<p>I’m still blown away that submitting a recommendation by the postmark deadline is considered “abusing one’s position.” Maybe if pewpewpew’s teacher did/does something truly heinous, then she can be “called on the carpet” now or later, but I just can’t believe the suggestion that a stink be made because the kid reminded her about a deadline one too many times and she got “KIND OF snappy.” If the school really wanted the recommendation weeks before November 1st, then its deadline would reflect that. There is nothing wrong with submitting something barely on time, as long as it’s on time.</p>
<p>She is going to make the deadline, the recommendation will make it to the school, pewpewpew will either get in or he/she won’t, and either way, pewpewpew will write the teacher a gracious thank you note.</p>
<p>WWashy makes a good point- there is no law that says the teacher needs to send it in early, just on time. While it is nerve-wracking for the tudent and his family, it is a learning moment: fulfill your own obligation and know that you can’t control the outside world. Exercise diplomacy while following up on the rec. Learn to toe the line between expressing a gentle reminder and obsessing.</p>
<p>However, I also have witnessed the (few) types of teachers described by Mom2- those who wield their petty power in destructive, self-aggrandizing ways. Her suggestion of documenting and reporting the transgressions after graduation is spot-on.</p>
<p>1) The teacher (who should be a role model) is setting a bad example of “waiting for the last minute” to “just make” a deadline. That attitude is something that teachers HATE when their students do that!</p>
<p>2) If the student had not reminded the teacher this week, and the teacher ended up missing the deadline, her response/defense would be, “YOU DIDN"T REMIND ME, so it’s YOUR fault that I missed the deadline. It’s YOUR responsibilty to remind your teachers about these things” (per common app). The same teacher who would be “snippy” to one student for giving a “reminder,” would be the same teacher who would blame another student for not giving a reminder.</p>
<p>3) The teacher is doing what I call, “Creating your own nag.” All of us are familiar with this scenario. We’ve all have had kids, spouses, co-workers, etc, that selfishly drag their feet to do something and then “get snippy” at the person who reminds them. That is what I call “creating your own nag.” If the person would just do the thing in a timely manner, he/she wouldn’t get nagged.</p>
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<p>I kept a Word doc on my computer where I would document date/time details so that there would be a record for this final report.</p>
<p>There were only 2 teachers that were really bratty. Another one wasn’t “bratty,” but she wouldn’t grade ANYTHING until the very end of the marking period, so a student never knew how he was doing in her class until it was too late. Sometimes, she’d “miss” the deadline for getting grades in. One essay that was due in the 2nd quarter, didn’t get graded until the 4th quarter. Crazy! My boys each had her for 2 years, so we had to put up with 4 years of this laziness. She also had no clue about how to “curve” a test. We did intervene about that earlier, and the bio teacher had to teach her how to properly curve a test.</p>
<p>I think what some ppl hear are losing sight of is the fact that it’s not like this student approached the teacher two or three weeks before the letter was due when they initially asked for the rec to be written, rather the students asked months before and the student did not hear anything. Of course the child should check to see that it was taken care of due to the fact that the teacher in this scenario gave no indication that it was or would be. Then when the teacher is asked by the student the teacher gets snippy. That is rude and as I said earlier the teacher set their self up for the student to ask if they were going to get the letter in on time.</p>