Middle to Upper Middle Class - How Do You Afford College?

<p>yeah! i’m NMF and have been offered considerable merit money at specific schools, but i was hoping i could get ~$2,000 or so in non-college-specific local/state scholarships, which so far (and much to my disappointment) isn’t happening at ALL. this wisconsin all state thing has gotten me down too, because it selects the top 15 students in each congressional district by scores/GPA/subjective factors, and i feel that while i am certainly not the VERY top student in my congressional district i am easily up there. i felt a little better when i realized that neither of last year’s presidential scholars from wisconsin were on the all state scholars list, but that’s probably due to them not applying.</p>

<p>The combination of tuition skyrocketing and the tendency for people to live beyond their means (or just barely within them) has created a huge problem in paying for college. Like others who have posted, we have saved toward college, we look for scholarships, live very far within our means, limit student loans to perkins and subsidized stafford, and appeal financial aid award each year. Son is NYU soph, daughter accepted to Northwestern U next year. For two years, our approach has worked, but there is no way we can double down for these next two years. We are thinking of doing PLUS loans for these two years, which simply means we are lengthening the time we take to pay for their education. There are no easy answers!!!</p>

<p>Finding merit money isn’t that difficult, it’s winning it that’s hard, and winning it at the places “you want” is even harder.</p>

<p>It comes down to a point where high-achieving high school seniors need to become realistic an understand the function of money. Top schools don’t need to offer merit scholarships because they know that rich parents will pay for their kids to go there, and middle-class parents will scrape together the money they need to send their kids there. Mid-level colleges offer big scholarships to attract top students away from the top schools and to <em>their</em> schools in an effort to improve the attractiveness of their schools to the students who are NOT going to get merit money, but will pay to go there.</p>

<p>So yeah, it’s going to be hard for all but the tippy-top students to get merit money to top colleges/universities that do offer merit aid. If you’re the average applicant or aren’t in the top 10-15% of applicants at the place it’s unlikely that you’ll get top money there.</p>

<p>Non-college specific scholarships are even less common becuase they’re generally funded by private groups and foundations. If they’re state-wide scholarships, they’re extremely competitive because you’re competing with all the other college-bound seniors in your state.</p>

<p>I wonder if you have to have connections for that since it is by congressional district. My daughter was a finalist for a very prestigious scholarship. I am sure those without connections win the scholarship but certainly many well connected people get it.</p>

<p>Thanks for your post Julliet, but the reason we’re not looking in state is because our state schools don’t offer engineering (unless you want to go 3/2 - which I don’t think makes a lot of sense since you end up paying for 5 years). We have state-related universities that offer engineering - but they’re not dirt cheap. It would cost 22K and theses flagship schools are HUGE - which my son doesn’t want. Also - they don’t offer merit aid. In the end- delaware, which offered my son a generous merit scholarship comes out to be the same price as the in-state school - and it’s 3 hours closer to home! Still - it’s a big school so I don’t know if my son wants to go there. He was admitted to their honors program - so we’ll check it out.</p>

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<p>yeah, i understand that. thing is, i AM a very competitive, particularly for an area that does not produce that many outstanding students. i have won national recognition for my writing, have a 34 ACT, am currently sal of my class, and got accepted to yale EA. two kids from my school won this award last year, and both had comparable scores, good but not notably better EC’s, and no national awards except national merit. i’m not saying i am entitled to win (which i’m not) but it’s discouraging, particularly when the rest of my RD decisions are coming out next week.</p>

<p>i don’t think you had to have connections, but i don’t know. i’m sure they wouldn’t hurt. i got the feeling maybe athletes had an edge in this case (kids who won from my school in the past were athletes). i also wonder if my desire to go into the arts, an unstable career, hurts me in the eyes of traditional scholarship committees.</p>

<p>I am divorced and remarried, so I understand your plight. I hated telling my D that expensive schools were out due to the divorce, something that is not her fault but still penalizes her. But reality is reality, and we moved on.</p>

