<p>Once again, sea and others, sweats =/= dirty or gross. It also =/= automatic schlumpiness. I know people who wear jeans multiple days in a row. Is that wrong? Why is it only sweats that can be gross? </p>
<p>And now that I sound like a broken record, I’ll stop trying to make that point.</p>
<p>Being a schlump also sends it’s own message. It’s trying to send the message of don’t care how I look and thus sending message don’t care how others dress.</p>
<p>Dirty anything is not good. One can study while doing a load of laundry. And nice sweats can look fine. </p>
<p>I’m not saying one has to dress “up” all the time, but I am saying there is something to be said for dressing appropriately, putting in some effort and care, and when one does dress in sweats and whatnot tomgive tours, meet the dean, you are sending s deliberate message. And peopled judge in the real world. Not all, but often the people that have influence on your life, job, grades, dating life, etc…</p>
<p>It’s what it is.</p>
<p>Does it change your perception?</p>
<p>If the college woman wearing sweats has very expensive hair, make up, jewelry, handbag?</p>
<p>If her hair is “big” or a sleek bob?</p>
<p>If she wears discrete gold hoops or huge diamond studs?</p>
<p>If her nails are unmanicured, buffed, painted? color of polish? decorations?</p>
<h2>What logo is on her bag?</h2>
<p>If the sweats have HYP on them? :)</p>
<p>Considering I only own two pairs of jeans that fit me, and laundry is $3.25/load, it actually would be quite difficult to wear brand new jeans every day. That’s why I love my sweats :D</p>
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<p>You are probably right. In the interest of political correctness, American standards have now stooped to the lowest common denominator in order that no one might ever be offended for choosing to be a complete slob.</p>
<p>It s only recently that I’ve become aware of the value of attending to my appearance, although I still don’t spend the time and effort on it that many people do. I believe some people just HAVE to attend more, even if they only want to leave a neutral impression. I think if there is something that makes you stand out, be it your height or weight, or age, or ethnicity, you might be getting more bang for the buck in a positive or negative way. There is no doubt in my mind that I get a different kind of service depending on how I’m dressed, and right or wrong, these are places I want to do business with. </p>
<p>I think how you dress is a reflection of more than just how much you care about what others think of how you dress. I am not sure of everything it reflects, but this discussion reminds me that description of “dress” is listed second, after how alert and oriented you are, in a psychiatrists mental status exam. I realize this goes beyond “sweats on campus; yes or no?”. </p>
<p>For the purposes of THIS discussion, and based solely on my personal experience, I worry it is too late to think about how you have come across by the time you are asking folks for letters of recommendation.</p>
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<p>Perhaps there is another factor at work here. Many people in the US of college-student-parent age who are not working in physical labor jobs are working in jobs needing minimal physical activity (including walking) in air conditioned buildings. Commuting usually involves driving an air conditioned car up to the doorstep of home or workplace. So function can take a back seat to fashion more often for them compared to college students, who may have to walk or run between classes in varying weather conditions, and who have to walk considerable distances outside from dorm, off-campus residence, or commuter parking lot to class.</p>
<p>Perhaps that is why colleges tell visitors to dress comfortably for the tour – the visitors are likely going to be doing much more walking around outside than the parents do in their jobs, or the students do in their (geographically smaller) high schools.</p>
<p>I keep coming back to this thread and thinking what a “first world problem” the entire discussion is about. I’m waiting on a print job that is a photo essay of the church pastor’s trip to Africa, where she spent time primarily in small villages in various countries. It’s amazing-not one person is wearing “cute little flats” or “dark wash jeans”. Soem DO have on jeans, but they’re stained and not even the right size. AND-many of them are wearing outfits that DO NOT MATCH! AND there are no “cute little tops and/or sweaters”. Some are wearing T-shirts with sports logos from 8 or 9 years ago with DRESS PANTS. My eyes! My eyes! LMAO.</p>
<p>I think most adults in this land of over abundance can put a decent outfit together when the time comes but really, REALLY, it shouldn’t matter. For those who get personally offended by seeing someone who isn’t wearing the right outfit according to him/her, well, it’s nice that they have the time to worry about it.</p>
<p>I live and work in a part of town where there are people who struggle for their next meal. Some still manage to look clean and neat, if not fashionable. Others do, in fact, wear sneakers and warm-up pants without matching tops. We help them anyway. </p>
