Is it true that I can ask a college to match other aid offers I've gotten?

Paying for College
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<p>My D has been accepted to her top choice school with a university merit scholarship that is much less than we expected.</p>

<p>What was the basis of expecting larger merit? Had someone in the dept or univ said something about a larger award?</p>

<p>Mauiluver…I don’t quite understand your post. What if the COA of each school, what were you offered at each school (grants, merit, loans, workstudy), and what is your EFC? </p>

<p>It sounds like School B gave you $37k…What were you expecting? or needing?</p>

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<p>When a family has financial concerns (medical bills, mortgage payments, multiple kids in college, job loss…etc) it is very important to cast a wide net in terms of applications. This should include schools that are affordable either due to cost or guaranteed aid. It certainly is OK for these students to apply to some schools that are financial reaches, as long as they understand that if the money doesn’t become available from the school, it cannot be a matriculation choice.</p>

<p>Unfortunately there are families in these tight financial situations, and the schools do not offer substantial aid. If that becomes the case, the student has the options of attending a local CC for a couple of years to save money…or the the student can take a gap year during which he works and takes NO college classes. Then he can apply next year as an incoming freshman to schools that are going to be within the financial parameters of his family’s finances.</p>

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<p>I applied and received acceptance to a college through their early decision program so I’m essentially tied in with attending. I have already accepted and paid a deposit as well. I have not yet received a FA package but once I do, is it even worth it trying to negotiate? I had to withdraw my other applications due to the ED process so I have no basis for FA comparison. What do you guys think?</p>

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<p>Mom2CollegeKids, the costs were 37, 44, 47, DS refused to apply to additional schools, we warned him many times, as usual we were told we didn’t know what we were talking about. The Fafsa came back at about where I thought it would (20.5). School 2 is known for meeting aid, obviously this year for us they didn’t, school 1 gave even more than expected. We just had a discussion with DS, he blames us but he’s considering school 1 more seriously. I have tried to get him to take a gap year, apply for scholarships, get a job, join ROTC, Americorp, City Year, apply to schools that offer merit, etc… and he has been resistant to all of it. I don’t think his story is going to have a good outcome for this year… He just wants to go to college and think about the costs later, 160K in loans is looking fine to him, not to us obviously.</p>

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<p>Maui, with regards to the finances, YOU are in the drivers seat. Your son cannot get loans for the shortfall without your cooperation. If your family can’t afford this, just say NO. It won’t be fun having to do so, but it would be far worse to assume debt that you don’t feel comfortable doing.</p>

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<p>Mauiluver,if you used the PROFILE, did you note your daughters boarding school expenses?
Colleges may see that as an optional expense, and add it back into available monies. They also may expect you to use some of your home equity for college tuition.
Its a shock, I know.</p>

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<p>*We’ve had a few offers come in 20K, 37K, 38K (subtract out 5 in student loans from each school number), school 2 came nowhere close to their net price calculator… School 1 is in line with the FAFSA, schools 2 & 3 are willing to take another look but school 3 has already said they don’t have a large endowment and don’t offer large packages. Unfortunately our C only applied to a couple of schools and only the first school was one that offered merit he doesn’t want to go to school 1 however…</p>

<p>I have no idea how to approach school 2, they seem to have more of an endowment and I have no idea what happened with the net price calculator

  • </p>

<p>…**.the costs were 37, 44, 47, DS refused to apply to additional schools, we warned him many times, as usual we were told we didn’t know what we were talking about. **The Fafsa came back at about where I thought it would (20.5).

  • &lt;/p&gt;

<p>Ok…time for a sit down with this son…make sure your H is there at the same time. Remain calm. Ahead of time write out the FACTs…that you told him to apply to more schools, that you were told that you didn’t know what you were talking about, that you were concerned about cost, etc.</p>

<p>* **
School 2 is known for meeting aid, obviously this year for us they didn’t,** school 1 gave even more than expected. We just had a discussion with DS, ** he blames us ** but he’s considering school 1 more seriously. I have tried to get him to take a gap year, apply for scholarships, get a job, join ROTC, Americorp, City Year, apply to schools that offer merit, etc… and he has been resistant to all of it. I don’t think his story is going to have a good outcome for this year…
*</p>

<p>What school is School 2? </p>

<p>What do you mean by: “he blames us”??? He blames you for what? for his grades? For his aid pkg? For what? </p>

<p>*
He just wants to go to college and think about the costs later, 160K in loans is looking fine to him, not to us obviously.*</p>

<p>Thankfully, he can’t take out those loans by himself. IF you sit down with your son, make it clear that you’re not going to cosign any loans so that idea is off the table. Tell him that HE can ONLY borrow the following amounts by himself:</p>

