<p>Love reading all the answers. I wonder what the kids on the board would say?</p>
<p>So here’s my next question: having gone through the search once or twice, what would your search criteria be if you did it again?</p>
<p>For my family, the crucial criteria would now be:
Is there any chance for generous, grant-based FA?
Does the school have activities that our kids might be interested in? Not–this time–a current sport/activity, but is there no sport (for example) offered in the winter that would even remotely interest my kid?
Are the academics significantly better than what he or she would get at home?
Is the school population–students and teachers–geographically, socio-economically, and ethnically diverse?</p>
<p>It does seem to get harder to meet those criteria as we move away from the top tier and into hidden gems–not impossible, but harder. Most of the criteria above are made possible by the funding that often comes with prestige.</p>
<p>For parents who are looking at BS’s for the very 1st time in their lives, it is a helpful exercise to do an initial sort by the numbers. Yes, this is a cold, brutal methodology (and I agree w classicalmama tha numbers can be manipulated), and I absolutely agree with you that a BS is much, much more than its numbers— the numbers alone do not reflect the important soft characteristics: the friendliness of the student body, the great traditions, the food, the %boarding, the warmth of the advisors, the coziness of the dorms, etc… Your kid is not a vulcan/robot. BS will be home & erstwhile surrogate parent for your kid for the next 3-4 years. </p>
<p>Being a natural nerd, I plotted admit rate vs. avg SSAT percentiles for a long list of schools (source of data was Boardingschoolreview.com) to see which schools are outliers (i.e. they do NOT fall on the overall trend). What emerges is that some school have disproportionately low admit rates vs SSAT scores. This is an indication to me that these schools possess some special, desirable quality besides just the academics. </p>
<p>Then there are some schools that have surprisingly high SSAT percentiles for their higher admit rates. This may be the consequence of the school being relatively unknown (a.k.a. “Hidden Gem”). Episcopal falls into this latter category; its admit rate is significantly higher than those of the top BS in the NE. And as you point out, Episcopal is in the South and, therefore, is probably not on the radar of the bulk pool of applicants from the NE area. So while the school is not a hidden gem to Southerners, it is a Hidden Gem to unaware Yankees… :-)</p>
<p>Sorry, I am unable to display my geeky graph on this website, but it’s easy enough for anybody to plot for themselves. Another useful plot is Endowment size vs. Admit rate, to see where you might have a better chance of getting FA. You can plot and compare any stats (the engineer in me coming out…) CAUTION: you have to plot a large number of schools to see a meaningful statistical trend. When you plot enough data, the exceptional schools emerge.</p>
<p>My message here is to NOT accept the numbers literally, but to simply use the numbers as a guide.</p>
<p>Our method was…urgency. I am not proud of it (though it worked out) but post it here because there may be others who are in the same boat. We are in a remote area with only public high school options. The schools used to be reputable but the class sizes have exploded while class offerings have diminished. The kids were in a small private K-8 and when older child started public high school she soon began to feel trapped. So with less than a month to application deadlines we could only do a web search and chose five schools to apply to. Later, when we did visit, we realized that three of the five were never going to be a fit. Luckily, it only takes one and it worked out just fine. So much for web searching. ALL the web sites and brochures were appealing so we learned that VISITS are paramount.</p>
<p>Younger child reaped the benefits of older child’s experience, of course, but we still ended up with an unconventional process. Though we had visited, by now, six pretty different schools, we still wanted to see more. The original plan was to wait a year (and red-shirt) but the universe had something else planned. While we wanted to apply to a range of schools, we knew that with older child already at BS, we needed more FA. We applied to one school for 2011-12 initially because it gave us a red-shirt option and our backup plan was to homeschool. Child was waitlisted and the homeschool partnership we set up faced steep scheduling issues. This forced our hand about red-shirting. So while the original plan was to visit and apply to 10-12 schools for 2012-13, we ended up being encouraged to do a late application to a school that fit our criteria (location, languages, sports, FA) for 2011-12 and, I still can’t believe it, it has been a terrific fit. </p>
<p>Looking back at the chaos that this process created for us, here’s my advice for those who are from remote areas:</p>
<p>1) Though expensive and cumbersome, visiting is paramount – and preferably before applying.<br>
2) If you need FA, applying to a broad range of schools is still crucial.
