<p>On the contrary, I am equally annoyed when I express my pleasure that my son was awarded a “scholarship” (which he did because it is awarded in memorial to an individual name… and my other son who is attending the same school only received need based aid and much less) and my friend tells me… oh my kids didn’t get any aid because we made too much money (went to state schools that only give aid to very needy). Some people just do not understand the process… Not worth getting annoyed about, I suppose.</p>
<p>I guess I just don’t see the problem. Even a student with a need-based financial aid package earned their way in, even though the admissions office knows that that student can’t pay and that they aren’t making any money off that student. Why wouldn’t it be merit aid? Non-need students who get “pure merit aid” are given the money because that college wants them. Students with need are given the same money because the college wants them, too. Is that not merit?</p>
<p>I guess I don’t understand the vice versa, either. Perhaps it’s just “over my head.” If you’re talking to someone who clearly knows nothing about the process, why does it matter what they think? I was at Stanford and one student I was speaking with insisted that she didn’t get a scholarship because she is “brown” (i.e., Indian) and insinuated that I did get a scholarship because I am black. She clearly had no idea what she was talking about, but that just made what she said that much less pertinent.</p>
<p>It’s as if students with need-based aid are being considered less “worthy” because they didn’t “earn” their scholarships on “academic merit.”</p>
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<p>That’s a case of poor research, not bad word use. Anyone who even bothers to open up the financial aid website of any need-based college will know, right off the bat, that that isn’t the case. I think we should expect more of our students and parents, that they not just instantly believe what they are told.</p>
<p>I’m a great lover of clarity and it bothers me when the word scholarship is used so loosely. Schools can be the worst perpetrators of this, often giving names to their various finaid grants. </p>
<p>My D was offered one that was called a combination of merit and financial aid. What the hell is that? How can I plan my financials for the next year when they could raise or lower this grant to whatever level they come up with through their silly, mysterious process? If it’s finaid, then I know it will be about the same if our financial situation is the same. If it’s merit aid, then I know it will repeat if D does a good job with her GPA. Keep it simple!</p>
<p>D applied to too many schools that give no merit aid, and these schools (surprise!) were also the least generous with finaid. I don’t think these schools are worth applying to and so I would like to keep it clear that THEY DON’T GIVE SCHOLARSHIPS! </p>
<p>Not that I begrudge anyone else’s happiness and glee about a great finaid award, those can be all over the map and if some school makes it possible for your kid to go there ----- GREAT!!!</p>
<p>One place my other D applied to offered her a “partial tuition waiver” based on her stats. Well, that’s a new phrase and I’m glad it’s completely clear. Maybe that’s what merit scholarships should be called.</p>
<p>My son received a very generous FA package from his school, only a tiny part of which was “merit”–some federal program that I can’t recall the details of–and a small but very welcome local scholarship. His school doesn’t do NMS scholarships.</p>
<p>I would never brag about his getting almost a “full ride” to his school: I am not an idiot. When the subject of cost of attending college comes up with other parents who are friends of mine with kids in college, I say that the school has been very generous and that we are very grateful. Recently a friend with two kids in college asked me if he received it because he was so smart–they were complimenting my S, and not being nosy, it was a reasonable question in the context of the conversation–I said no, it is all need-based, for which we qualify, unfortunately, and we feel very lucky that he was able to get in to a school with such generous FA. I said I don’t know what we would have done if he hadn’t, which is the truth.</p>
<p>I really think that putting on airs about such things is supremely foolish. Either tell the truth or don’t engage in conversation on the topic.</p>
<p>I am for one who has always said that I do not believe there is any school that is “need blind.” To me what it means is that a student is admitted without any consideration whether he/she’ll needs FA. Many parents and students who’ll need FA have argued fiercely that indeed some schools are need blind, and everyone should apply if stats are good enough. I don’t believe that. I think even “need blind” schools offer better FA to students who they want more, may it be stats, race, or special talent. If a students is just an average qualified student AND need FA, then that student is at a disadvantage relative to a full pay student. Therefore need based scholarship at those schools has some “merit” component in it.</p>
<p>When D1 was in grade school, she came home to tell me something that was shocking, “Mommy, did you know that Susie is on FA at our school? What does that mean?” I told her that Susie was such a special student that her school was willing to give her money to attend. I explained to her that her school had some money set aside to help some very talented students to attend her school. Is that merit or need based?</p>
<p>oldfort–It sounds like it may have been finaid…kudos to you for delicately putting the matter in the best light for your daughter.</p>
<p>What is annoying to some of us is the fact that some poor kids honestly believe that they are entitled to financial aid because they are poor and happened to get accepted at an expensive school. In our case, our S was very successful with the college application process six years ago. His stats were great and he was a great candidate. It amazed him that kids with lower stats (and no money for college) were getting merit aid and need based aid. These kids were thrilled that they were able to go to college without having to worry about where to get the money. These were kids who he knew personally, and kids he went to high school with. These were kids with decent qualifications, but no better than his. In fact, he was head and shoulders above these kids in many ways.