<p>The irony is that one of the schools my youngest has on her list DOES have a dress code-no sweats or PJ’s outside the dorm, no midriff-baring tops for girls, no saggy pants on anyone. That’s cool with me because anyone going there knows in advance that’s the code and it’s got religious backing so there’s that too. But anywhere else? Have at it-wear what you like. You’ll figure out soon enough what the parameters are where you live and work.</p>
<p>seamom, I work part time in a similar setting . ( Not in Africa right now, but I have worked in Nigeria, and found “dress” or at least adornment there to be meaningful as well.). In my current setting, we have clients who are in transition from clients to staff. It is interesting to see that transition reflected In their appearance.</p>
<p>Just to be clear, I am not looking at this discussion as about whether it is “right” to notice or consider ones appearance, with clothing being part of that. I am saying it is hard to deny it’s impact on how even “good” people “see” you.</p>
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Yes, and deciding between U Penn and Penn State (for the insiders who realize they are different schools :)) is also a “first world problem”. Should College Confidential be shut down until the problem of world poverty is solved?</p>
<p>No, Beliavsky , not at all. It’s just that almost 300 posts on the matter is a little much. When people insist, post after post about how offending it is to even LOOK at someone who isn’t coordinated in “proper” clothes, it’s a litle mind-boggling in the grand scheme of things.</p>
<p>*American standards have now stooped to the lowest common denominator in order that no one might ever be offended *</p>
<p>Actually Bay, you’ve pointed out several times that you * are offended* if someone’s clothing does not reach your standard of respect. Although I still really don’t understand what that means, and for college students on campus, I don’t think occasionally wearing sweatpants is going to get them hauled off to the Nordstrom half yearly. ( however if they are worn with Crocs, it might) ;)</p>
<p>But for instance I have no idea what to wear to dinner to my inlaws tomorrow night.
They do not care for me, so I do not visit often, however my oldest and her BF are making a special trip to visit them. ( I just realized why the inlaws won’t come for dinner at our house. My H doesn’t drink alcohol and usually we don’t have any. It’s funny that something is so obvious but I looked past it)</p>
<p>I’m not going shopping but I am giving myself a manicure. Which I should probably put off until right before I leave!</p>
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<p>Somewhere upthread someone mentioned seeing a mother perhaps on a college tour who was wearing tight leopard pants, high heels, something very Sopranos or Jersey Shore. Of course, the implication was that we should all smirk at her lack of taste and inappropriateness and mutton-dressed-as-lamb or whatever the saying is. She could have been a lovely person - who knows. But the point is - yes, what you wear does say something about you. Don’t pretend it’s true for Ms. Jersey-Shore-leopard-pants and then pretend it’s not true for other types of clothing.</p>
<p>I guess that’s my point. Why get all worked up about clothing when there are real issues everywhere? Childhood hunger in this country would be one I’d care about more than fashion.</p>
<p>Who is to say we can’t care about both? When I help a woman at the shelter with a makeover before job interviews, those clothes often do more for her self-esteem than the group sessions. It is that feeling of looking good, that sense of confidence that can make a real difference. I see it in the shelter’s occupants often, the evolution in their clothing choices-sometimes starting in sweats, no makeup, not caring about appearances as the weight of the world is on their shoulders to slowly taking pride in appearance, of choosing to add a scarf or choose the dress over the pair of jeans. The kindness of doing each others’ hair as they talk about the future in concrete ways.</p>
<p>MizzBee–we can care about both and your work sounds wonderful. What bothers me is what seems like disdain for people who aren’t dressed and groomed to some people’s standards.</p>
<p>I think what it comes down to is that anything taken to the extreme is not good. Extreme political/religious ranting, extreme eating or drinking, extreme fashion choices (dirty, shabby sweats or a “Jersey Shore” trashy outfit) are generally a bad choice.</p>
<p>yeah, mompop, I have to agree.</p>
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<p>I have not done that; rather I have tried to convey that people who care only about personal comfort, and do not take others’ feelings into account (aka respect for others), when attiring themselves in sloppy sweats (and other things) regardless of the occasion may be selfish and lazy and offensive to others. Being offended by other peoples’ attire is nothing novel or unusual. Dress codes and fashion commentary have been in existence for as long as I have been alive. </p>
<p>Do a google search on psychology and clothing/dress/attire. There is plenty of research and discussion on the importance of what one chooses to wear, both in terms of consequences from outside observers, and for ones’ own self-perception. (See MizzBee’s post #296, above, for example). Ignore it all at your own peril.</p>