Just curious how others are handling / dealing with this. Is your school being flexible / understanding? Are you somehow managing all the auditions without absences?
Basically, are you being honest? Are they giving you a hard time?
D’s school allows 5 days for excused prearranged absences. Not nearly enough to get us through the season. They are also not very accommodating with leaving for a 1/2 day or missing the last couple of classes. I will either need to start writing notes for “doctor appointments” or calling her in “sick” soon. I’ve never liked that, but the policies are usually pretty strict in our district. Taking additional prearranged days as “unexcused” would mean she doesn’t get an opportunity to do the homework and get credit for it. I’m debating calling the Dean and trying to see how receptive he is. I’d really like to be honest, but she can’t afford a bunch of zero’s. She has also already missed school for being sick more times than any other year. So, I’m not sure how the “sick days” will go over either.
Anyone else dealing with this problem?
My Ds school was also strict. If you missed so many days in a semester your grade would go down automatically. We talked with the guidance counselor who knew about other music students each year who had similar issues. She contacted all teachers to assure the absences wouldnt work against her. I was worried but in the end everyone was pretty accommodating. She was at a large public school with good arts programs. Not sure how it works at other schools. I still remember my D missed 5 out of the first 10 days in the semester and more followed. It was stressful but worked in the end.
Does you school consider college visits a legal absence? That is what I am writing on the notes.
Our school was very supportive - prearranged absences for college visits were rarely, if ever, denied. No hard limit that I knew of. Guidance signed off on all D’s audition trips, but I think for five weekend trips she only missed a total of about three days. With the absence approved by guidance, teachers had to allow make-up work.
Have you confirmed with the school that college visits, interviews, auditions, etc. are counted toward the planned absence allowance?
I believe my son’s school/district has a limit on pre-planned absences as well but I think it can be over-ridden with approval from the Dean. Also, based on what I’m seeing on PowerSchool (the online portal for grades, attendance, etc.) I think college-related absences are treated separately. I noticed that they’re noted as “college visits” instead of the planned excused absences I’ve seen when he’s missed school for family events and such.
In any case, my son’s teachers are incredibly supportive. Some of his teachers excuse him from assignments all together, not requiring any make-up work.
I think if it were me and the school was enforcing such a policy and putting us in a position of having to lie or hurt grades, I would put up a stink and fight it (yes, troublemaker here.) I would make the school administrators (or the school board, if this is a district policy) have to formally tell me that they think it’s right to penalize students for choosing to apply to college.
Well, they list the following as acceptable reasons for a prearranged absence:
College visits
Career education visits
Participation in regional or national contests or awards not endorsed by IHSA
Family vacation - accompanied by parent
Special religious events (contact Dean)
Other circumstances as determined by the administration.
She will have used her 5 days by the end of this month and will still have 3 auditions to go. We figure she will need 4 days for those 3 auditions.
She is going straight to the attendance office tomorrow morning and asking (very nicely) what she is supposed to do about the rest of her college applications that are pending auditions for acceptance. We will see how it goes. I’m hoping I’ll be pleasantly surprised!
As for teachers, a couple are being “nice” and understand, but she has not been relieved of any assignments / workload - that’s for sure! Because of her absences this year, her planner is constantly filled with 6 am mornings for making up labs and tests and whatever. She is currently worried about a group presentation that she may miss and her group being upset with her. She missed a field trip (apparently worth points equivalent to a test) and has to do a big project as an alternative assignment. She even gets docked her daily participation points for PE. She has to write essays to get those points back.
Now, ask me how much practicing she’s been getting done or how much sleep she gets. And don’t even get me started on the stress of missing work on all these Saturdays.
Hang in there, @dbandmom - I hope the school will accommodate her audition requests. In our experience this year, with a school with similarly strict attendance policies, d has to get every teacher whose class she is missing to sign a form EACH TIME she will be out (so.much.fun), and, while they do allow her to miss the classes, she still has to make up all the work. At her school, seniors don’t have 2nd term PE requirements, so that helps. Still, we anticipate a bit of a crazy spring.
