Is this college trip a waste?

<p>This weekend, we are headed to Rice University. It is a 2 day thing, so my daughter will end up missing school on Monday. The high school only allows 2 misses out of the entire year.</p>

<p>She does not know yet if she wants to major in music, French, Asian studies, maybe a science, and also maybe do pre-med. So, it is pretty much wide open at this point.</p>

<p>Rice does not mix the music school with the rest of the university. You either major in music or you do not. So, if she continues with the idea that she wants to major in music and still do anything else, Rice is not the school for her. As of yet, she is completely unsure.</p>

<p>Her school is going down there in the spring. I had thought she could go in the spring with her school orchestra and have a look around. And then later, when she has narrowed things down more, if Rice is still on her list, we could look at it. Since she is also interested in schools like Carnegie Mellon, Carleton College, St. Olaf, and I might be headed to to Minnesota later this year, and my husband goes to Pittsburg on occasion, it seems to make more sense to save the 2 days she is allowed. </p>

<p>Do you think this trip would be a waste? Because I am feeling like she is just loving looking at colleges so much, she is not giving much thought as to which ones might actually be a fit for her, going in to it. And we are not of unlimited resources to do all these trips. And even if we were, the high school will only allow 2 misses.</p>

<p>That being said, it would be nice if Rice worked out as it is so close by. It is still a 5 hour drive, but everything feels like it is forever away from where we live.</p>

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<p>What happens after the third missed day?</p>

<p>I think you left it too late.</p>

<p>To talk your daughter out of this trip, you would have to have found out details about the upcoming orchestra trip and whether she would have time (and permission) to separate from the group and visit the campus on her own while she is there for that occasion. It’s too late to find that out now.</p>

<p>Also, your daughter may have already spoken with teachers about any work or tests she will miss by being absent on Monday (or she may do this at school today). And she has probably announced the trip to her friends. Backing out of the trip might embarrass her.</p>

<p>So I think that at this point the decision to visit Rice has been made. And it may prove to be a valuable trip. Your daughter is going to need to think through her choices of programs and majors. As you may realize by now, there are two kinds of music majors – the professional kind and the liberal arts kind. If she wants to major in music but pursue a non-music career, such as medicine, she may want the liberal arts type of music major, if she chooses that major at all. You may want to make a point during the trip of asking (or suggesting that she ask) about whether it is possible to double-major in music and another subject at Rice and whether it is possible to major in music and still fulfill the pre-med requirements. The answers to these questions may be informative (and they’re not necessarily obvious).</p>

<p>Does your daughter’s school allow for a certain number of school visits for music auditions. Perhaps she can slot in the missed day for a chance to do a private lesson with a member of the Shepard SOM’s faculty (although time is short). It could be that she will need to do a pre-screen for her instrument when she applies and having played for a faculty member will help her decide if she wants to go through what is a tedious application process in the first place. Also, has she considered Oberlin?</p>

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<p>I have seen several posts from you along these lines recently. It seems like you are not really taking the advice you have already been given… sit her down and make a list of criteria, identify a list of schools that match them, and tell her which ones you WILL subsidize a visit to. As it sounds like you will be paying the bill, you need to step up to this task or she will continue to run over you.</p>

<p>Regarding two misses for the entire year, take a careful look at the school calendar. My kids have quite a few 3 day weekends and one four day weekend during the year, so you may be able to use those. If she is a senior this year, then you need to find ways to do this during the fall (so your timeframe is indeed short). Also, to be blunt, what recourse does the school have if she misses more days, especially if she works with the teachers to complete any work ahead of time?</p>

<p>One comment on your Minnesota visit, you might consider Lawrence in Wisconsin (which has a conservatory) might be a better fit than Carleton (which is not really a school with big music reputation).</p>

<p>Even the school says it only allows two misses for college visits, our experience was that they were actually more liberal than that for good students.</p>

<p>We’ll be there, too. Ds’s school allows two EXCUSED absences for college visits. Is that what you mean? If so, so what if your dd misses more? Because of flights, visiting Carleton and St. Olaf will mean at least one day missed if you go during the week. I’m a Carl parent, so I speak from experience.</p>

<p>Agree with the Lawrence reference.</p>

<p>This lurking Carleton student has to chime in to agree that St. Olaf and Lawrence sound like potentially better options than both Rice and Carleton.</p>

<p>If OP’s school is like ours. Kids are given 2 excused college visit days for junior year and another 2 for senior year. Anything over that is unexcused (or the parent has to write a “sick” note). One or two unexcused days probably won’t matter too much - but they may prevent the kid from being exempt from finals, which for my kids was a big deal. We did a lot of visiting in the summer. </p>

<p>My opinion? Cancel the Rice trip and just let her see the campus in the spring. Use the 2 days to go to schools that she is really interested in.</p>

