<p>I'm not very confident in myself, and my self esteem isn't very high. I'm more of an introvert, and do not have many friends. I am a little bit anti-social.
I am going to be a sophomore in college. I spent my first year of college at home, attending community college, but this fall, I am tranferring to a state school 2 hours away. </p>
<p>Because I'm not very confident, and because I never really came out of my shell, I'm so much more than nervous to go away to school - I'm petrified.
I'm scared that I'm not going to make any friends and I'll want to come home. I'm also scared that if I do make friends and like the college, I'll still be really home sick and if I come home from winter break for a month, I'll want to stay home and not go back. </p>
<p>I never embraced high school and the time I spent at community college. I just attended there to get by. But I want to embrace the college I'm transferring to. I'm just really scared that I won't make any friends. </p>
<p>Can anyone give me advice? Has anyone else felt like this? I do want to join a sorority, so maybe that will make me more comfortable, but I'm still really scared.</p>
<p>Yarr!! That’s what a cat should be! How dare you use cat’s name?? JK!</p>
<p>All I can tell you is don’t be scare. The truth is no one going to care if you did this or that. The easiest way is to do what you like back home, got any hobbies? Say if you like swimming then go swim, you will make new friends there. You have to find someone who shares the same interests as you do. Ever wonder why guys always try to find ways to ask girls out? Or why she refuses to go out with you? The answer is you don’t have to ask, its easier when you share the same interest and she finds you trustworthy.
This is the way to go. I’m not sure how anti-social you are, and it varies on different people. I’m anti-social when my friends call me to go party with them Fri/Sat/Sun every week. Dam, I can’t do that, I have better things to do other than partying. They might say" ahh, your not a geek anymore, why you such a bookworm?" Look, they defined me as a bookworm and anti-social. But am I really is in reality? Some people might freak out when talking with opposite sex or just people in general. Then the only cure is stop staying at home, go out meet new people, volunteer, whatever that you get a chance to interact with others. You WILL get comfortable. The more you interact with others, the greater chance you will get along with new people. There’s no magic in this. You might also get a job, work study, which you have to deal with new people. Just find ways to interact with people.</p>
<p>Back in H.S. I were little shy too. I have this job requires 2 hours traffic everyday. I may not be a handsome guy, but I usually encounter hot girls sits/stands next to me. And I would get REALLY nervous and sweat comes out all over my body. And you know they can feel the heat when you sweat. I was like ooh god, they know I’m nervous and scared. They will think what’s wrong with this guy. Creepy? You know what, the things is when I get more chances of sitting or standing with them I actually get better and eventually no sweat, not nervous, nothing. It was when I met my gf and things start getting better. Dude, this might be a long post, but I hope this really helps because NO ONE cares ones shyness, anti-social, not communicating well, and introvert whatever. In real life, when you graduate, they will just move on when seeing this. They can’t fix your problems but you. This thread pretty much reflects it, its not people can’t help. But only yourself.</p>
<p>Joining a sorority is a good idea! (or rushing, at the very least). It’s a great way to meet a lot of people, and if you pledge you have a built-in group of friends! Some schools have activities fairs in the beginning of the year where student groups can run booths to give out flyers, etc. to help recruit new members. Get involved in something new, or even an old hobby that you want to continue at school. Forcing yourself to come out of your shell a little bit will help a lot in the long run.</p>
<p>You know what, I am semi-like you. I am more introverted than extroverted, but for some reason people like me a lot. I have people calling me all the time to hang out, they text me all the time to hang out, etc, and I usually always decline (obviously, i wouldn’t be doing so well if I had been hanging out with them versus studying). I NEVER change myself for others. I don’t let them walk all over me. I let them know what I am about. I can count my friends on one hand. I don’t need many “friends”, because when I had a lot of “friends” A LOT of backstabbers make their way through. Once I told those people to f*off and get out of my life and I found out who my REAL friends are, I felt better and actually found BETTER friends. You really don’t need a lot of friends, you just need a few good ones. I am transferring to Nor Cal from So Cal. I know NOBODY at my new university (in fact, I am older than most people who are transferring). I am, like everyone else who is moving far away, SCARED about not getting along with people, feeling alone, etc. I am not too scared though, because I know from experience why you don’t need MANY Friends and that I can make friends if I really wanted to. But the truth is, being yourself and confident in who you are will attract people who are like minded to you. Honestly, people know when your being fake. People use people who are being fake. Don’t be fake (AKA-nice to EVERYONE. I been there, it didnt work and I was very depressed and self detrimental). It could be your age. I am 22 now. Back when I was 18, 19, 20… I was so different. Scared of people, was basically a door mat. Then one day it hit me that people were walking all over me and if they don’t like me for ME…then hell, I won’t like them! Ever since then, people have no problem talking to me because they SENSE who I am. If you act like a suck up, no one is going to like you. I am being very real with you right now. Do NOT be fake. Do NOT be overly nice. When people step on your toes, let them know. People respect that, and RESPECT makes friends.</p>
<p>Joining a sorority may possibly be a good idea, but paying to have friends leads to being housed with people who may not like you. I would suggest joining clubs, where people are more real. Join ones that only interest you, not just because “the hottest guys/girls” are in them. Hell, I am joining the running club at the school I am going to go to because I LOVE to run! Who cares if “cool” people are there!</p>