<p>Why would a mom have a kid’s college essay outlined? What if he doesn’t want to write about that? I find that odd.</p>
<p>My kids wrote essays I couldn’t because they were theirs.</p>
<p>My D is starting law school in August, and although I have a PhD and am a very smart person, she is much more knowledgeable about a lot of things than I am.</p>
<p>My S can read Latin and ancient Greek. I can’t.</p>
<p>I could never presume to so speak for either of them in any way.</p>
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<p>Arnold either has a college degree from Wisconsin or was working on one in the late 70’s. (we used to hang out at the same bar) :p</p>
<p>No matter how fair, reasonable, sensible, and justifiable some policy is, if it harms MY kid, I’m going to be annoyed. So as far as I’m concerned, konabean, rant away. Then “shake the dust off your feet,” and just conclude that those adcoms at BC must be a bunch of idiots.</p>
<p>It did not occur to me that the cancer was even something to mention. He was only 5 when dxed and has been one of the very lucky ones who have had little or no fallout as of yet from the treatment. It’s only something we have revealed in the medical history forms and only because the question is directly asked. My son has even just ignored the question at times. He has always felt that it just causes more problems and possible prejudice. When he broke his nose a few months ago, he truly regretted checking the cancer square on the ER medical history sheet. He just wanted his danged nose examined and fixed, and personel were fixated on the leukemia head 15 years ago. He feels that people look at you differently when they know you have had cancer. </p>
<p>In his case, according to the GC, his personal experience was relevant because of his research and activities at Memorial Sloan Kettering that he has done. That he is comfortable among cancer kids and families, and has no problems walking in a cancer hospital since he goes there himself each year for follow up survivor check up is something worth mentioning. If he had no other connection with cancer, it would have been questionable if the issue was raised. </p>
<p>As a mom of a child who had cancer, I feel to my marrow, how parents feel about the ordeal and it never goes away. But it would irritate me to see a deliberate capitalization on such a thing on an essay. It also looks a lot better coming from someone else. The truth of the matter is that my son really does not think back much on his experience at all, but what it has opened some doors to him in terms of research and work. The biostatistics he gathered for his study would not have been easy for most folks to obtain, but as “one of them” he was able to get confidential info because families were more than happy to give him the releases. He was not just a voice on the phone, a kid doing a science project. </p>
<p>As for my kids’ essays, there was no way I could have written them. Even if they were not going to write them, they were not about to let anyone else do it. It was painfully clear to all who read my kids’ essays who wrote them. I swear the guidance counselor shuddered at some of them.</p>
<p>You are right NSM. It is not a hook. Bad use of the word. It is something that catches an instant of attention and if relevant to other recent activities, can have some impact. In his case, it certainly was not adversity that had to be overcome in the last few years which is what adcoms really examine. A childhood illness or situation that has just has that is not a day to day issue in the teens is not really relevant except in the context of other things.</p>
<p>I don’t think it’s just legacy, I think it’s legacy plus money…as long as it is donated frequently and consistently and in large amounts. It may also be activity on a board at the school. (A woman in my town was recently going on about the fact that her brother was on the board of a competitive university and so when it is her daughter’s time to apply she will be a shoo-in. I don’t doubt it.)</p>
<p>Where is you son/daughter going to be attending, and is he/she still on the BC wait list? I heard that they took people into summer last year!</p>
<p>P.S. Glad to hear your nephew is doing okay. A child’s illness takes a huge toll on a family.</p>
<p>“plus money…”</p>
<p>Bingo. If there is a choice between two close to equally qualified candidates, those whose families that have shown a commitment to giving to the school will get the edge.</p>
<p>H and I are not very active with our alma mater. We’ve gone to some events and reunions, H pays for a club membership in a NYC uni club and alumni membership dues. We’ve met up with friends there. However, within the administration, I have two good friends who work right near the admissions office. If it ever were REALLY important to me to get one of my kids into the school (none of mine have even applied there, and the fourth one is not at all interested either), I could start making inroads to stack the deck in our favor without donating money. </p>
