<p>Hi! I am applying as a transfer to UCD, UCI, UCSD, UCLA, UCB, UCSC, and UCR. Please provide me with CONSTRUCTIVE criticism (don't be mean please >.<) on my essays! :) Also, I am a neurobiology/physiology major transferring from a CC with a 3.14 GPA.. could anyone also chance me for the UC's I'm applying to? Thank you for taking the time to do this, I appreciate it!</p>
<p>Prompt 1: What is your intended major? Discuss how your interest in the subject developed and describe any experience you have had in the field — such as volunteer work, internships and employment, participation in student organizations and activities — and what you have gained from your involvement?</p>
<p>"It was not until the junior year of high school that I had found a subject I genuinely found interesting and performed well in. The psychology course I took that year truly opened up a new aspect in my life, mostly because I had never considered the mind to be so complex and measureable—I had naively thought there wasn’t much to learn about the mind. The class had allowed me to not only gain knowledge on how the mind works, but also tips that applied to real life scenarios, such as learning, memory, and stress management. I remember I often found myself ecstatic every time I entered my psychology classroom because I knew I would be learning more knowledge and skills that I would be able to apply to my life. Having a passion for a subject was new to me, and I think perhaps the reason why I loved this course so much was because I was suffering from depression myself at that time. One of the most important lessons I have learned in my life so far comes from that class and it is the lesson that my depression was not my fault—this allowed me to develop into the stronger person I am today.
I had experienced a similar passion during my second year of college when I was taking my first biology course. I always knew I was proficient at biology in high school but I never knew that I actually enjoyed it until college. I will never forget that the most interesting part of the course was towards the end of the semester, where we touched the surface of human physiology. I was especially interested in this part because of the many health issues my dad has—I was enticed to learn how, why, and what happens in the body that causes some of the same problems my dad was facing. Learning about the biology behind the different systems in the body helped me refine my interests down to what I want to focus my academic career on, neurobiology and physiology. Psychology is my passion and physiology is my interest. There is nothing I would love to do more than to combine these two subjects to learn and master how the brain and body function as a whole.
Once I discovered my passions, I knew what impact I wanted to leave on the world. I want to pursue psychiatry in the medical field so that I will be able to turn my academic passion into a passion for helping others. Because I realized this so late into my college career, I am still in the process of obtaining experience in my field. I had recently gotten accepted into an academic program that focuses on building leadership and leaving an impact on our community. This opportunity is allowing me to start a project that targets the mental health of students in my college community. By creating seminars for mental health wellness, my hopes are to increase awareness and provide the help that students need to cope with their own problems—something that I had never received when I was suffering from my own mental health pitfall. I am also currently organizing my resources together to initiate a biology club at my campus in the spring semester, with the belief that students who share my same affinity for biology will have a place and community to express it."</p>
<p>Prompt 2: Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud, and how does it relate to the person you are?</p>
<p>"When I was thirteen, my dad had a heart attack and underwent open-heart surgery. While he was bed-ridden for almost a year, my mom had to work overtime to handle the finances by herself. Being the oldest in my family, I had to take the responsibility of looking after my dad, my little sister, and the house during this time. At this age, when I had barely entered my teenage years, I had to become an adult; I grew up too fast. This experience attributed to one very crucial quality that I have developed—perseverance.<br>
In high school, my parents separated and I was living with my mom and sister. During this time, my mom was still working to provide for us, so naturally, I picked up the responsibility again at home. Although I managed to get through this, I fell into depression for three years towards the end of high school and beginning of college. It was hard for me to wake up every day, knowing that my parents were divorcing and having financial issues and that I had to get involved in all of this because in our culture, the oldest child must take responsibility for the family. However, these dark years of my childhood have turned me into the enduring adult I am today. I didn’t realize it until much later, but I had persevered through the most challenging experience I have faced so far. Even when I was at my lowest, I kept pushing myself to get through the day by believing in a better tomorrow. This experience made me realize that I do not quit, I persevere.
Today, my life has turned around for the better. I turned my negative past into a positive present and hopefully future as well. We get out of life what we put in. I started putting positivity into my life, and that is exactly what I am getting out of life. There will always be some obstacle that comes our way on a daily basis. But because of my past, I now look at those obstacles as challenges to overcome; I try to resolve rather than run away from my problems. And I think this is a valuable quality to have, especially to survive in this world. My experiences have made me realize how fortunate I am for learning such a valuable quality so early in life and I can honestly say that I’m thankful for my past because it has shaped me into the resilient, responsible, and persevering individual that I am today."</p>
<p>THANKS AGAIN! HAPPY THANKSGIVING :)</p>