but I just couldn’t. And this is supposedly the year colleges most look at. :confused:

I did get a nice scholarship to a branch campus of a college in my state through extracurriculars last year, but it’s in a very bad part of town (lots of drug stuff is going on over there, and there’s a prison), so I’m probably not going to consider it an option. A lot of areas around me do not have good bus programs, which really sucks, and is something I need, considering I can’t drive; even if the colleges were in good areas.

I wonder if I could ask my guidance counselor about mentioning what happened this year in my college rec. It sounds like making excuses though (which I really don’t want to, but it’s something that really affected my grades.)

Something I did not mention is that I did have to drop a class second quarter because of being way too behind. It will show up on my transcript as a C-, although I don’t think it factors into my GPA.

The last time I tried talking to a guidance counselor about being bullied at school in HS, I got really nervous and made some lame excuse (they were asking why I wanted to quit a program I was doing so well in, and that was the big reason why I didn’t want to do it the next year.) I do really trust one of my teachers I have this year (more than my GC), but I’m not sure I would like to reveal that personal info, given that there’s no day I can talk to her alone. @compmom

7

Do you have a 504 plan or an IEP? You maybe should have extensions on those assignments- extra time. I think you need an advocate. I wish there was an adult you feel you could trust.

8

I think you should definitely talk with the guidance counselor. Because you said your mom drinks and sometimes yells and has her boyfriend, it might become important for you to go away to college so you have more stability for your studies. Your GC might be able to help you identify which schools you might have a chance at for scholarships and she might be willing to help spearhead or at least coordinate with your 504 team to make sure you’re on track grade-wise and that could include talking to various teachers to remind them of your need for accommodations. Also, you might want to put aside studying for the ACT again until this summer so it won’t interfere with your grades.