<p>First of all, I could get a lunch at the Alumni Club with the admissions rep. I could drop in on him and keep in touch. Have my kids do the same. It gets tough to reject someone when they are so in your face, especially if the stats are in line. Also could ask friends to bring up the subject subtly. Adcoms are human and appealing to human nature works most of the time. That is why alot of staff children will get accepted to their school where their parents work. Kinda sticky when you’ve rejected someone’s kid and you gotta see him at work all the time and maybe even work for or with him. ESpecially if the kid is definitely in the admit stack in terms of stats. Without the stats that put the kid in the admissable zone, that is not even going to help most of the time.</p>
<p>One of my former classmates was at a reunion with his daughter. One of the admissions officers came by and joined us. “Why, she’s been coming here since she was a baby,” the woman exclaimed, when the dad said that his D was going to be applying there in a few months when the new season opened. She certainly was going to be admitted unless there was some bomb in her file. And she was with not the best stats, even. </p>
<p>So, yes, being a big time donor will make a difference, and will make a difference whether you are an alum or not. But for alums, the personal relationship could really be the tipping point. Now most schools do have different guidelines on how to treat legacy applicants, and yes, they are favorable. They do give those kids an edge. Pair that with some personal contact, and yes, of course they will have a benefit. </p>
<p>Also, just as a pointer, applying early at some of these schools makes a big difference. BC accepts more kids EA than RD, and more than a third of their seats are made up of the early birds which doesn’t leave a lot more left for the regular rush. And those early kids do tend to accept the offer cuz many kids like that bird in the hand especially when the ones in the bush still need apps processed and essays. Don’t think the admissions offices don’t know that either. My kids did very well with their EA picks. All of them did EA with a bunch of schools and that was part of their safety strategy. A legacy kid who applies, EA, is deferred, then waitlisted, then has someone inquire about him with connections and the family lets the school know that he will definitely come if accepted, has a sibling in the school already…what adcom is not going to accept him? Of course the kid was accepted. And courtesy waitlists for legacies is very common even at schools that don’t give legacy much of a boost.</p>
<p>“Why would a mom have a kid’s college essay outlined? What if he doesn’t want to write about that? I find that odd.”</p>
<p>You find it odd? Everyone I know made suggestions to their kids about topics for their college essays, and most took them up on those suggestions. My son didn’t have a clue about what to write his essay about and he wrote two, both were suggestions of topics given to him by my husband and me. The first one was awful and he finally trashed it then started all over again, but no one wrote it for him, just suggested topics.</p>
<p>My SIL hasn’t been away from my nephew for even one night because of his condition, she’s the ultimate helicopter mom but for a valid reason. He already has his sights set on a very selective college and he, his mom and dad know that making his essay about his very rare life threatening condition will be a compelling one.</p>
<p>Why would he write about anything else? Can you think of a better topic than one which has affected his life so deeply? Everything he does was affected, sports he couldn’t play, places he can’t go, his height, his many specialist appointments, open heart surgeries, everything.</p>
<p>Yes, that’s what his essay will be about. Some people might even write a book about it.</p>
<p>Hunt, loved your post, thanks!</p>
<p>I only wish I had found CC sooner, then S might have gotten into BC. He surely would have applied to more reach schools and written a better essay.</p>
<p>In our town, kids are having their essays authored by professionals. And I know of several families who had an older sibling (who was more talented in that area) write the essay. It’s ridiculous, but nothing new. When my younger sibling was applying to college, my own mother asked me to write her essay. I refused, which caused a lot of strife in our family ("Don’t you want to help your sister?) My mother ended up writing the essay, and my sister was admitted. Of course I don’t know if it had anything to do with the essay, but I definitely have a big chip on my shoulder about kids getting boosts they don’t deserve, and yes…it stems from my childhood!! So the venting if fine with me!!</p>
