<p>My parents never wanted me to apply to any schools but SUNY schools. We have an EFC of 40,000, yet my parents say that they cannot even pay half of that. I have worked so hard to be able to go to a school other than a SUNY school. I know SUNY schools are not terrible, but I am looking for more in a university. After all of my hard work, I was invited to two scholarship competitions at Richmond and Delaware. Delaware gave me 17k/yr and Richmond gave me 23,240/yr. Richmond has always been my dream school, but my parents told me that I would need to get big money to go there. Well, I got the big money and my parents were happy for a day, but now they tell me that they want me to go to Delaware because it is cheaper than Richmond. The scholarship at Richmond places me in a program that has many more benefits than Delaware. My parents were willing to pay 15k/yr for SUNY Geneseo, but now they don't want to pay 17k/yr for Richmond. I got into other selective schools, such as William and Mary, and got scholarships there, but my parents wont pay the 20k/yr. I would really appreciate any input that parents may have. It seems like all of my friends' parents are willing to pay and let their sons and daughters take out loans to pay for college. My father wouldn't even visit any schools but the cheap ones with me, and it makes me feel terrible. Am I crazy?</p>
<p>No you are not crazy. It is disappointing but hard to comment on since we don't know your parents circumstances. have you been working? Why couldn't you take out a student loan for the remainder since you'd be the one paying it off after graduation? Were you invited into the Honors Progarm at Delaware? It sounds like you live in NY State so there would be the travel costs several times a year from Delaware, right? Have they factored that in to the cost? Is there any chance they will change their mind about Richmond? I'd be really worried that if my child chose a school because of us as parents ---we'd be "in for it" if it didn't work out or if he was unhappy. Perhaps you can let things settle for a few days then approach your parents and try discussing it further or even putting together a written pitch as to why going to Richmond will be a good investment. Also, attend the accepted students days at both schools and see if that helps tip the scales. Often you get a much better picture of things then than you do when you are a potential student visiting a campus.</p>
<p>My parents do not want me to take out loans for some reason. Yes, I have been working. Thanks for the idea about writing them a note.</p>
<p>First congratulations. It's great you got into your dream school. You got some major financial aid, which means both schools want you. When your parents say that Delaware is cheaper, do they mean cheaper in the absolute sense or after financial aid has been taken into account? Richmond, after all, is giving you substantially more aid. Do the math and see which one will be cheaper after factoring in the aid, and extra costs (such as travel). If the difference is small, is there some way you could take loans in your own name or work to make up that difference? I'm keeping my fingers crossed that the math will come out right for you.</p>
<p>Delaware would cost 6k/yr a year, and Richmond would cost 17k/yr. I will not get any other aid, so Delaware will be the cheaper school to go to by far. My parents don't seem to care that I would have better opportunities and enjoy myself more at Richmond. Thanks for the quick responses.</p>
<p>If you are 18, you can take out a loan. Talk to your parents and tell them you are willing to foot the bill if this is what you want. We can't say that your parents should pay nor can you. But if it's worth it to you to work and take loans to go to the school of your choice, your parents will have to accept that.</p>
<p>Agree with zagat. Go to the bank.</p>
<p>Hmmm I don't turn 18 until July. I have a feeling my parents will force me to send in a deposit to Delaware May 1 before I can take out a loan.</p>
<p>Check with the schools. They have access to student loans.</p>
<p>I don't think you are giving good advice. If he goes to the bank or otherwise defies the parents and borrows money against their advice they may simply refuse to pay the $15k. Keep negotiating. What about a job? Summer job? Would your parents consider the extra $2k as a loan from them to you repayable from summer earnings? The money difference seems small, yet the school difference to you is great. There should be room to negotiate this. Too bad Richmond hiked tuition so much.</p>
<p>(Actually, I see difference between Del and RU is more like $11k, but it's still somthing you can hopefully work out)</p>
<p>try splitting the difference with your parents. They were willing to pay 15k. See if they would go for 10 k and you get student loan for 7k.....Be CALM. Make a list of opportunities you would have at Richmond. Good luck and contratulations.</p>
<p>Also, first go to a parent who is more sympathetic - devide and conquer.</p>
<p>Thank you for the advice.</p>
<p>JamminJb5 - Congratulations on great acceptances! Based on the numbers I've seen the out-of-state RD acceptance rate for William & Mary is in single digits. So again, congratulations.</p>
<p>If ever there was a financial situation that required collaboration, this is it. Your first step is to sit down with your parents and have an adult conversation. Find out why they were willing to spend 15K a year to send you to a SUNY (Binghamton I presume, with your stats) but not URichmond. You may not like what you hear. But at least you'll have a better understanding of their issues. Perhaps 15K is a stretch for them but they fell obligated to pay for state school. Perhaps they don't want you to be that far from home. Perhaps they see that $23,240 differently than you. [My daughter was offered 22K from one expensive LAC, but only 5K was renewable scholarships.] Have the conversation, because parents are allies even under the most difficult conditions. When you know the degree to which your parents can support your college education, you will be in a better position to pursue all the wonderful ideas other posters have provided.</p>
<p>I have tried to have adult conversations with my parents, but they always end up yelling at me. Basically, the only issue is the money. They want me to go wherever it is cheapest. However, my mother is starting to see where I am coming from with Richmond. My father, on the other hand, has always been cautious with money. I will see what I can do. It is all a matter of getting my father to see Richmond and learn more about the school.</p>
<p>JamminJb5 - Well, the cheapest route is you working full time and attending community college on your own earnings. That's solution isn't on the table so the real meaning of "cheapest" is not yet established. It sounds as if your Mom is sympathetic. Would it be possible to have the conversation with her first? Your Dad's opposition is important, but you're kinda on deadline here and you need to make progress on the issue whatever way you can.</p>