<p>5500 frosh
6500 soph
7500 jr
7500 sr</p>

<p>When you tell him that you won’t be cosigning loans, he probably will have a tantrum. Let him. Leave the room. Don’t stay there listening to any childish rants. He needs to own the results of his decisions (his grades, his narrow school list, etc).</p>

<p>It sounds (to me) that he’s bullying you. When he’s blaming you, is your H present?</p>

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<p>Im confused, Mauiluver, are you paying more for your daughters high school, than you are willing to pay for your sons college?
No wonder he is irritated.
<a href=“http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/prep-school-parents/1368945-how-do-colleges-look-boarding-school-expense-younger-child.html#post14665236[/url]”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/prep-school-parents/1368945-how-do-colleges-look-boarding-school-expense-younger-child.html#post14665236&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

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<p>I’m impressed that someone with an EFC of $20k can afford to send a child to boarding school. Aren’t those schools like $30k+ per year? </p>

<p>Did the son apply to FAFSA-only schools? IF so, are you sure that one of those schools “meets need”? What FASFA only school promises to meet need?</p>

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<p>*Aren’t those schools like $30k+ per year? *</p>

<p>For boarding school it is $51,410 for the 2013-2014 school year.
Day schools are in the $30K range though.</p>

<p>I dont want others reading the thread to assume that all schools expect families to pay way above their means. Many schools are fairly reasonable when arriving at EFC, although schools that use PROFILE will use additional information about expenses, not as a way for you to lower your obligation, but for them to identify additional sources of funding.
Dont feel bad- it took me a while to catch on too.</p>

<p>I can see why you want your son to chose a FAFSA only school, but why would you be willing to pay more for high school for your daughter than college for your son?</p>

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<p>I can see why you want your son to chose a FAFSA only school</p>

<p>Why would that be?</p>

<p>If boarding school costs that much, how does a family with a $20k EFC afford that? I guess the D may have gotten a scholarship to cover the costs, but didn’t Mauiluver want the schools to take the boarding school cost into account?</p>

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<p>Luckily our daughter got a FA package that resulted in a cost that was less than the local private day school (and that school is nowhere near 30 grand). They have been very generous and did re-evaluate her costs, so no we aren’t even close to paying less for him than for his sibling, and we’ve been willing to go five grand above the Fafsa for him. We are willing to stretch the budget as far as we can but the mortgage and taxes still have to be paid and my regular treatments are 500/month after insurance (plus all the other treatments). We have kept things quite equal between the two kids throughout the years. There’s also no guarantee she will be returning in September but she’s an athlete and a harpist as well as a good student and her school values those things, thus the package they gave her, we are very grateful, and that is an understatement.</p>

<p>Mom2CollegeKids, DS only applied to the schools he wanted, school 3 we KNEW did not give aid for someone with a 2.95, it was a surprise when they gave him 4 grand. He always felt his SAT’s were high enough he didn’t have to worry about GPA (he took them in 8th grade then October Junior year and got a 1980. (some schools will give merit with high-ish SAT’s and a 2.95 but largely he wasn’t interested in searching them out, he never used Naviance or any other publication online or otherwise to find schools)</p>

<p>If it were up to DS we would sell the house to pay for his college, you are right when you say he has bullied us thus far, that is true and I’m going to take your suggestion and write those things down. I’m also going to suggest AGAIN that he applies to at least two rolling admission schools we know are affordable. If DS had put in the academic effort the first 3 years of high school that he’s now putting in now he wouldn’t be in this situation, and had he applied for scholarships and put more effort into his search (besides applying where his friends are) I think he would have had a better outcome. The sad thing is he’s finally come around to being the student he should have been, doing the extra curricular things we begged him to do… it literally kills me. I’ll have school 2 re-evaluate his situation. Short of his applying to the two schools that will come in between 20-25K (plus student loans) or if school 2 comes in closer to the net price calculator (which was around 25 plus loans) he has to go to school 1 where he has to prove himself academically (and then transfer after a year if he does the work). I wish he had done it all along. He is so capable. </p>