<p>“They” say they can tell the difference between an applicant written essay and an adult/professionally edited essay. I don’t know if I buy this line. I wish there was a way to equalize this process.</p>
<p>“They” are really starting to annoy me! :p</p>
<p>“Why would he write about anything else? Can you think of a better topic than one which has affected his life so deeply? Everything he does was affected, sports he couldn’t play, places he can’t go, his height, his many specialist appointments, open heart surgeries, everything.”</p>
<p>If the essay is only about how he has survived a life threatening condition, I don’t think it will be as compelling a way to open top college’s doors as would be an essay that was about how a person survived a life threatening condition and has done things to help others who are affected by similar or other problems.</p>
<p>For instance, my college roommate – who when she was a baby wasn’t expected to survive her heart problem-- became a neonatologist, and I’m guessing that was what she may have focused her essay on, not her own various surgeries.</p>
<p>“You find it odd? Everyone I know made suggestions to their kids about topics for their college essays, and most took them up on those suggestions.”</p>
<p>I made suggestions to both of my kids. Older S followed one of my suggestions, and let me offer editing suggestions, though he didn’t accept all of them.</p>
<p>Younger S listened politely to my suggestions, but I have no clue what he ended up writing about since he never showed me his essay.</p>
<p>I listened with irritations to my mother’s suggestions for my essay, and then wrote what I wanted to, never showing her anything. I got into every place that I applied. While the odds of acceptance were far better than they are now, when I applied was what was up to that time the most competitive year for college admissions.</p>
<p>There’s a big leap between making a suggestion for a topic and actually outlining an essay. I’m gonna assume that when you said your SIL had “outlined an essay” for her son, you really meant she had suggested it as a topic. At least I hope so. Otherwise, is she gonna do his work for him when he gets into that “really selective college” too?</p>
<p>"There’s a big leap between making a suggestion for a topic and actually outlining an essay. I’m gonna assume that when you said your SIL had “outlined an essay” for her son, you really meant she had suggested it as a topic. At least I hope so. Otherwise, is she gonna do his work for him when he gets into that “really selective college” too? "</p>
<p>Of course she hasn’t outlined his essay - he’s 15 and a HS freshman.</p>
<p>You assumed correctly, she has a lot of friends whose kids are applying to colleges and it’s a given that his essay topic will about truncas arteriosus. When I see him next week I’ll suggest that he express an interest in pediatric cardiology, thanks for the suggestion Northstar. ;)</p>
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How would they know that they can tell? I’ve always been skeptical about this claim.</p>
<p>"Where is you son/daughter going to be attending, and is he/she still on the BC wait list? I heard that they took people into summer last year!</p>
<p>P.S. Glad to hear your nephew is doing okay. A child’s illness takes a huge toll on a family."</p>
<p>Thanks ready-to-roll, my nephew is doing great, just waiting to hear when the next surgery is, they’re pretty brutal but he’s feisty.</p>
<p>I answered your PM, my son never made BC’s WL, they flat-out rejected him.</p>
<p>I have friends who hired writers to “help” their kids with their essays too.</p>
<p>As far as I know, none of them were “caught”.</p>
<p>I don’t like the idea of essays but I’m not sure what the alternative would be?</p>
<p>If I had my way, I would have the essays administered through the ACT/SAT tests. Change the question for every test setting and you would get a true sense of each applicant. I suppose it would be boring for the Adcoms to read 25,000 versions of the same question, but it sure would even up the playing field.</p>
<p>Kajon, I REALLY like that idea.</p>
<p>Back when I took the LSAT (mid-80’s), that’s exactly what they did.
There was an essay question on each test, but they didn’t grade it, they just sent a copy to each law school to which you applied. </p>
<p>It showed a sample of your writing, under test conditions and without help from anybody else. Much more valuable than an application essay written by who-knows.</p>