HumEc Essay - Please critique!

Would anyone be interested in critiquing my essay for the College of Human Ecology?

I would definitely offer to do so, but I’m also applying to the CHE. Personally, I wouldn’t mind sharing my own essay since they’re so individual, but… If you need an eye, just PM me. Take care!

I wouldn’t trust other people with your essay.

Just a suggestion, if you’re wary about sharing your entire essay with someone, you could always share the bits of it the you feel the most iffy about.
I personally wouldn’t worry about plagiarism since that essay prompt in particular reflects upon your individual activities and how they contributed to your choosing of the CHE. Unless you made a very generic text, which would work against you, OP Doesn’t have much reason to be too mistrustful, especially when sharing the essay with another university or even Cornell college applicant.

Just general advice though, really focus on answering every part of the essay prompt. I know that at some points, your artistic flair may take over and it’s easy to get caught up in embellishing ones own experiences and how important they are, but make sure you explicitly stated how they lead you to choose CHE and how your major will affect your life afterwards.

Bump. Anyone else wanna give it a try?