We didn’t meet the formula to get aid. Shame on us. We both worked our whole lives, and saved a little money. However, the cost for S to attend college was still a major concern. We were able to take out loans and stress out a lot about how to manage this and his sister’s pending education, even though FAFSA told us we were rich! 
So our S took it upon himself to get the only “merit” scholarship he could in order to attend his school of choice. After two years of college, he decided to help our family financially by committing to an ROTC scholarship. (he also felt compelled to give back to our country and serve.) Because he was not poor, and he was not an ethnic anomaly, this was actually the only way he could get a partial “scholarship” to help finance his education at the time.</p>
<p>He is currently serving for a year in a combat zone in Iraq, and has committed to serving our country for at least four years. He will have earned this money!
So yes, we do resent the fact that some kids feel that they are entitled to financial aid with no strings attached because they are poor and they think they have earned the right to get money for a college simply because they were accepted to that college. For my S, the acceptance was the easy part.</p>
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<p>When one of my kids was accepted to college, she got a scholarship (called a Trustee Scholarship) in the financial aid package (we applied for aid) that was quite substantial. I called and asked how that was awarded (basis of it). I was told it was a merit award and that the amount of it took need into account. This award was to be given to her all four years for the same amount and so in our case, we knew the scholarship ahead of time for the following years. A nice bonus was on the bill in senior year, there were three additional, but smaller scholarships, she won that we didn’t even know existed (we didn’t even know that the original one existed until she got it either). </p>
<p>I still don’t understand the “problem” on this thread. Why are people worried if others don’t understand the scholarships or aid at certain schools? If they are not well informed, so what? YOU know what the scholarship was for. I would be honest and explain if asked. I would not mislead anyone. If people have misconceptions, that’s their problem, not mine.</p>
<p>1sokkermom, I am not comprehending why anyone would resent those who get need based aid. Yes, as full pay parents, you had to borrow money to fund your child’s education and you did not get aid. But even those of us who did get need based aid, we also have to borrow money to fund out kids’ educations. In both scenarios, we’re all paying a percentage of our income toward education. Those who don’t qualify for aid have a larger income than we do. It is not easier for those of us who got aid, in other words. We make less. We still have huge college loans to pay (most aid packages include loans, not just grants/scholarships). The level of “hardship” to pay off these loans for our kids is every bit as much as your hardship to pay for college. It is relative to how much one earns. It is not like, gee, our kids got some grants, so now we are rolling in the dough. We had less to begin with to pay for college, and it is not due to working any less than full pay parents.</p>
<p>1sokkermom,</p>
<p>Kudos to you and your husband for raising such an upstanding, responsible and considerate son. And Kudos to your son as well. I could not agree with you more.</p>
<p>It is disheartening to find out that all your hard work has paid off so well in the eyes of Fafsa! I guess in the end, your children will do well for your having set such a good example.</p>
<p>Also, I don’t get the comment that those who get aid are not worrying about where to get money to pay for college!!! Most aid comes with loans. I don’t know who you know, but as parents with two kids who received FA for four year private colleges (and one who is going to grad school for several years), we are worrying about paying for college as grants don’t nearly cover the cost…we have huge loans that we’ll be paying off for at least ten years per each college they attended. The concern to pay for the college is the same as for you. The amount we have to pay off is commensurate with our income as the amount you have to pay off is with yours.</p>