From what I can tell, most schools don’t have a lot of experience with the college application process for musicians, and, when they are apprised of the situation, do make some accommodations… this is what we’ve been hearing from fellow musicians. It would be counterproductive to want good college acceptance stats (as a school) but not accommodate special situations. I realize some school districts are “that” rigid, but still… as I said, hang in there!
Wow. That’s a terrible thing to have to push against for your girl @dbandmom. I hope she can get it sorted out.
I’m beyond grateful that my D attends a large, public pre conservatory HS for the performing arts, with a strong dual mission. College visits, auditions etc are all excepted, no matter how many. Although of course all course work must be made up in a timely fashion.
Do she have weekday auditions? So far we are only away on weekends and missing a Friday here and there or 1/2 day. The one regional she is doing is a weekday but close to her school so she can go in for most classes.
Our main problem is she goes to a pre college on Saturdays from 9am-7pm and she will be missing quite a few full days during the season. Luckily her voice teacher there understands the process and teaches undergrad as well.
She is rehearsing Orpehus and The Underworld at school which will be really tricky when they begin weekend rehearsals in February. It’s madness, isn’t it?
Who needs to sleep and stay healthy?
My son also went to a large public school that had a very strict attendance policy. But I don’t recall our son’s absences being a problem. He missed more than just the auditions because he also went to a number of festivals and music related competitions that spring. Even if the academic teachers did penalize your son it would not exactly matter as second semester senior year grades are not that important. The only thing I remember being a big issue was GYM. Our state is very strict about student’s completing their gym requirements and our son had left fulfilling his gym requirements to his senior year so he could take more music. This just meant that our son had to go to extra gym classes in the final weeks of school but by that point he had been admitted to college and so it wasn’t that big a deal.
She was told anything over the 5 days would be unexcused. I plan on contacting the Dean, though I’m pretty sure it will get me nowhere. I can’t deal with it this week though. I guess it’s true that this will all be a 2nd semester issue and maybe we just shouldn’t worry about it.
Some of the auditions are weekdays. Most are Fridays, Saturdays, or Sundays. Most are out of state. She is most likely auditioning at 8 schools and missing 9 days of school. In all honesty, we could probably do a little better, but many schools she hasn’t previously visited, so we are trying to get in tours, sample lessons, and sit in on classes where possible.
I met with the Dean on the absence question and he suggested that I put what we discussed in a letter, the dates,the schools, the times she would miss, requests for homework in advance. The Dean and all of her teachers were CC’d in hard copy form. It worked out great. No surprises and everyone was excited about it.
They were not excused at my D’s private prep school, so I was forced to claim the extra missed days as “sick days”. The only thing she “skipped” in senior year was the musical, which was fine because was in February and it wasn’t a show she wanted to do anyway.
It’s a shame when schools don’t understand that the college process isn’t “one size fits all”. Her school was set up for academic college visits: they place a lot of girls in the Ivies, Georgetown, Notre Dame, Washington Univ, Stanford, etc. so that the girls often don’t even bother to visit the schools until they are accepted because they have friends or siblings who are already in residence. There were two girls in D’s high school class that fought this battle and it wasn’t that the school didn’t want to help- the Guidance Dept was on their side as were the teachers and the office staff- but the attendance policy, as written, didn’t know how to address the need for additional days off. One would hope that a small, private school would have been in a better position to deal with this; they knew exactly what these two girls were doing and ignored it because both of them did all of their work and graduated in the top 5 in the class, but it was uncomfortable.
I’ve got to wonder if it would have been the same had my daughter been asking for days off to compete in a science or math event?
