If I get into Stanford, my parents won't allow me to go! Please help!

College Search & Selection
41

<p>This whole situation sounds a bit overdramatic, if you get what I mean.</p>

42

<p>While I can’t imagine why any parent would oppose their child going to Stanford, it is not abuse to refuse to pay college tuition. No one has a right to demand that someone give them $250,000, whether it be a college that you want to attend or your parents. </p>

<p>Financial aid programs presume that parents will pay. And, frankly, they have to do that. Otherwise, anyone could get their child a free ride by just “refusing to pay.” In a situation like this, where a parent truly refuses to pay it puts the student in a bad spot, but that’s how it works. </p>

<p>I would strongly recommend against doing anything behind your parents’ back. Investigate all your options thoroughly. If your first choice remains a college they refuse to pay for, explain to them why you are so passionate about it (and, no, national ranking is not relevant). They may come around, they may not. If they don’t, then pick a school they will either pay for or you can pay for yourself (as others have suggested). But don’t make a bad situation worse by trying to secretly apply to schools without them knowing.</p>

43

<p>It worries me every time some student on the board claims his scores are XXXX because that’s what they got on practice tests. Those are not real. Even if there is a strong correlation and you are practicing under “test conditions” there is no way to be SURE about a score until you take it. If you are counting on merit aid as a substantial part of your plan (not to mention you need high scores for Ivies), then waiting until March to find out what your options will be sounds late to me. I would try and take it in Jan and then you have time to retake and improve and you can then come up with a list of schools to consider. </p>

<p>No point in fighting with parents over schools that may all be reaches.</p>

44

<p>Based on what the OP has written, it appears that the following are the options:</p>

<ol>
<li>Rutgers</li>
</ol>

<p>or</p>

<ol>
<li>A school that gives Merit Scholarships of $40,000 or greater</li>
</ol>

45

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<p>This treatment sounds emotionally abusive. Not the unwillingness to pay, the constant put downs and poor treatment. Treating your kids like dirt when they have nowhere else to go is abusive. </p>

<p>I’m not suggesting that he do anything illegal, I’m suggesting that he find a way to apply for full ride scholarships without his parents getting in his way to control him. If they take money from him, then he must have some to begin with. He will be 18 when he goes to college, but he needs the opportunity to go, and online payments require either a debit card. I think, if he can trust his GC, he should talk to his GC about the emotional abuse and let her know that he wants to quietly apply for full rides to get out from the yoke of parental control. </p>

<p>Once independent, he can choose to build a healthy relationship with them without the control. Or not.</p>

46

<p>The OP can look here for some options: <a href=“http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/financial-aid-scholarships/1348012-automatic-full-tuition-full-ride-scholarships.html[/url]”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/financial-aid-scholarships/1348012-automatic-full-tuition-full-ride-scholarships.html&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

47

<p>@ClassicRockerDad: Your follow-up post makes more sense. If there were truly emotional abuse involved, the better option would be to seek the advice and support of an adult (or peer counselor) the student trusts. There’s no need for a child to take on a problem like that by himself.</p>