<p>^ The resentment lies in part to the “entitlement” attitude. Just because some one is poor, they are not entitled to financial aid. Believe it or not, some of these “poor” kids really don’t work any harder or smarter than the kids who get no aid because they are not “poor”.</p>
<p>krusso, do you think parents who receive financial aid don’t also work hard? Or their kids?</p>
<p>1sokkermom, where is the entitlement? When we applied for financial aid, we had no idea if we would get any. When we did, we felt grateful. We did not expect it. When our second child entered college one year apart from the first child, our “need” was greater. We had no expectations again. I opened the FA letter to D2’s dream school, and our eyes popped out of our head. Could not believe it. Did not even realize her school had merit aid on top of need based aid. I called the school to ask the basis of the award, I was that shocked. Never felt entitled, nor expected a cent, nor did our kids. In fact, we would have sent them to the same colleges, no matter what the colleges had offered in their package.</p>
<p>People can win merit awards and need based awards and not have expected it. My kids both won scholarships at graduation from college! Had no idea such a thing existed either. Both earned these awards and had no idea they would be winning some money at college graduation. It was not based on need.</p>
<p>Soozie,</p>
<p>My comments were not directed at you. Please don’t take comments so personally. I am more concerned about the students (including many who have posted on cc) who think they are entitled to get money for college because they are poor, or because their parents can’t afford to send them to the school they want to attend. Some of these kids sound like good candidates, but in reality they may not be much more spectacular than yours or mine. </p>
<p>1sokkermom, I know your posts are not directed at me personally, but I am speaking up as a parent of students who received both need and merit based aid. </p>
<p>I also still don’t understand your concern in post 156 either. I am glad that students who are poor (we are not) receive aid. I don’t care if they are more spectacular or not than my own kid. </p>
<p>As well, your son and my own kids went to very selective universities and ONE aspect of what made the experience great is the diversity of students and so financial aid helps to make that possible. I would not want just rich kids to be able to attend, in other words. I value the mix of students these universities can admit utilizing financial aid to help achieve that.</p>
<p>Not to mention, they made it from a disadvantageous footing, no SAT tutors, no private school tuition, probably underfunded piublic school, less security at home, and many others. Spectacular or not, they made it. Aren’t you glad they didn’t veer off and get destructive?</p>
<p>“It is disheartening to find out that all your hard work has paid off so well in the eyes of Fafsa! I guess in the end, your children will do well for your having set such a good example.”</p>
<p>As opposed to the lazy parents of those financial aid kids. </p>
<p>Why begrudge these kids financial aid awards? It’s way easier for my kids to be successful. My DH has a PHD and I have a masters. If you grow up in an environment and a culture that prioritized education and makes it part of the fabric of life, it’s way easier to be successful. So, you folks that think your kids are better than those financial aid kids because they have higher stats, get over yourselves.</p>
<p>Amen Soozievt! Helping poor students attend a college they cannot afford is sort of socialistic but what’s wrong with that? It’s not the kid’s fault the parents are poor. Expensive private colleges should not be available only to those who can afford it, otherwise “merit” would be defined by family income rather than the accomplishments of individual students. That’s the problem with the American “system” now. </p>
<p>I think it’s wrong to force equality of outcome-that would be almost communistic. But I think it is the American way to strive for equality of opportunity, then individual accomplishment or merit will determine the outcome.</p>