<p>I recently found out that college probably isn't in the cards for me, for a combination of personal/financial/family reasons. </p>
<p>I'm having a hard time dealing with that fact. Maybe TV and the movies have brainwashed me because I feel like college (if chosen wisely) is this magical experience that I'll always wish I had and always be trying to make up for. </p>
<p>The thing is, I don't need a degree for my chosen profession (or even my plan B or C) so it's not the "not getting a degree" that I lament. It's just the experience. Students living together, learning together, having a community, getting to explore interests and activities, traditions, identity...I don't know where I'm going to get those things I crave without college. </p>
<p>Need some advice on how to move past this mindset. Thanks.</p>
<p>Keep in mind that the “college experience” isn’t even the same for all who DO go to college! My H never lived in a dorm, for example. My ex had friends in college but didn’t attend a single sporting event or typical college experience stuff like clubs and frats. My sister was IN a sorority-I never set foot in one. I could go on. What you do with your life is what you make of it.</p>
<p>If you want to take classes at a CC-do that-they’re cheaper than 4 year colleges in most states. Many offer specialized certificates that might actually suit your goals better. I don’t know your plans, so I can’t say for sure. But that’s what my S did-and he’s doing fine. He was never the type who’d have bought into the “experience” thing anyway.</p>
<p>If you really, really want to go to college-work toward that goal. There are ways to afford it, even if it won’t be the tippy top elite schools you see all over these forums. You can still get a decent education. </p>
<p>Whatever you do-do it for YOU, not some ideal that doesn’t exist. Good luck!</p>
<p>Have you taken the SAT or ACT? Those test are purported to reflect upon one’s “likelihood of success” at college. Not much more than a dta point, but the results might be useful.</p>
<p>What is your planned career? Are you sure you don’t need to go to college for that career (at least community college). What year are you in high school? What financial issues are holding you back? Have you investigated the costs of college and more importantly the merit/financial aid that may be available to you?</p>
<p>There are lots of places to get these experiences. Whether your experience would be what you want in a college, itself, is anyone’s guess.</p>
<p>Whatever you will do, there will be an association. If you want to explore job related interests, look there. </p>
<p>Do you want to travel? Are you interested in local history/archaeology? Do you want to learn about specific topics? There is not only community college, but tons of adult education courses, you can explore anything you’re interested in, really, without much effort.</p>
<p>Goggle what you want and your location, and see what comes up. It won’t be as centralized as on a college campus, but there is a big wide world full of fascinating things and people to share them with. You have a lifetime of exploration ahead.</p>
<p>agree with kayf… dont know all your stats but if you spread your net wide, you could end up with some nice merit scholarships with that sat score… may be too late for this year, but maybe not, what major were you looking at ? what costs can you handle… if you got full tuition could you do loans for room?</p>
<p>And a few more ideas: military, peace corps, NGO’s (non-governmental organizations) - these places will give you some of the ‘community’ feel you might like. So would a lot of religious organizations.</p>
<p>With reference to the Peace Corps suggestion, 90% of Peace Corps assignments require a bachelor’s degree. OP, sometimes situations look bleak and individuals have a difficult time thinking outside the box with regards to their situations. Do you have an adult you can confide in- GC, minister/priest/rabbi, neighbor, relative, teacher- who may be able to help you develop a plan to follow your dreams? Another perspective may help you see ways to get around whatever obstacles life is throwing at you. Good luck!</p>
<p>With regards to Peace Corps…they do not accept students right out of high school. The 10% who do not have college degrees have significant life experience to bring to the table.</p>
<p>To the OP, many students don’t have that “like TV” college experience right out of high school. Some go to CC and commute from home, others work part time and go to school part time, others work full time and take evening classes.</p>
<p>If you are sure you don’t NEED a college degree, this will give you the chance to immediately enter your chosen field of work.</p>
<p>Don’t believe everything that you see on TV, movies, magazines.
Actually the best years of my life were the ones immediately after college. Don’t get me wrong, college was fun, but after college was even more fun. Between roommates and work friends, there was a ton of social activities and camaraderie. And by working, I had the money to be able to go out a lot, eat out a lot, travel, etc. and the friends to do it with.
