So, i just graduated from college and this is my first internship abroad. This is going to be my second month already and i am supposed to finish 12 months. The company i am working in right now is pretty good they have good benefits and everything, but it’s just that i feel like the work is not suited for me. I am not happy with what i am doing and with my lifestyle here. I feel like i am starting to get depressed, i am having negative thoughts that i never had back home. I dread waking up to work, i count the days in the calendar every night before i go to bed, and i just feel like time is crawling very very slowly. I miss my family and my life back home so bad. I try to talk to my parents via facetime but they don’t understand how i feel, they don’t think believe i have anything to be depressed about. I do try my best to stay positive though and i always keep in mind that if i finish this i would make my parents proud and would learn a lot from this experience. However, i just keep having second thoughts at the back of my mind. I want to go back home so bad, i even talked to the hr manager about this. She told me i am free to go home in 3 months. I was so happy to hear this and was already considering it but i do not want to disappoint my parents, they have been very supportive about my decision to intern in the US and shouldered the finances for this program. I am also afraid of what the other people might say about me, i do not want my parents to be ashamed of me or hear others say that their child is a quitter. I feel so selfish thinking about quitting and not even doing at least half the number of months required but i feel like i would be happy if i do go home early. What do you think i should do?
Do you have someone in your life whom you can discuss your feelings and situation with?
I wonder if your feelings are due to “culture shock”, which might improve on its own with time. Or if your surroundings are incompatible with your needs, in a way that makes going home early your best course of action. Someone who knows you, whom you trust to discuss your thoughts and feelings and circumstances with, will be in a much better position to help you sort this out than a stranger on the internet.
From a distance, it sounds like your parents might be your best resource. You described them as being very supportive. You said that shame is holding you back from telling them. I don’t know where you are from and how important appearances are in your culture. Where I am from, parents’ first and foremost concern is the well-being of their child. My parents would want to know if I was suffering. Yes, they might be a little bit disappointed that my internship didn’t work out, but they’d proud that I trusted them enough to tell them.
I am confused that your manager said that you cannot go home until 3 months from now. Why is that? What would happen if you got on a plane next week and flew home, without your employer’s permission?
If you need assistance to get back to your home country, e.g. because your employer has your passport or because you cannot afford the flight back, reach out to your country’s consulate in the US. Helping their citizens get back home is a big part of what consulates do.
In case your workplace is being abusive, here’s a pamphlet about your legal rights in the US and a list of American authorities you can turn to for help. For example, it would be illegal for your employer to keep your passport away from you, or to restrict your movement outside of work.
We see similar posts every semester from US students who have gone to study abroad, and I hear this regularly from ex-patriates who are on their first posting abroad.
It is common enough that many companies who are moving people to another country for the first time have prep sessions on how to handle it before they go.
Homesickness is real, but it is not forever (home is always home, of course! but the pain of homesickness diminishes).
However, to get past it you have to work at it. There is a lot of advice in the Study Abroad forum- start with this recent thread, which has some very good suggestions: http://talk.qa.collegeconfidential.com/discussion/comment/21769628#Comment_21769628).
Moving to any new place is just hard; to a new country it’s even harder. But (as somebody with a lot of experience in this area!) you can do it. And the process of doing it- all the learning and growing you do- will stand to you your whole life.
One thing to know: there is a pretty predictable rhythm to adjusting to a new place, especially when moving to a country with a new / different language. I’m sure that the 3 month mark the HR person mentioned has to do with the hiring arrangement, but in fact 3 months is about when people who have moved to a new country suddenly realize that everyday life has gotten easier.
Thank you for the advice! I never told anyone how i really felt and it feels good to have people give their advice and insights.
I actually asked the hr if i could do half of the 12 months, which is 6 months instead, but she said the place i’m working at wont have that much work on the 4th and 5th month, so she suggested that i go home earlier.
I’ve talked to my parents and told me 3 months is too short for an internship but if the company will allow me to do 6-8 months they support me ending the program a little bit earlier.
It’s always nice to realize that you aren’t alone 
Try some of the suggestions in the other thread- different ones work better for different people, but they are all tried and tested. Come back & let us know how you are doing.