<p>My D’s school is made up of mostly middle class students. Most kids apply to the instate schools and nowhere else, and unfortunately here in Illinois, they are more expensive than average. I am not sure how the parents afford it; they do the best they can, and some have told the kids that they will not help. One of D’s friends will have around $100k in debt to pay back on a future teacher’s salary. The top kids at her school applied to Ivy league or otherwise prestigious schools. I think sometimes people apply because at that point prestige is more important than cost. They want to see their picture on the school website that they got into a prestigious school. The few kids that have gotten into to top schools have been very upset with the financial aid packages and are now considering other options. We got very lucky in our house; we had been receiving financial aid offers that were very disappointing, and then D received a full tuition scholarship to an out of state public that she will be happy with attending. Fortunately I saved enough to cover her brother’s education, who I know won’t qualify for academic scholarships.</p>

<p>I also am under the frustration many have spoken. Ever since my two Ds were little I have told them that they needed to have straight As to pay for college. We placed importance in retirement instead of tuition plans. They have a small portion saved, but nothing in terms what they need. Of course, I am still in a state if shock at this point with my high EFC and the cost to attend $50K schools. D1 has been offered scholarships but still as well need to come up with $20-24K in top three school choices. Our EFC probably comes from a retirement that we cannot and will not use; and our salary, we do not have much disposable income with housing value dropping, as we are trying to payoff our mortgage within next ten years by making extra principal payments (now 42). I believe in paying off debt and saving for retirement, but now I am in a predicament. I want the best for my D and will probably have to do loans. My H and I had a long discussion to try to make a decision what is right for our family. In our case, we decided it would be in D best interest to have a LAC education and are willing to keep on working to help achieve her goals as well as D2 in four more years. In retrospect should I have looked at early years differently? Probably. My D is #1 in class, future valedictorian and will pay more money to go to college than your average student going to state college. Of course, her job potential is much higher, but at this state in the game, frustration sits in.</p>

<p>OP, I feel your pain. My kids attend a big, suburban public in an area with good schools, well-educated parents and good salaries. Many kids applied to dream schools and ended up at the state school-- $ being the deciding factor. </p>

<p>I can’t say how we’ll fund college because I’m not through yet. I will say that I think low EFC was a factor in my kids’ admissions decisions. </p>

<p>I have seen mothers go back to work when their kids hit college. I have seen kids alternate work with college. I have at least one kid who moved back home to attend a top college with no dorm fees. Some people have grandparents who help. Some have saved the $. </p>

<p>I don’t know the full history of your ex and your husband, but I would see if there’s a way for them to help in some way. Does your ex perhaps live in a state with a college within commuting distance? Perhaps your daughter could live with him. Even if he doesn’t pony up $ for college, it would save you $. Or perhaps he lives in a state with good state schools and your daughter can establish residency by moving in with him. And if my current husband makes good money, I might ask him to pick up some other household expense that would free up some more of my income so I could dedicate it to my daughter’s tuition. I would even see if there’s some stuff we could sell (an old vehicle? unused sports equipment? timeshare?) to help daughter. Maybe your ex-husband has some old stuff he’ll let you sell. (Yes, I would throw a HUGE garage sale with stuff from all parents and step-parents. I wouldn’t be surprised if, between all of you, you have an unused car/ furniture or recreational vehicle that would clear a good chunk of $ for her.) Maybe her dad would drive her and her stuff to college (thereby footing the transportation bill) or let her store her stuff at his house during breaks. I don’t know the men in your life, but I would encourage you to put your negotiating hat on. They may be willing to help especially if you’re not asking either of them to cut a check to the schools.</p>

<p>OP, I’m sorry for your plight. We can not afford expensive schools either. We do not qualify for FA. We told our kids long ago that we had an instate public budget. </p>

