It is not always easy to get a kid off the hamster wheel. I have friends who tried to convince their high achieving daughters to take a bit of a breather and choose a lower level class in their areas of less interest. Both girls refused and accused the parent of not believing in them. The parent knew, rightfully so, that this would cause a lot of stress, but really couldn’t force them to pick a different class since the teacher had recommended them for honors/AP. These kids were aiming very high, achieved their goals and are now very successful and less stressed.
You can provide many models of success from less prestigious Unis, but if a kid has his or her heart set on at least trying for the tippy top (and the have a shot), do most parents tell them they can’t try (assuming finances are not an issue)? Some kids can handle the stress better than the parents or even thrive on it.
My oldest was one and done on the tests, but the other two took SATs twice (after PSATS in 10th and 11th offered by our district) and the youngest took ACT which I thought would be better for him, but was not.
It is a tough balance.