Is anybody else sacred to become an "adult"?

I am ready to go to college, am in the process of buying a car, and will possibly rent an apartment for my first year as a college student. But, I’m pretty scared to go out in the real world, you have to be responsible for your own actions and it’s a huge responsibility.

This mostly applies to CLASS OF 2017 since we are on our way to freedom. But, is anyone else scared? To leave high school friendships behind, knowing you’ll prob never see them until your hs reunion in 2060 when we’re all wrinkly lol! It’s just kinda scary, but life has to pull you from the wrist sometimes and be like “go out there and do that!” How do you all feel about you knowing gulp growing up?

You don’t have to – people are more connected than ever before, and you can stay in touch if both people in the friendship make an effort. Some of my HS friendships have become more distant / grown apart, but my relationship from high school is still going strong 3.5 years after it started. Takes work.

What I’m scared about is working on my own far from home this summer. Gulp indeed…

Exactly! I’m scared I’ll put in effort to try to keep in touch with hs relationships but they won’t. Eventually leading our friendship into a downward spiral disappearing from existence. No job will hire me either bc I’m 17! They all want 18 year oldsI will be a 17 year old college freshmen. Ughhh And don’t even get me started on my parents!

You could still be a kid mentally.

As an adult, I am in frequent touch with many of my HS friends.
You will also make new friends.

Re: Adulting

This is why most freshman live in dorms…so they dont’ have to learn complete independence all at once.

Talk to your parents about things you need to do and things you need to learn to do.

Do you know how to write a check? Make an electronic payment through your bank app?
Do you know how to clean your bathroom? Clean dishes? Wash clothes?
Do you know what to do if something breaks?
Do you know how to cook? Shop on a budget?
Do you know how to maintain your car? When to change oil or know whn you need new brakes or tires or what to do when the Check Engine light goes on?

I am still planning on maintaining high school friendships. It’s a lot easier nowadays when we have so much technology

Two of my best friends I’ve been buddies with for over 40 years–we met in middle school and live in 3 separate states–NM, CA and HI. My husband’s best friend has known him since grade school–over 65 years ago! Keep the friendships you want and make new ones!

I recommend living in a dorm for the first year, so that you don’t have to deal with rent, bills, shopping, cooking, etc. Why not do a more gradual transition? That transition is part of the traditional college experience. If you feel you are biting off more than you can chew, take smaller bites!

At least it sounds like you have that option, because you said you might “possibly” rent an apartment. At lower income levels, if the college does not help with room and board through your financial aid and your family cannot, maybe you have to take on more responsibilities earlier, if in the area you go to college that could be cheaper; I would guess that more often room and board would be cheaper? But if you don’t NEED to, take your time!

I am 47 now. I left for college as a pampered only child whose mother combed my hair and set out my clothes until the summer before college, never mind my doing laundry or getting places on my own. I grew up, gradually. But I will share that I never felt like a “real grown up” until I had my son at age 30. I always felt a little like a child playing at being a grown up. But the game of being an adult was fun! I remember, in college, doing laundry for the first time, using transportation on my own for the first time, buying school books, etc. And then, in graduate school, that first apartment, the first meal I cooked, the first real non-summer job interview, etc. And marriage and a house purchase were surreal-- awesome parts of the game of being grown up!

Though they may sound scary beforehand, when you actually have to do all these ‘grown up’ things, you find that you are ready!

P.S. As other posters have noted, there is no reason not to stay in touch with your high school friends. My best friend now (other than my spouse and relatives) went to high school with me. We kept in touch even though she went to college in Virginia and I went to college in Massachusetts. Friendships that matter last.

bopper, thanks for these questions, I have realized I don’t know how to do many of them.

thegreyking you are very correct, I think I might be rushing things. The reason I want to live in an apartment is because a close friend and I would share the rent/bills etc. Our dorm room application is now closed, my parents didn’t want me to move out since I could easily commute. They wouldn’t put down the payment and refused to sign anything concerning the dorm.

They don’t know me and my friend have this plan, otherwise they would be angry. They always tell me I can’t hold that much responsibility. I just feel like leaving ASAP they always argue with me at least once a day. They say I can’t cook or clean, pay bills etc. But, I can clean and I can learn how to cook easily.

Call your parents regularly and keep a line of communication with them open.
Learn what to do if you need medical help.
Learn how to manage your expenses against whatever income / allowance you have
Don’t be afraid to ask for help when you need it.