<p>So this is like my 4th or 5th attempt at an essay...
It's about my favourite academic subject.</p>
<p>I have never been a fan of Mathematics. Whilst doing problems Id often find myself asking, whats the point of all this? Is any of this practical?, but I kept taking Mathematics as it was unthinkable my parents certainly thought so for an Asian boy not to study it. Therefore when I was invited to take part in University Maths I was naturally hesitant, but on the advice of my teacher I decided to give it a go, as I could drop it if I found it uninteresting. </p>
<p>For the first half of the year I found the course unstimulating; sure it was challenging, but I still found no reason for studying matrices, complex numbers and other things that had no meaning in the real world. I was on the verge of dropping the course when our teacher handed out a particularly different assignment. The assignment contained a bonus problem which was supposed to be done for fun. I scoffed at the idea of having fun doing maths, but one day I stumbled upon that assignment while cleaning the desk. At first it looked impossible; lots of xs and ys with exponentials that were too scary to think about. However as I was about to put it away, I saw something within the problem. I worked at it but it came to a dead end. Not wanting to admit defeat I tried another angle, but again to no avail. I gave it several more tries until I looked up and realised that Id been on this problem for almost four hours. What the hell am I doing, wasting this much time on a maths problem? Then I realised something; I was having fun. It didnt matter that this problem had no practical application in the real world. When I finally got the correct angle and was on the verge of solving the problem, the numbers naturally clicked in. It was almost romantic and when I told this to the teacher and he replied with a smile, thats the beauty of mathematics.</p>
<p>You wrote: Therefore when I was invited to take part in University Maths I was naturally hesitant, but on the advice of my teacher I decided to give it a go, as I could drop it if I found it uninteresting. </p>
<p>Reword it if you can, I tried here: Naturally, when I recieved an invitation to take a University Math course I was hesitant. My teacher still managed to encourage me to try it out - and anyways, I could just drop it if I didn't like it.</p>
<p>Basically, just try and make it flow a little better. But then, there is no real problem with it, and thats just my preference. Its fine the way it is, you might want to look at word Choice. Add some dates too, how long ago was this?</p>
<p>I have never been a fan of Mathematics. Whilst doing problems Id often find myself asking, whats the point of all this? Is any of this practical?, but I kept taking Mathematics as it was unthinkable my parents certainly thought so for an Asian boy not to study it. </p>
<p>You switch tenses there, and it's awkward. I'd say "I'd never been a fan", then you're keeping your past tense and it doesn't make the reader go Huh?</p>
<p>but one day I stumbled upon that assignment while cleaning the desk. </p>
<p>Which desk? Try "my desk"</p>
<p>Also, I found the large amount of quotation marks annoying, but that's just me, and it's late so I'm maybe picky (or maybe I just really love math, it's true...) I'd also add another sentence to the end, a better "clencher" sentence, because I feel like the essay never really explains your feelings if you end with something said by another person.</p>
<p>i think a lot of the quotation marks are unnecessary. some of them work, but some of them don't. prettyfish, i guess you're not the only picky one then.</p>
<p>"having fun doing maths" <== is it math or maths? it thought it was just math, without the "s".</p>
<p>try to make it flow better. it sounds kind of staccatoed (i can't spell, obviously). you don't have to try to sound sophisticated or anything because then it'll usually end up sounding awkward. try to sound more like yourself i guess is what i'm saying.</p>
<p>"Not wanting to admit defeat..." <== it would sound better (at least to me) if you used "Unwilling to admit defeat..." instead. i think "unwilling" (or something else like it) sounds better and is more concise.</p>
<p>anyhow, all of this is my opinion and you don't have to listen to any of it if you don't want to. i'm kind of annoying and opinionated and bossy, so you can ignore me if you want. oh yeah, and i'm sorry your parents made you study math (even though you like it now). asian parents...<em>sigh</em></p>
<p>I think that it works really well! I love the last quote and I don't think it's paticularly overused. You should make the essay sound more formal... rephrase: sure it was challenging; What the hell am I doing. That's just my opinion though because you might be trying to sound informal.</p>