So if you became friends with your coworkers and maybe move into an apartment, you may even get a better than collegiate experience.</p>
<p>I guess what I mainly feel I’m missing out on is the women’s college experience. I was planning on applying to coeds too, but I was pretty set on going to a WC for the special experience afforded there. </p>
<p>My grandmother went to Smith and my aunt went to Sweet Briar. They both always go on and on about how great the community spirits there were, the sisterhood, the traditions, all that. My aunt tells me about the zany fun she and the other students had in tap clubs and how emotional “ring night” was, and my grandmother has similar stories about Smith. They’re in alumnae clubs for their colleges and stuff. </p>
<p>I don’t know if there’s anything like it in the non-collegiate world? I know there are women’s social clubs, but they usually don’t have a sense of identity or traditions (or even young members, for that matter)…</p>
<p>Mt. Holyoke has the Frances Perkins program, and Smith has the Ada Comstock program, both geared toward the older, non-typical age student (24 and up). You could work for a few years to save, and then apply. Not only do those programs have outstanding financial aid available from the schools, but at 24 you would be considered “independent” for Fafsa, which could help you get more aid. “FP” students at Mt Holyoke fit right in, can live in special dorms or right along with traditional age students, and just are a regular part of everything, not treated any differently. Your chances to have such an experience at a Women’s college are far from over. Many of those schools also give excellent aid to traditional students. Why not apply and see what happens? Would your grandmother and aunt maybe be able to help a bit if you needed them to? Keep focusing on your academics, work and save as much as you can, and “keep your eye on the prize” and things may work out for you. Good luck!</p>
<p>OP. you’re being very mysterious on why you “can’t” attend college. Posters are assuming it is mainly due to financial reasons. I understand if you don’t want to let us know why you feel it’s impossible. Know that we feel there are ways to oversome adversity and attend. If you can share a little more there might be more useful recommendations.</p>
<p>If you don’t go to college this year, then don’t take any CC classes or anything. Don’t hurt your “incoming frosh” status in case you decide to go the following year.</p>
<p>What are your career plans?</p>
<p>Are you currently a senior?</p>
<p>From your posts, it appears that your family expects you to go to college, yet you say that family issues is one of the reasons that you won’t be going.</p>
<p>Times have changed so your relatives’ experiences would not be the same today. You are looking at the rose colored glasses memories of a time long ago. From your SAT test result it sounds like you have the intelligence to do fine in college. Finances may mean earning some money if college academics are your goal. Poor HS grades may mean you won’t get into college now, you will then need to build a resume to prove you can succeed in college.</p>
<p>It sounds like you would not do well and enjoy the experience at ANY college if you don’t want to go for the academics. We can’t have all experiences in life- your relatives gave up the fantastic coed UNIVERSITY I got to experience. You need to figure out your priorities in life. Long term as well as short term. For now it may be best for you to work and decide if it is worth getting training or college to meet goals 10 and 20 years from now. Decades ago some women went to college as a sort of finishing school- they met their future husband, married and never had careers. If your relatives have careers focus on that aspect, not the “bonding” or social life (which can happen at any school).</p>
<p>1.) I have a 3.9 UW GPA so it’s not that I won’t be able to get into college.
2.) Financial issues are one thing. I predict that I could get decent merit scholarships at SOME of the colleges I’m interested in, and I might be able to get the rest in financial aid, but my family really doesn’t want to pay much of anything for me to go to college, so I don’t know if it would work. Getting a full-ride, while possible, is obviously not a certainty.
3.) My family just doesn’t really want me to go to college. They see it as a waste of time and hassle (not my grandma and aunt, obviously) but my immediate family sees it that way, and without their support, it’s tough to imagine myself going.
4.) Another big thing is that my dad is sick and I don’t think I could justify leaving for college instead of staying home (or at least close by) and helping, and none of the colleges I’d actually want to attend are anywhere near us. </p>
<p>So, technically, I might be able to go to college, but like I said in the OP, I don’t realistically think it’s in the cards for me. </p>
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<p>From what I’ve heard from current students and recent alumni, a lot of the stuff my relatives loved still exists and is cherished at many of these colleges though.</p>
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<p>I get your point and that’s another reason I don’t think college is in the cards for me, but at the same time, think of the MANY people who go to college (even prestigious institutions) and do so mainly to party, make friends, network, or even just earn a piece of paper that’ll supposedly get them a job, etc. It’s not so far-fetched these days to not go to college mainly for academics.</p>
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<p>I’m confident that I’ll be able to get my desired job without a degree. I’m good at what I do and I already have some solid connections in the industry. But I keep thinking, I have all my life to WORK. This is the only chance I’ll get to go to college (at least, to have the normal experience and not be going when I’m an adult). That’s what bugging me a lot. </p>
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<p>What’s wrong with focusing on the bonding and social life? Maybe that can happen at any school, but so can career prep and networking, so I don’t see your point there.</p>
<p>Oh, and I just saw teachmom’s post on page 1. Thank you, teachmom! I feel like, if I forgo college and start my career now, I probably won’t want to interrupt it later in life to attend college, and I also would want to have the normal experience instead of being older than most people there…but I will definitely consider those programs and keep them in the back of my mind to reassure myself that my chance’s are not necessarily over if I decide not to go right away. :)</p>