<p>It has just begun. My tenth grader came home from school yesterday telling me that the LACs we began considering, his fellow classmates feel would not allow for success in my son's future because nobody ever heard of them. No specific LACs were mentioned. My son's closest friends know that we are looking at smaller schools and that we might look south since our other son is in school in Va. They have told my son that the key to success is going to schools like Rutgers (our instate public), or another large school with name recognition (perhaps NYU would be an example). </p>
<p>My son does know better because he told me that one could begin at a CC and end up successful. I hope that he can keep that in mind. </p>
<p>How can one help keep this peer pressure and advice to a minimum in terms of influence? One of my son's best friends will definitely attend Rutgers, and it nearly a 100% done deal and he is in 10th grade (unless he is not admitted, but that is unlikely). His fate is sealed with respect to where he will attend. I am sure that other friends will also apply to Rutgers, as well as schools like UDel. Those are 2 big schools that kids apply to from our high school.</p>
<p>My 10th grader is having a mandatory college meeting at school next week. The school works very hard to make sure that the kids who don’t have resources at home are on the path early. Because that meeting’s coming, I had a chat with my daughter. I told her that when she returns in the fall, she’s going to be involved in the college process for most of the rest of high school in some fashion or other and that it’s important for her sanity (and mine) that she keep her business to herself and respects her classmates’ privacy and circumstances. I told her that it’s fine to share general information if it comes up, but that no one knows what anyone’s application will look like or what their financial situation is, so everyone must refrain from opining on others’ choices. I think the best way to deal is to do what she has to do and be sincere in wishing the best for her classmates. She doesn’t realize how competitive her IB program is going to be because she’s not competitive in the same way (she can be very oblivious to other people sometimes, in good and bad ways). D2 had the highest PSAT scores in freshman and sophomore years, which fact was unintentionally made known by the counsellor who gave out the score reports, which caused some resentment among classmates. The vast majority of kids in her school will go to one of the three very local schools, but I believe my daughter is going to look further to find a classics school for herself. She’s not going to have one of the tippy-top GPAs in the class, but she has some very interesting ECs that most of her classmates don’t know about.</p>
<p>Once the conversation about colleges begin, my daughters insist they will be going to a post-high school training facility in a nearby town. </p>
<p>It’s called “The Razzle Dazzle College of Hair Design” and is located in a strip mall.</p>
<p>They’ve stuck with this story for a couple of years now, and generally refuse to engage in speculation about where they or anyone else should go, except at home. This will work fine, until “Razzle Dazzle” turns out to be someone’s dream school…</p>
<p>riverrunner, I love it! </p>
<p>My son and I already had a chat about not discussing specific schools where he might apply in the future. This conversation with friends was just general. The point was to say name recognition is important for future success, and without that name recognition one will not be successful.</p>
<p>I wonder where these ideas come from. Are kids just thinking out loud? Do they hear this information at home? What makes someone think that one must go to a school with mass name recognition for success? </p>
<p>I know that my older son felt awkward telling some folks who asked where he was admitted. If he mentioned the name of a small school, I saw the puzzled look and witnessed the dead silence, rather than a happy congratulations. That really hurts, and it does not make a kid too excited about going. BTW, he did not even apply anywhere obscure on the other side of the US. All schools were within a 6 hour drive of our home, but many schools were smalerl and were not tier one. I would have been proud to have my son attend any of them. I can imagine the looks my younger son will get if he says that he was admitted to LACs in the midwest! Our GC told us that nobody from our hs considers the schools that we are currently interested in.</p>
<p>I’ve started broaching the search with my sophomore thanks to all the mail he’s gotten. We’ve talked in broad terms about what he’d like to study, how far from home he’d like to go, etc. He trusts my opinion and his own. He’s very independent and won’t let others influence his decision – I hope! And he understands that finances will play a larger role for us than it will for a lot of his classmates.</p>
<p>We’ve already caught one of his classmates lying about his seventh-grade SAT score, so he knows to take it all with a grain of salt. Besides my strategy is to be the one to take on all the worry and stress!!</p>
<p>Well zoosermom, and youdon’tsay, I guess we will be going through this process together with our tenth graders. I see the fun is beginning with both of you too.</p>
<p>We can all have fun together and perhaps send each other crayons in the loony bin.</p>
<p>Northeastmom, am I right that you’re in New Jersey?</p>
<p>Yes zoosermom. Oh, I will need those purple crayons in my padded cell as I figure out how to pay for this without a break from kiddo #1! Fun, fun, fun. </p>
<p>Just cross posted with you Youdon’tsay. We all get to color together. Hopefully our pictures will become clearer as we move along.</p>
