<p>A few questions. Where do you live? And this one will sound callous, but it is important. What is the nature of your father’s illness? Is it terminal? A chronic condition that will require help for a number of years? Something from which he will recover in a year or so? Last, could you please tell us more about your career plans?</p>
<p>Hi
Is it OK to ask more of details?
What is the nature of help you can give at home if you stayed?
Do you need to take care of younger siblings, or have to bring in money to your household?
Is your father disabled, in the hospital, or at home and you have to nurse him?
Long time ago I was in the similar situation and the best thing I ever did was to leave home. I could have volunteered to stay and might have been expected to stay even though nobody forced me at that time.
Every family is different. Why do you feel that you must forgo this opportunity you worked hard for and seems important to you up to this point?
Where are you located? Is it possible to get out and meet new people, be exposed to and learn things that interest you if you are to stay at home?</p>
<p>Frankly, it sounds to me like you are copping out. Get off your butt and start working on the details of where you will visit, apply, tests to take, and all the other stuff that juniors are supposed to be doing these days. If things are a little tougher than they are for some others, you have to grow a spine and forge ahead. </p>
<p>Enough with the whimpering.</p>
<p>I must have submitted at the same time. We’ve asked almost same things.</p>
<p>What happened? who is whimpering? Do you know this student?</p>
<p>You should go to college. Apply and see what kind of FA comes your way.</p>
<p>There are definitely places that you could go to for cheap/free. But sometimes college isn’t for everyone. If it is your parents that are holding you back, well then you have to to break away if going to college is what you desire. Good luck and don’t forget:
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<p>Honestly, guys, I didn’t start this thread to brainstorm ways I could go to college and make it work. That’s not what this is about. I know most of you guys have good intentions with your advice, but I’m trying to figure out how to get at least part of the experience without necessarily going away to college. </p>
<p>There’s this quote by Muhammad Ali Jinnah: “I do not believe in taking the right decision, I take a decision and make it right.” So, assuming that the decision is that I won’t go to college, I’m trying to figure out how to make that decision right.</p>
<p>Take a look at these two threads. There are links for colleges that will give AUTOMATIC full ride+ scholarships for a certain GPA and SAT. Your scores and grades are great, and many schools might even give you a living stipend so your parents wouldn’t even have to pay for your groceries, plane tickets, etc. </p>
<p><a href=“http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/financial-aid-scholarships/1348012-automatic-full-tuition-full-ride-scholarships.html?highlight=automatic+merit+scholarship[/url]”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/financial-aid-scholarships/1348012-automatic-full-tuition-full-ride-scholarships.html?highlight=automatic+merit+scholarship</a></p>
<p><a href=“http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/financial-aid-scholarships/848226-important-links-automatic-guaranteed-merit-scholarships.html?highlight=automatic[/url]”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/financial-aid-scholarships/848226-important-links-automatic-guaranteed-merit-scholarships.html?highlight=automatic</a></p>
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<p>What part of the experience is most important to you?
You don’t need to attend college to find people with shared interests. You can find them in a church youth group, or a fitness club, or doing community service, or at your job.<br>
If you want to learn together, find a book club or take a community college class.