<p>Thankfully, We do have good state school choices. The vast majority in our sch./district (including top students) go to our state u’s. The “smart” kids here don’t feel they are being cheated to attend state u’s.<br>
S1 took an ROTC scholarship and combined with merit money offered by our big state u. ended up with a fullride. S2 is full pay (no scholarships) at a diff. instate public. We are able to pay his way using money saved over the last twenty years. Thankfully, our instate rates are reasonable in comparison to many.</p>

<p>Not all state schools cost the same amount of money. For this year, we do qualify for financial aid. We just received our FA packages. Our state school costs some amount over 21,000 (not even sure what the EXACT amount is because it is not stated in this school’s website or on their package. Hard to believe, but they list price by credit hours and I found it mind boggling to figure out the exact COA). We did not get a dime in grant money. </p>

<p>We have offers from 5 private school offers that will cost less than our instate school!</p>

<p>TresElefantes…</p>

<p>Aren’t you going to Yale? What was their FA package?</p>

<p>mom2, i am most likely going to yale, but i am awaiting the last of my college decisions on thursday.</p>

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<p>Yale has VERY generous need based financial aid. They meet full demonstrated need. I do realize that there can be varied offers from schools that meet full need…and I know that others have not gotten as generous packages from Yale as from other “meets full need schools”…but if Yale doesn’t have the money…who will???</p>

<p>yes, that is true. it’s not so much their policy (which is great) as my parents not meeting EFC. :S anyway, i’m waiting for the possibility of a more generous FA offer from yale’s peer institutions before i send in my deposit. i’m doubting we’ll get much more though, and i’m not complaining.</p>

<p>You’ve got a good attitude Tres Elefantes. Even though Yale has one of the most generous financial aid policies of any institution I can imagine that there would still be many situations where it would be difficult for a family to meet their EFC.</p>

<p>Doesn’t Yale do about 10% or your parents earnings up to a certain point? A friend of my daughters said it was cheaper than her parents EFC because it was 15,000 and they had a little bit higher with other schools. She said it was the cheapest except for a state school that offered free tuition, she just had to pay 12,000 R&B there. (UConn)</p>

<p>One of D’s friends will have around $100k in debt to pay back on a future teacher’s salary.</p>

<p>How sad! And so not necessary! How is a teacher supposed to make payments of over $1100 for ten years? This reminds me of that earlier thread that asked if you would discourage your child from marrying someone with big student loans. The consensus seemed to be that if the person was going into a high-paying job then it would be more acceptable. Could you imagine marrying a young teacher with $100k in student loan debt?</p>

<p>Our family doesn’t qualify for need based aid. D1 went to Baylor with full tuition paid and graduates in May and we paid about $11k/year for D1.</p>

<p>D2 goes to UCLA (no scholarship) and we pay about $26k/year for D2. </p>

<p>High senior D3 is deciding in next two months and may choose to attend UCLA (no scholarship) like her sister. IF she does choose UCLA, we will be paying about $55k for both to attend. Sometimes in-state flagships can be pricey too . . and you can’t count them as necessarily a financial safetie school.</p>

<p>Both my hubby and I work, and we have been saving for college since kids were babies – but then stocks took a dive, and this recession isn’t good for my business. We don’t qualify for need based aid – and putting two through UCLA at the same time would really dip into our savings. </p>

<p>Hoping D3 will choose from other colleges that has given her scholarships so it will cost less – but we did tell all our kids they can go to UCs (our instate flagships) if they got in. </p>

<p>Worried about money holding out as we still have sophomore son to put through college too. Would rather not take out any loans but may have to by the time S is ready to attend. Sigh – affording college is one of the disadvantages of having our kids spaced just 2 years apart. Will be able to breathe again in about 4 years when S will be the only one still be in college.</p>

<p>We have 3 kids, 2 years apart. We’re paying with a combo of loans (kids & parents), savings, and current income. That’s for the first 2. Don’t know how we’ll handle #3. The bad economy has been rough on our finances.</p>