<p>I’ve got a senior and a soph, (and a 7th grader!!) so add me to the class of 2010 moms as well. My husband was a little stunned when I reminded him that not only would D1 be leaving for college in the fall, but D2 would need to make a couple of visits. “Denial” is his middle name. My CC connection and access to all this info, advice and good listeners has saved my marriage!</p>
<p>Oh, riverrunner, welcome to the 10th grade club too! My H is resigned to my looking at schools early since he has been through this once with me and our older boy. Otherwise, he would wait until winter of senior year, and then just scramble without having done any research.</p>
<p>riverrunner, I have a seventh-grader, too, so we’ll get to know each other and our kids real well in the next five years. Five more years of this …</p>
<p>I have a college frosh and a 10th grader. When her brother was looking at colleges, D announced that she wanted to go to “a college that people have heard of - and not just people who are looking at colleges.” But her mind changes about what she wants from week to week. I think this is normal for a 10th grader. She refused to accompany us on almost any tours last year, so she’s seen exactly 2 schools - Clemson (visited because it’s near my parents and it’s her grandpa’s alma mater) and Lafayette (where bro attends). Huge Southern Univ, and small northeastern LAC, very different but she liked them both and says she’ll go to one of them. When I remind her that they’re the ONLY 2 schools she’s seen…</p>
<p>It seems that her friends with siblings in college talk about where they’d like to go, but her friends who are the oldest in their families are kind of oblivious for now. Honestly, we didn’t start to talk about colleges until halfway thru DS’s junior year. I think we’ll have to start earlier with DD because she plays a varsity sport in the fall, so the visits will need to be done spring/summer of junior year.</p>
<p>Mine wants a name school, but she doesn’t want to work too hard. Oh, she also wants to go to a small school and a large university. Ok? This child is incredibly challenging. We should definitely start up a loop or something for 10th grade moms who color</p>
<p>Northeastmom, do you know anything about Drew? The Demon received an invite to a sophomore open house at Drew and is as interested as she gets in anything or which there is no profit to her.</p>
<p>My S is in 10th grade, and his big sister is a sophomore in college (eight consecutive years of tuition…but at least no overlap!) The two are very, very different kids in just about every way, and the college search for S is going to be a very different process from his sister’s. So I’m looking forward to the great ideas and advice from all of you!</p>
<p>I have a 10th-grader too - can I join this group? I also have a 6th-grader, so I’ll be around for a long, long time.</p>
<p>D the 10th-grader) is starting to think about what type of college she wants to attend. Although she doesn’t have an older sibling, her boyfriend and many of her friends are seniors, so she has been college-aware all year. I am very glad she has witnessed the whole process as many of these kids have amazing stats/ECs, and although they have some nice acceptances among them, they also have many rejections. It was sort of a wake-up call for her, I think.</p>
<p>I honestly don’t know how we’ll handle college visits as D is a three-season athlete - but I guess we’ll figure it out.</p>
<p>By the way, zoosermom, my D got that invite to Drew as well (we won’t be going - no interest at this point).</p>
<p>LIMOM, maybe we’ll end up at some of the same open houses down the road. </p>
<p>My oldest daughter thinks that her sister is going to sabotage herself in the college process because she doesn’t want to go away. I hope that’s not true, but I can’t swear to it.</p>
<p>Which is why I so enjoy profiteroles with hazelnut gelatto and creamy chocolate sauce. I’d be happy to share.</p>
<p>booklady, we have the same 8 years. I know how exactly how it feels. </p>
<p>Limomof2, welcome to the 10th grade group!</p>
<p>For those interested in Drew, I have not seen it. It has a very good reputation in NJ. I know that a poster on CC who also has 10th graders (twins), has an older son at Drew. Perhaps she will come to this thread. You might want to send her a PM if you are highly interested. The poster is debruns. I think that she would love to talk to anyone interested about Drew. Her son is very happy there.</p>
<p>zooser, just cross posted with you. What is wrong with staying close to home?</p>
<p>I’d also like to join the group, having a tenth grader and a college freshman, (also as a younger child finishing up elementary school), and I can work the crayons, as well. ;)</p>
<p>Since my older D started college last August and D2 took the PSATs last fall(our HS just started administering them in 10th grade), it’s like I haven’t left the college search circuit at all. Of course, in the wake of the PSATs, D2’s been receiving a steady stream of mailings from colleges. And because of that, it’s also being discussed amongst her friends. Most of it is from schools that don’t interest her, but there have a been few LAC’s that have caught her interest–Carleton, Bard and Kenyon, for example. It should be interesting because, as some of you have also mentioned, it looks like D2’s colleges are going to be quite different than her those of her older sister, who came to favor the large state universities..D2 seems to favor the LACs. But I’ve got to tell you, after reading the threads of Class of '08 RD decisions–quite sobering–particularly within the last week, I was telling my D that she’s going to have to cast a VERY wide net, choose her safeties (financial and academic) carefully, and make sure to include some rolling admission schools on her final list.</p>
<p>ETA: D also received mail from Drew, but I’m not too familiar with it. I wonder about the English Department there.</p>
<p>“zooser, just cross posted with you. What is wrong with staying close to home?”</p>
<p>Sorry I didn’t make myself clear. She meant not go away as in never leave high school or her bedroom.</p>