<p>Yes, it is worth for the trip.</p>

<p>I am assumed that you are from Texas maybe north Texas. </p>

<p>DD went to St. Olaf for college visit and music scholarship competition two years ago.</p>

<p>He really likes it but did not go there due to many other reasons.</p>

<p>He visited a lot of schools and end of with sitting in the counselor office for being absent so many days or tardy. He got his punishments and we got an letter saying we will be in court for not being a good parents but he did graduate the end. </p>

<p>The last year someone reported to me that counselor posted DD picture at the front of her office door to inform other students to apply the school DD went since he got a full scholarship.</p>

<p>So bottom line is yes, she will graduate.</p>

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<p>Sounds like time to talk to her about how many trips you are willing to fund and make a plan with her.</p>

<p>OP, from other threads, I recall your daughter is a junior and that within the past couple of weeks, she made a similar college visit trip to Baylor. Seeing Rice now will help her compare/contrast while the info and impressions are fresh. It will also provide a good foundation for her music vs. other degree decision-making process, including a look at a strong pre-med program. A more personal, extended visit with you vs. with the HS orchestra group will be much better in terms of quality. Moreover, there’s nothing like learning firsthand fall of junior year how competitive admission to Rice is–the visit might be a great motivator! </p>

<p>So…I don’t necessarily see this as a bad thing, and I have to agree with others that it’s probably too late now, midday Friday, to cancel this weekend’s trip without causing her to be upset.</p>

<p>With that said, it does sound like she may be overly invested in college search at the moment. You have a senior in the middle of his search and application process, so naturally, it’s a topic of conversation around your home…but he should be the focus, not her! I’d think you could let her know on the drive back from Rice that you won’t be able to do any more visits or significant work on her search until spring, after big brother is done, unless the opportunity to take her on a Minn or Pitt trip arises. Do you have a copy of Fiskes at home? the Colleges that Change Lives book? If not, perhaps you could order a couple of college search books from Amazon used–even better, give her a budget and let her research and select the books she’d like. Also, aren’t you within driving distance of Dallas? If yes, you can search the web to see if there are any more college admission tours/fairs this fall (most occur in Aug and Sept). Otherwise, it’s great that you will have facilitated the Baylor and Rice visits. Those experiences will serve her well as she returns her focus to grades, the upcoming PSAT and all the other (admittedly less exciting tasks!) on the “what I should be doing junior year” list.</p>

<p>If you go, have a safe and productive trip! :)</p>

<p>lmkh,</p>

<p>does your high school host visits from admissions reps of schools that your daughter is interested in? She could learn a lot about some schools this way.</p>

<p>Are your son and daughter interested in any of the same schools so as to make all the visiting a bit more efficient for you? Could she go with her brother to make it easier on you and the baby?</p>

<p>Our high school also had a very limited number of college visit absences…every parent I know wrote excuse notes for a “family trip” or some such, generally in advance, so the student could get any work that would be missed and take it along with.</p>

<p>At some schools, a music major is 130+ hours, while most others are 120. Also, a lot of those music classes are actually more time intensive than the hours for which you are given credit. For example, a chorale class typically gets 1 hr. credit, but may meet 4 hours a week. For this reason, music majors are sometimes one of the few majors that aren’t required to have a minor. And frankly, it would be difficult to carry an unrelated minor for most students.</p>

<p>Our hs has done away with exam exemptions. Therefore, there is very little incentive to be too concerned about an unexcused absence here and there. In our case, unless your child has quite a few - there are really no consequences as long as work is made up.</p>

<p>I can’t understand why it’s worth it for a junior to miss school for a college tour, unless the student is a recruited athlete. At this point in the junior year, I would think the student would be better off spending free time studying for the PSAT.</p>

<p>I don’t believe the Rice Conservatory (Shepherd school of music) is segregated as you describe. My s had friends who were conservatory students but who were in classes with him and lived in the res college with him. True, there may be some classes/resources that may not be available to non-conservatory students, but to ssay they don’t “mix” with the other students is IMO, a misnomer.</p>

<p>I wouldn’t discount the value of visiting campuses Junior year, and even missing a few days of class for it.</p>

<p>Visiting campuses is a good idea for kids of any age, and gets a kid excited about his/her academic future. Plus, depending on the major and the school, applications may need to go in very early in the senior year. It’s a good idea to go into the senior year with a short list already completed.</p>

<p>To each his own, I guess - but we started campus visits in the junior year.</p>

<p>The decision about whether to apply to conservatory absolutely is one that must be made in the junior year in concert with one’s private music instructor. Conservatory applications and auditions are a whole 'nother animal, and if that’s the direction your daughter is headed, you should head over to the Music Major forum.</p>