3) If you come from a remote area in a region outside the NE, be mindful of the differences in culture. My kids were big fish in a small pond at home. In the NE, they have met kids who have been groomed for this all of their lives and have more money than my kids had EVER seen. I believe that if they had ended up at some of the top tier schools they aspired to they would have been overwhelmed by the cultural differences.
4) Even if you are not sure you want to go, start the process early so that you have options. You can always say no, but rushing is not a good idea (duh). We had the advantage of having an educational background, being from the NE and having family members who knew this world.<br>
4) As others have said, LOVE THE SCHOOL THAT LOVES YOU. We visited schools that clearly thought they were doing us a favor but ended up at schools where we are valued. I shudder to think what it would be like to manage long-distance parenting with a school that isn’t very warm and welcoming.</p>
<p>There might be some value in adjusting the “Hidden Gems” list over time, but probably not yet. I’m told, for instance, that the “40 Colleges That Change Lives” list changes periodically. As a college becomes more popular, it is replaced with another strong college that is less known.</p>
<p>What is important - prestige or not - is what wcmom articulated so well:</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>Even in the event that a school (like Exeter) is a good fit, the fact that there are several thousand applications for only a few hundred spots suggests that many of the strong students who are denied are going on to thrive at other boarding schools. And if we took the extreme position that those same three thousand applicants also applied to SPS and Andover, it still leaves several thousand students who won’t find a BS home. Hence - broad reach, and choose fit versus status (although both can coexist for some students) because the daylight between many boarding schools - academically - is becoming less and less. Strong stats may have as much to do with choosing children already at the top of their game at application time and what goes into them once they arrive.</p>
<p>My suggestion is to pick a school that fits now, but will also fit in 3-4 years. </p>
<p>Our search for boarding schools was not as straightforward as those posted above, and I include it here because many people in similar circumstances have contacted me about our choice - my daughter is subject accelerated by 2+ years, with AP science credits in 8th grade, and we were weighing 9th grade at a Boarding School against:</p>
<p>1) early college/dual enrollment in our local college and high school</p>
<p>2) Davidson Academy (high school/early college in Reno)</p>
<p>3) other boarding early colleges (at age 14)</p>
<p>Since home schooling/dual college/high school would have involved a lot of running around, which we have been doing for a few years already in the home/middle/high school combinations, we were well aware of the hassle factor with her not driving yet. She also liked sports and kids her own age.</p>
<p>So we looked for boarding schools that offered 3-4 strong years of college/post AP level math and science, with well-attended classes (not “individual study oportunities”) and a culture that respected/supported that kind of academic interest. We openly discussed in the admission interviews that early college was our other choice.</p>
<p>We started out looking at about 12 boarding schools (chosen by academics), and she narrowed it down pretty quickly. Not that many schools offered what she was looking for.</p>
<p>Thankfully, she was accepted to her eventual boarding school first choice, made the decision to try it instead of college, and loves it. She is certainly academically challenged, and having a great time, too.</p>
<p>Here is a topic I have thought long and hard about.</p>
<p>I have one child graduating a HADES school in a few weeks. I have another at another boarding school (hidden gem?).</p>
<p>If the goal is HYPMS admission, the HADES school is definitely not the best choice. I have looked over the Naviance data and the school’s college matriculation data of the HADES school, and find that if one is not in the top 13%, one had better be an athlete, URM, heavy donor, or legacy. The 13% is the percentage which begins to crack the Ivies. For HYP, you are looking at the top 7%. The top 7% at a HADES probably places you in the top 0.1% of the general high school population, which means that at another less competitive school your chances would undoubtedly be better (for HYPMS).</p>
<p>There is the issue of the power of the HADES college admissions office, and their ability to directly contact Ivy admissions offices. I have found, however, that this is generally not used unless the student is “important” (i.e., the scion of a prominent donor family), or the school has an internal need (the president of the class did not get into ANY school, and the head of school makes the call to get them into a waitlisted Ivy, to avoid some embarassment to the school).</p>