If it’s living with other young people that you want, then look on Craig’s list to find a shared apartment.</p>
<p>Hello. Education is definitely worth it, from personal experience. Please don’t skip out on college. That being said, it can be a wonderful online school cheaper than a traditional one. There’s plenty of financial aid out there and literally millions of dollars in scholarships. Please don’t give up!</p>
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<p>If your high school transcript is commensurate with these scores, you are certainly a strong candidate for college. I don’t know specifically what is stopping you, but if it is finances or the desire to pursue a career where a BA is not needed, think about ways you can shorten college. If you have several AP credits, or if you can get CLEP credits, and if you take a heavy courseload at college (which your high scores suggest you could handle), maybe you could graduate in three years from some schools, instead of the usual four.</p>
<p>Also, by WHEN in your life do you want to have had the “live-away-at-college-with-my-peers” experience? Right now? Within the next four or five years?</p>
<p>As has been pointed out up-thread, many of the women’s colleges do have programs designed specifically for non-traditional-age students. Many of them can also be extremely generous for top students transferring from a community college. Some also admit visiting students for a semester or a year which means that you could attend a local college/university but do a “junior year abroad at home” at a place you like better.</p>
<p>You have not been very specific about your career goals. Are they best met by starting now? Will attending college in some way, shape, or form, ultimately be necessary for your career, or is it only marginally useful? Yes, some careers don’t need college at all, and others (ballet dancers for example) really are best entered when one is young and healthy, but leave open the possibility of higher education upon retirement from that career. If you can bring yourself to indicate the specific career, we may be able to come up with advice more specific to your situation.</p>
<p>Lastly, as mentioned above, your father’s specific medical conditions also plays into your decision-making. If he is terminal, then you may want to stay close for the time remaining, and for a bit afterward to help your mother out. However, you would be able to pursue your education later - or transfer to a college/university that you believe is more congenial later. If your father’s condition is chronic, you need to think long and hard about whether you want to sacrifice so much of your life and happiness to his care. Some people can do that with no bitterness. Others can’t. And granted, at this point in time it is difficult to judge whether any guilt you might feel from going would be greater than any bitterness you might feel from staying. I have friends and family who carved out happy lives after choosing to stay close by and care for their parents. I also know people whose bitterness at taking on that responsibility knows no bounds. Only you know your own temperament. Oddly, leaving home may make you into a better daughter.</p>
<p>Wishing you all the best as you face your choices.</p>
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<p>Yes, and whether the father even wants the child to delay her education for several years. I doubt I would in the same situation.</p>
<p>Just a few days ago you were quesrying about colleges in the south or west. Now you say college isnt in the cards. Are your really sure, or is there just something that was said in passing this week? If your dad is ill, how serious is it? Terminal? If so, you might want to stay close to home for school and transfer later.</p>
<p>** crossposted with happymom.</p>
<p>I am very sorry that you are going through all of this. I would try to get involved in some volunteer organizations that involve young women. It sounds like you are looking for the companionship of a group of like minded young women. You may want to see if there is a Junior league in your community or another such organization. Think about the types of things you enjoy and see if there is a volunteer group associated with this and get involved. You could meet a lifelong group of friends. </p>
<p>I echo the sentiments of those who have said to keep your options open. A year may bring a lot of changes and if you consider this a gap year, you could regroup next year and see if things have changed. happymomof1 gave some very good points. There are many people who postpone college for many reasons. There is no reason at this point in your life to write off the chance of going to college for the rest of your life.</p>
<p>What you can do is not say you are not going to college but you are delaying going to college and still keep it in your future. Since you cannot predict the future you do not know 1 year from now or 5 years from now what exactly you will be doing.</p>
<p>If you decide now you will never go to college, you will be setting your course. Don’t.</p>
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<p>Keep in mind that the above is often a romanticized image of college which doesn’t pan out…causing lots of angst among those whose fantasies of the perfect college experience fell far short in reality.</p>
<p>I started as a women’s college (which shall be forever unnamed), and found many of my fellow students much more interested in weekend activities at the nearby campus with men on it (especially frat parties) than in talking about Great Ideas. Not quite the college experience I was hoping for; I didn’t stay there.</p>
<p>You are not your aunt nor grandmother, and what they might have found just peachy about their experiences doesn’t mean that you would have the same experiences even if you attended one of their schools, nor even like those experiences if you did. Figure out what you want rather than pinning your hopes and dreams on what they experienced. It’s probably good that you are not going to college (at least right now); it sounds to me as though you have more growing to do before you are ready to make big decisions for yourself.</p>
<p>RaspberrySorbet, if you truly are committed to making the best of the situation you feel you must accept, then simply accept it. If you really don’t think you can and/or need to go to school, then accept that you will not be going to school. You have no idea what you are or are not missing out on … your aunts’ experience is not yours. Who knows? You might have had an awful time if you had gone to their alma maters. </p>
<p>If you are convinced that you cannot go to school, then don’t pine about it. Figure out how to make the best of it. Get a job. Volunteer in the community. Make the most of your family life. </p>
<p>And, by the way … it is never too late to go to college. You may one day decide to go, so don’t assume it is “never to be.”</p>