<p>Mmmmm beer. Looking for a coed dormmate are we?</p>
<p>All the fat desperate chicks and nerdy guys will jump on this. </p>
<p>Nasty fat hippy/scene UCB girls = ew.</p>
<p>I’ll take my chances at the Village at UCSD next fall.</p>
<p>I anticipate and respect your disagreement with my opinion, but I actually this is a terrible idea that can be a hindrance to our college lives and experience. </p>
<p>I won’t write a whole exposition, but here are two reasons:</p>
<p>-“Personal space” is crucial for your well-being, especially for college students who are arguably more easily prone to stress than others. This personal space is essential regardless of how outgoing or social you are. Guys and girls, no matter how close or similar their personalities may be, function differently and in ways that can potentially complicate things for the other gender (e.g. menstruation - Do some imagining and then tell me how many guys could stand a weeks’ worth of mood swings by their female roommate, and then do the same after putting PMS into the picture. Guys/girls also usually place different emphases on sanitation, personal hygiene, and organization, which I imagine can cause nuisances every day.)</p>
<p>-I assume that many of these co-ed roommates might have a romantic interest in each other, and may be even considering someday marrying each other. But we have to realize that cohabitation (living and being active with your significant other before marriage) is a large factor for the decrease in marital satisfaction experienced by many couples today. Divorce very often ensues from this lack of fulfillment, and as you may know, it has only been surging as of late. </p>
<p>The point is, living with someone in the same confined space is radically different from spending time with that person in person. Living with that person can instigate all sorts of complications for the relationship/friendship with each other…</p>
<p>Guys and girls are better off living in separate rooms (separate dorms is another issue), for their own mental health and social fulfillment. I think that college is better experienced this way, and I’m honestly saddened to see more colleges evolving into this…</p>
<p>I was raised by women, so I have a lot of experience living with them, yet I’ve lived with 2 other than family and both situations ended miserably.</p>
<p>Sex almost inevitably happens. Though, I think coed dorms are great for GLBT’s.</p>
<p>But imagine all the hilarious misunderstandings that would take place! It would be just like Three’s Company!!</p>
<p>Baha. And an RA takes the role of Mr. Roper. Perfect.</p>
<p>Right on, EmpathyInAnarchy. And this isn’t meant to be a stab at those reading this who aren’t virgins, but that “inevitable sex” will be so much more fulfilling if saved for marriage, which is the best time to begin living with each other under the same roof.</p>
<p>Don’t get your fantasies up. </p>
<p>Males are much more likely to sign up for this than females. Any attractive female 75%+ comes attached with a boyfriend so if you enjoy listening to your roommate get it on which your not a part of then ya. Sounds good on paper but horrible in practice.</p>
<p>@Oliver_twist maybe i’m jaded but i think the whole Virginity and saving for marriage thing ended in the 80’s. Also College is the best time to figure out if you can stand living with the girl. It makes alot of sense. </p>
<p>If you can’t stand living together then there no point in trying to make it happen. You devote years of your time and emotional attachment to a female only to find out you can’t stand living together? thats a horrible idea.</p>
<p>Who honestly would marry a girl, they haven’t lived together with first. It would be a horrible circumstance if one of you didn’t clean or cook or etc. How do you divy up the chores and housework. Shopping and bills. Nowadays it’s not a matter of just letting the females handle all the housework it’s more balanced and if you believe otherwise then you are in for a rude awakening</p>
<p>“But we have to realize that cohabitation (living with your significant other before marriage) is a large factor for the decrease in marital satisfaction experienced by many couples today. Divorce very often ensues from this lack of fulfillment, and as you may know, the rates have been surging as of late.”</p>
<p>@ Oliver: I often agree with you on alot of things on these boards, but I’m not sure about your statement above. Are you sure cohabituation leads to a higher rate of divorce? I could have sworn I read studies indicating the opposite. I haven’t read up on this in a while, so I could be wrong, but I remember being under the impression that cohabituation leads to a greater sense of sexual compatibility, sexual fulfillment, and a broader understanding of the partner’s habits, lifestyle, values, etc.</p>
<p>Even if I’m wrong, and if you could maybe find me an article, I’d really appreciate it, I still would have a tough time acquiescing when I can’t feasibly see any more than a correlational study verifying this sort of thing. </p>
<p>Again, you could definitely be right. My bad if I’m way off and not up to date with these matters, but I would think that cohabituating would only prepare you better for marriage and living together. Just my thoughts :p.</p>
<p>“And this isn’t meant to be a stab at those reading this who aren’t virgins, but that “inevitable sex” will be so much more fulfilling if saved for marriage, which is the best time to begin living with each other under the same roof.”</p>
<p>Ya know, I would have to really agree here. Sex with girls can be great, but I’ve found that moving too quickly always leads to a terrible break-up. I’m still getting over my ex lol after like 9 months. Anyway, I’m not religious, so the sacrament of marriage doesn’t hold much bearing for me when I’m deciding on things, but I definitely get where you’re coming from. </p>
<p>I would agree that it’s important to really get to the know the person and feel deeply for them and vice versa before getting fully physical. Otherwise, imo, the relationship just won’t work out. :/</p>
<p>@ emilsinclair9: LOL, no worries man. I totally understand your point of view on cohabitation. I actually once shared yours–until I learned about the truths. </p>
<p>I too appreciate your discussion posts on these boards–you’ve been invaluable to people (especially me). I must say that I’m still feeling anxious about UCSD lol; are you SURE you think I’ll get in with no TAG?! 