<p>I believe (some of you may take issue with this) that the HADES schools teach children the behaviors of elites (see Khan’s book Privilege). I have seen the transformation in children at my daughter’s school. There is a sea change in behavior within a year or less. The level of comfort in social situations, the poise, and the confidence, is dramatic. One child I knew, would have been considered socially very juvenile at the beginning of 9th grade. When I met her recently, she was poised, and had the “look” and attitude I have come to associate with students from these schools. You could well call this elitist, but depending upon the career path you are looking for, it can be a significant advantage. It is this sense of ease in the world of elites which I feel these schools teach, above and beyond the academics. Whether you value it or not is another matter, and one which oculd certainly be discussed.</p>
<p>@tigerdad: Thanks for sharing your observations. Note that my original intent in starting this thread was not about HADES being a springboard to HYP+MS…but rather another installment in my ongoing campaign to get kids and parents to consider a wider range of schools when applying to BS.</p>
<p>That said, I think your observations about being near the top of an already high-achieving group can trickle down to the BS application process. If my kid were applying exclusively to the most selective schools, I’d feel better about his/her chances if I knew that he/she was in the top 10% of the pool (and not based solely on SSAT scores).</p>
<p>Then yes, I agree wholeheartedly, that there are many other good options other than the HADES schools. They clearly have brand-name recognition and for some this is quite important. There are, however, many other excellent options in the BS world, and I agree that focusing on HADES exclusively, is a recipe for much pain.</p>
<p>@Tigerdad, I would think that, in the case of my D’s school, if you put twelve children around a table and expect them to strongly participate to the extent that they are teaching their peers, they will emerge with an increased level of social confidence and poise. I think those qualities would be an advantage with any career path chosen. I am not sure how this gets put in the category of being elitist.</p>
<p>I am curious to know what you mean by the “look” and “attitude” that these kids display that you associate with the HADES schools (and not the other boarding schools). Btw, my D is only in her first year, and I know you have been around longer. </p>
<p>I am not taking offense to your opinions, I am just curious.</p>
<p>When spouse & I visited S’s school for Spring Parent’s Weekend, we actually had conversation about how striking it was that the kids were dressed like their preppy parents-- it was actually kinda scary… </p>
<p>And we debated whether the preppy-dressed kids were minor copies of their parents, or whether the preppy-dressed parents never learned any fashion sense since leaving their BS.</p>
<p>Tiger and GMT, yes, agree with you. Particularly with the old NE institutions, there is very much a “finishing school” component layered on top of all the usual academic and EC benefits. These kids learn the gestures, the phrases, the humor etc that represent the “language” of “I belong.”</p>
<p>GMTplus7 - I wonder if you would ever imagine yourself saying “when spouse & I visited S’s school for Spring Parents Weekend, we actually had a conversation about how striking it was that the kids were dressed like their hip hop parents – it was actually kinda scary…” and continue to “whether the hip hop parents never learned any fashion sense…”</p>
<p>However you indicated that it was the kids who were dressed as their parents, not vice versa. And the statement you made was not at all about you, so why turn it into it now?</p>
<p>and no, I don’t dress like a teenage boy either.</p>
<p>I felt this would raise an eyebrow or two. I feel I have some perspective on this particular issue, as I was raised in an inner city lower middle class white neighborhood where these issues were not even on the radar. Over the years, I received a professional degree and then a doctorate, and was exposed more to the academic world. My children attended a private day school in a rural area and we were friendly with a number of families with connections to the boarding/HADES world. Two were on the board of trustees of two separate HADES schools. During my nine years of association with that school and the parents, as well as during my professional like, and now for four years of HADES immersion, I can say that there is a clearly distinguishable set of social interactions which the Northeast elite have. This is not bad; it is not necessarily good. I believe, however, that the schools under discussion are so infused with individuals who display this set of social interactions that it permeates the school. The mores, and what is acceptable to discuss are internalized, as are subtleties of body language and vocal inflection. The behaviors are present not only in the administrators, but also in most of the teachers. </p>
<p>Again, this neither necessarily “good” or “bad”. I personally believe that it is helpful to be able to display these behaviors, if one wishes to fit in with others who are (for example) in investment banking, hedge funds, corporate law, etc., or in institutions which service these individuals (such as HADES schools).</p>