<p>Our daughter has been told the same thing about school, she needs merit or scholarships and good grades, no “this is good enough” grades (she wants to be a low level Div. 1 or Div 2 recruited athlete or play her harp) and we will pay around the same figure as for him. A lot depends on medical however, it seemed like it had leveled off but unfortunately my costs spiked in August and now we are at a juncture where I need to figure out what I want to do with my ongoing medical and how much more I want to put into it, it’s really serious, I don’t want my expenses to take away from my kids but on the other hand if I don’t go for treatment, my outcome will be terrible. I did speak with DS tonight and one thing he did say was chilling, he wonders when he will get sick. I had no idea he still felt like this, his sister got very sick 4 years ago but she battled back after 2 years, she lives life every day and has her plans laid out, she took it on like a trooper. Back then my son said the same thing about his getting sick, she recovered (there’s no guarantee she will not get sick again), but he has remained healthy and it is everybody’s hope that he did not get the gene (which they have yet to identify).</p>

<p>I know this is really lengthy, but this is our entire situation, I think nothing was left out. Except now as I write this, I wonder if my son spent the first 3 years of high school with this worry of his health taking over? I had no idea… I’m glad I’m writing this out, it’s really clarifying where my son might be coming from. I knew he was scared to leave home, that’s the only thing I knew of for certain… we obviously have more issues than I was thinking, I just thought he was being hard headed as teens can be. I’m really conflicted now or I should say MORE conflicted. With the way he’s acted I’ve thought a gap year would be a good option. He’s visiting school 1 the first weekend of April, so I suspect an idea of a gap year would be better received if he truly did not like it. I just have to say I’m thankful school 1 gave us such a wonderful package (but it’s not the school he wants) Our opinion is that he can take his undergrad biology anywhere and focus more on graduate school. But he does realize he has to have a job at some point and that some point is now. I hope all this makes sense.</p>

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<p>All I can say is this is my second child going to college. If my daughter does not get the package we need for her to attend the school she wants to go to I have no prob calling and asking for more. It can never hurt to ask and tell what you need. If they cant do it you have lost nothing.</p>

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<p>GCmom, have you found the net price calculators to be accurate? We had for the two schools (1 and 3) but school 2 is DRASTICALLY off… We could even go to school 2 to meet with them, they are actually very close to us? I just wonder if I made a mistake there.</p>

<p>EmeraldKitty, I just wanted to comment that the post I made last July was BEFORE the extraordinary medical event that essentially took us out and resulted in her school re-evaluating her further for us. Now that my health is so shaky we don’t really know how to answer the questions about what is next.</p>

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<p>I’ve never used the net price calculators. Colleges use so many methods and factors to determine need. Some colleges claim to meet need some dont. What people dont understand when they start this process is that the so called financial safety state college may end up costing you more than the private college. Meeting with them could never hurt.</p>

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<p>net price calculators to be accurate? We had for the two schools (1 and 3) but school 2 is DRASTICALLY off</p>

<p>What do you mean? Do you mean that the NPC suggests that you’d get good aid, but the actual pkg was bad? or what?</p>

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<p>Yes, 1 and 3 were really dead on, but school 2 showed more than a ten thousand dollar increase (it might have been 15 actually) which is making me wonder if I filled out something incorrectly. We had friends who went to the school last year and they in fact came in around what the NPC showed… out of all the schools I like 2 the best, DS likes 3 but he now realizes it is completely out of the realm of possibility. None of these schools took DD’s tuition into account but as someone indicated the schools they looked at gave an allowance of 10K so that should be fine.</p>

<p>Thanks GCmom, I think I will have DH bring me to the college so I can talk with them about what I might have done wrong (if anything). I’m the one that does the finances, but DH has to start taking care of some of these things… we were just talking about that tonight actually.</p>

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<p>Maui, didn’t you submit the SAME FAFSA to all three schools? The thing you are looking at is how the schools
USE that FAFSA information to determine awarding of institutional need based aid. This varies wildly from college to college. </p>

<p>I agree that your son needs to broaden his horizons to include affordable schools. And I also agree that you should not be bullied into taking loans you do NOT want to take.</p>

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<p>We did apply using the same FAFSA to all three schools. I was really looking at the net price calculator hoping that number was correct, but to have it come out so wildly different is a stunner.</p>

<p>I can’t emphasize enough how correct you are, DS should have broadened his horizons, but he refused, not believing what I was saying about financial aid and loans, so here we are. I can’t make him apply anywhere, but later today I will again suggest to him to apply to the two schools he can get into (I believe they have rolling admissions). He has to prove himself in college, and then maybe he will find a college he likes that will take a chance on him. I realize he put himself in this situation by not listening, now I’m trying to figure out if we have a way to help him that doesn’t include us paying 40 grand for his first year (thank god for school 1).</p>

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<p>mauiluver, I’m confused. Why aren’t you calling school 2’s financial aid office and asking them for a review of your financial aid package? Fax them the offers from the other two schools and ask them is there a reason that their package is so different? What’s the worst that could happen?</p>