<p>So guys, I really need some advice. This is going to sound a bit awkward, but I hope you guys are open enough to understand what I am about to say. I graduated with an accounting degree from University of California Riverside about a month ago. During my university tenure, I had no internships but worked a minimum wage job as a stocker (part-time) while attending university. I suffer from really low self-esteem due to having really big ears (dumbo ears) and a really small head/skull/face (thus the ears looking even bigger). In essence, I really believe that If I have cosmetic surgery performed on my ears (otoplasty) it would raise my confidence significantly and help with career-related goals (my dad is willing to pay for the surgery). The surgery post-op requires about a week to two weeks off from work (mainly a week).</p>
<p>Here is the dilemma, I would have to wait until november/december of this year to have the surgery performed (Mainly because I took a drug called accutane for my acne in march, and you cannot have any cosmetic surgery until you are 6 months off of being off the drug). I cannot really pursue an accounting job because there would be no way to take time off until after I am employed in that job for a year. Thus, my question is.... should I just work a random minimum wage job until I have my surgery performed and then start looking for jobs in my profession? Or should I look for internships (It would probably be much easier to take a week or two off during my internship)? I do not want to wait a year longer to have this surgery (i.e. if I were to land an accounting job, I would probably have to wait a year to get the surgery).</p>
<p>OR, if I do get an accounting job, is there anyway to have a cosmetic procedure performed 3 to 4 months into the job? Can I take sick leave without pay, or will they fire me?</p>
<p>Another issue is that from my understanding, if you do not find a job within a year... you are pretty much out of luck (most likely will need to get a grad degree). Is this true?</p>
<p>Thanks for your guys time and consideration!</p>
<p>Hey.
Firstly, know that’s it’s okay to have surgery. Don’t listen to those people that tell you to embrace your ears because they don’t know crap admit what your going through. I’d suggest before applying to the job, talk to them about your situation. Unfortunately, we cannot tell you if the job would left you to defer your surgery. But you could be surprised to find that they’d be willing to give you a break. If the is don’t torn out to be in your favor, I would avoid the minimum wage job because obviously, an internship would do you much better. Perhaps you can even go on vacation until then. There’s nothing wrong with that 
Best of luck with your surgery.</p>
<p>thanks for the quick reply!</p>
<p>I would love to go on vacation until the surgery, but the thing is (and I am not sure how true this is) but supposedly if you do not find a job within a year (for your respective profession) you will most likely be out of hope and would need to get a grad degree. So if I wait until november/december to have the surgery, and then start looking for a job, I will only have 6 months to get that job.</p>
<p>But then again, having my confidence restored is much more important long-term then some random accounting job.</p>
<p>My father completely understands this, and he probably would not mind if I wait until the surgery to start looking for jobs (but I am sure if the surgery does not increase my confidence, he will be angry with me). My mother, on the other hand is not open-minded at all. She has no idea that I am going to have this surgery performed but if I told her she would make so much “noise” and problems so that I change my mind (she has anxiety issues and mental problems).</p>
<p>I wish I could have it done now, but the accutane messed that up for me</p>
<p>Accutane is really dangerous, so I’ve heard. You’re pretty lucky to have a dad that’s so supportive. Mine’s a tyrannical potato. Anyway, who says you wont get a job?</p>
<p>Some people I spoke to who have been working for a while said that to me. Don’t know how true it is.</p>
<p>I am lucky that I have a supportive dad. I am sorry to hear that your dad is like that.</p>
<p>I just hate how my mom is completely against cosmetic surgery. She has a beautiful face, she has no idea how it feels like to have a deformity</p>
<p>There is no hard rule that you must find a job within a year - however, to HR folk, they will want to know what you’ve been doing in that time and you’d better have a good response (internships, furthering your education, etc.). If you say you post-poned a job due to a medically unnecessary cosmetic procedure, they will not look kindly on you. Same for people who were laid off of their jobs - looks better to have any job than to ride unemployment compensation for 18 months. </p>
<p>Look for work (you should have started this prior to graduation). Do not mention your need for time off in the initial interview/pre-screening. Wait until you are being seriously considered. Then let them know that several months from now you will be having a medical procedure done and would like to know whether unpaid time for one week (or paid time depending on their benefits in the first year) is feasible for that time of year. You do not need to tell them what the procedure is for, and it is inappropriate (and in many cases illegal) for them to ask. One week is not a big deal. There are many people who already have planned/paid for vacations who are looking for work and employers who really want you will be flexible.</p>
<p>I will also say that although I have no issue with your desire to have the surgery, do not expect it to magically enhance your confidence. Self-esteem is psychological, not physical. In addition to your surgery you should work on your attitude toward yourself and your abilities. Maybe even consider some counseling to get you in the right mind set to accept yourself - regardless of whether you have the surgery. You are fortune to have a parent willing to support your decision and assist you with it financially, but you also need to be willing to accept yourself and what you have to offer. </p>
<p>Mothers will always think their children are perfect. Do what is best for you, but as I said, don’t expect to wake up after the surgery with a new found confidence. You might indeed be that much more confident, but it should be because you’re a smart, talented individual; not because your ears are now perfectly shaped.</p>
<p>nova, thanks for the response, I appreciate it.</p>
<p>Regarding the ear and self-esteem thing, I am not aiming for perfection (I have other flaws that I have accepted, like acne and pigmentation related to it, dark eye circles etc). My ears make me look like a monkey. I just want my ears to be “normal” and proportionate to my face. I honestly think this will make my confidence sky-rocket and I will be able to improve on my talents and skills. </p>
<p>You may ask why I am not doing that right now (i.e. improving on my skills/talents)? Because I lack confidence.</p>
<p>Also, I think its best to have this done now because in the future when I do have a real job, I won’t have much time.</p>