We were in exactly the same position last year. My S kept teachers informed and was also required to bring conservatory brochures etc in to the office as proof. But we also resorted to “sick” days and ultimately he lost a credit. He’s my 3rd and last one through the public school system (which was a good experience overall) and my mom was ill so I chose not to fight it. He’s so happy now at his first choice school.
When my daughter was in 9th grade, traveling and performing (sometimes with a national radio program) and getting A’s in her subjects, the public academic magent school she was enrolled in sent me a truancy citation. The bureaucracy in our large city was too large to fight (well, I pick my battles). She finished high school in a cyber charter school. (I realized it’s too late for those who are seniors already–just venting). Another daughter got into hot water at her arts magnet school because she missed 2 days of school when her non-school quartet performed on PBS in Carnegie Hall. (“Not a school-sponsored” activity.) As if quartets from that school were nearly the caliber of the precollege chamber program…
The cyber school cheered my daughter enthusiastically, by the way, and was very proud of her accomplishments and those of the other young musicians, dancers, actors, and athletes enrolled.
In the end, I’d say it doesn’t matter if absences are not excused. The conservatory is not going to care about unexcused absences for auditions. The only case in which it would matter would be students who are also applying to competitive academic schools.
"Another daughter got into hot water at her arts magnet school because she missed 2 days of school when her non-school quartet performed on PBS in Carnegie Hall. (“Not a school-sponsored” activity.) "
FER CRYIN OUT LOUD
This is so true:
“In the end, I’d say it doesn’t matter if absences are not excused.”
I agree with @glassharmonica & @musicamusica .
what is more important? auditioning for undergrad or attendance senior year?
I would not give it a second thought. just do what she needs to do. focus on the future.
I know my D is only concerned with missing Saturday rehearsals for the school opera ( only fully staged, fully orchestrated HS opera in our city.) and her pre college classes.
A bit of time travel would really be ideal for these senior performance students!
Feeling fortunate. My daughter attends a regular public high school and they have a policy: 1-5 days absence and the principal must approve. 6-10 days out and the superintendent must approve. They are very supportive of her audition process, providing she completes missed assignments.
Wow, I’m really amazed by these situations. My D was in a the largest public school in the state and it was known for its “heartless” bureaucracy (as many parents complained about many things). But my experience was always positive bc there was always someone (mainly guidance) that could override certain situations. We too received truancy citations (some due to school music events!) in the mail yearly. When I called, I was told the district’s “system” automatically spits out citations to anyone with over 5 absences but then guidance or a dean overrides them in the individual school system.
My D’s guidance counselor could do very little for her in school choices but she sure worked the bureaucracy for us during auditions. I would definitely complain. Not that it will do any good for you. But still…it’s WRONG when other schools can find a way. And I would politely point that out in writing to the top administrators. At least you will have said your piece (which as you may have noticed is important to me…haha…maybe not you…).
I am horrified by these stories. They also make me grateful that my son’s school was always so understanding and supportive of his out-of-school musical pursuits and his senior year audition season. (So long as he got all his school work done too, of course.) Having been through college applications and music school applications, the latter are way more stressful. The last thing a school should be doing is throwing up roadblocks and adding to the stress. @dbandmom, I’m sorry you and your D are having to go through this and I admire your patience in trying to work it out with the school. But if you can’t work it out, I would not have even a moment’s hesitation in calling her in sick as and when necessary. And lying to their faces if they ask if she was really sick. They deserve no better for putting you through this.
My d attended a highly regarded west coast performing arts school through sophomore year until it conflicted with her professional performing obligations. After that she went to a public school. Although this has been discussed in great detail, they had ZERO clue regarding her application process. Nevertheless the were completely understanding of her audition schedule after I threatened legal action. You see I helped them understand that allowing football players recruiting trips was identical to the audition process. They understood that allowing the male football players, baseball player and wrestlers and not the female singer to miss school for school visits may be at the very least mysogynistic and at the most discriminatory. They acquiesced. I fought for what was important and stand by my tactics