inferiority complex?

<p>DMW, I am sorry to hear about your friend. There is no question that Harvard is not for everyone. Nor is Yale or Princeton or any other school. I have known people at each of Harvard, Yale and Princeton who have been miserable, including some who have been sufficiently miserable to withdraw and not return at each. But I really believe these are the rare exception (a belief supported by the stats on graduation rates at these schools - typically in the high 90's). And having attended both Harvard and Yale and knowing many others at each, I continue to believe that the two schools are far more similar than different. </p>

<p>CB, I agree (and vice versa).</p>

<p>Haukim and DMW:</p>

<p>I agree with Cosar. You can certainly find examples of people who are unhappy at Harvard, but you both are pointing to outliers and presenting them as "ideal types" (in the Weberian sense). This is unhelpful and misleading to high school students who are considering the college. Likewise, I'm sure you can find some people are Yale who are bitter about not getting into Harvard, but I would never suggest that this is the case for the whole student body. </p>

<p>We should all try to be a little more thoughtful when posting here. I found CC very helpful when I was looking at colleges, but I first had to learn which posts were honest reflections and which were intentionally deceptive.</p>

<p>I chose Yale over Harvard and Princeton.
My best friend chose Princeton over Harvard and Yale.
My cousin chose Harvard over Yale and Princeton.
You know what? We loved our choices. That's all there is to it. That's all that counts. We've never regretted our choices.
Visit, experience the schools, know what they offer. Forget about rankings and percentages and yields. Choose well. Enjoy.</p>

<p>I had a very similar experience to DMW at Harvard last weekend. I stayed with a friend from high school, and his suite of four people spent most of Friday evening complaining about Harvard and describing a culture of discontent. I understand that this is not a representation of the student body at large - I know a significant number of people at Harvard and indeed practically went there myself, I liked it and so do plenty of others - but it is the sort of thing I simply have not encountered at Yale. I remain convinced that there are unhappy people here, but only because of the statistical necessity. I haven't met any.</p>

<p>Cosar, you mention knowing people at Yale so miserable that they withdrew. This is what baffles me. They must exist, but I know hundreds of people, and the vast majority are head-over-heels for Yale. Yale pride is ubiquitous and contagious. Furthermore, though some people are not perpetually gleeful, they are by no means miserable. I know of two transfers from Yale this past year, and their reasons for leaving had nothing to do with a Yale itself. </p>

<p>And while my sample size is, admittedly, too small to make a conclusive statement, I'd like to emphasize that I spend a great deal of time discussing with people what exactly makes Yale great. I, for one, am powerless to explain it, and it sounds utterly hogswallop when presented so plainly- but people are just happy. It's in the atmosphere. And that atmosphere was not readily apparent to me at Harvard. Maybe it would be for others, but that demonstrates that the schools are more different than some might suspect. </p>

<p>I guess my ultimate point is that I greatly desire to be introduced to a contingent of miserable Yalies - honestly - so that I can understand better the type of person that would love to be here. It can't be everyone. right?</p>

<p>As I hope I made clear above, the vast majority of people I've known at Yale (as at Harvard and Princeton) have been very happy there. The unhappy ones are the exceptions. I don't think I can really generalize about them - there were individual circumstances at play in each case. Perhaps the one lesson I would draw from their experiences is that students who need a more hand-holding environment might be better off elsewhere. But even that "lesson" has its limits. It's not as though there's a bright line that separates students who need a hand-holding environment from students who don't, and even a student who is more comfortable with a hand-holding environment might find it just the right thing to be pulled out of his or her comfort zone a little.</p>

<p>In any event, I think the admissions office at each of these schools does a good job of admitting students that they believe will be right for the school. So if you're admitted to one, the odds are very high that you'll be happy if you go there. And if you're admitted to more than one, the odds are very high that you can't go wrong with the choice.</p>

<p>First off, I admitted my original post was a somewhat unfair jab, but it is also naive to dismiss the point off hand. Generalizations are usually founded in truth. Let's examine what Harvard students have to say about the matter:</p>

<p><a href="http://www.thecrimson.com/article.aspx?ref=515067%5B/url%5D"&gt;http://www.thecrimson.com/article.aspx?ref=515067&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p>

<p><a href="http://www.thecrimson.com/article.aspx?ref=350153%5B/url%5D"&gt;http://www.thecrimson.com/article.aspx?ref=350153&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p>

<p><a href="http://www.thecrimson.com/article.aspx?ref=350154%5B/url%5D"&gt;http://www.thecrimson.com/article.aspx?ref=350154&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p>

<p>You'll find many more articles with similar sentiments. While this should have no significant impact on which school would provide a more fulfilling and enjoyable experience for an individual student ( I believe I'd have a great time at Harvard ), it does show a trend of dissatisfaction. You won't find similar articles on the YDN (whether Crimson writers are simply more critical of their own social environment is a distinct possibility).</p>