The wait is killing me. </p>
<p>Here’s two articles I found for you that may be convincing: [Cohabitation[/url</a>], [url=<a href=“http://www.buzzle.com/articles/cohabiting-good-bad.html]Premarital”>http://www.buzzle.com/articles/cohabiting-good-bad.html]Premarital</a> Cohabitation - Cohabiting: the Good and the Bad](<a href=“http://www.civitas.org.uk/hwu/cohabitation.php]Cohabitation[/url”>http://www.civitas.org.uk/hwu/cohabitation.php)</p>
<p>Edit after seeing your next post: I definitely agree with you on how the pace in a relationship to be a steady one. Sorry to hear about your break-up, dude; that’s really rough - I sincerely hope you fully get over that before you begin your Fall semester (at UCB, hopefully)!</p>
<p>I’mma call it a night, sleep well my friend.</p>
<p>Why refer to statistical data when the world of the sitcom has attacked this controversial issue a countless number of times? I mean just turn to the case study of Rachel and Joey in one of the later seasons of Friends. Or even better, try Mork and Mindy.</p>
<p>@ Oliver: You’re the man lol! So many people on here will just jump into conflict to prove their point. I’m glad you can examine both sides and make the choice that’s best for you. I’m still in the process of doing the same. That is, I’m trying to figure out how to best handle relationships. I’ve had amazing ones, but all have ended really painfully…at least for me. I’m glad that you have the fortitude to abstain. I wish I could say the same for myself, but I’m not sure as of now.</p>
<p>Wow! Your first article was enough for me. I didn’t look for sources or methodology or anything to verify the claims, but assuming they’re all true, that’s really fascinating. </p>
<p>When I was thinking of cohabituation, I neglected to think about children and the affect cohabituation can have on them. As a Psych major, I totally understand what the article was saying. </p>
<p>However, for those who are planning on getting married (I think that was the subgroup that I was only really thinking about), I think cohabituation can be beneficial. I mean it would allow both partners to get a sense of what living together (potentially for the rest of their lives) could be like. </p>
<p>I can definitely see it has positives/drawbacks, and I’ll most definitely have to consider the matter further before making any judgments on it. Thank you again for the citings and informing me!</p>
<p>@ Mantis:</p>
<p>Because some of us find statistics more plausible than entertainment on television =P</p>
<p>OOOH and yeah, if you have above a 3.0 for UCSD, you should be fine! I don’t remember specifics from when I chanced you, but last year everyone 3.0+ got in. You should be fine man, don’t even sweat it.</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>You’re definitely right in wanting to think that way. It is good practice in SOME aspects, but not the most important ones such as real honesty and genuineness. In reality, (and you may have experienced this yourself) couples when they are dating are relatively superficial and primarily concerned with pleasing and impressing each other. I mean, did you realize any disingenuousness with your past ex’s? Did she cover up her flaws at times until, as the relationship progressed, they began to be noticeable and you saw right through them? Since co-habitating occurs when you’re only dating and not married, you naturally feel less of an incentive to reveal your true and honest self with the other person. (Not sure if this is a psychological concept, but if it is, you probably might be able to relate to it =])
But when you’re finally married and living in the same house/apartment with that person, that’s when both partners’ flaws and true inner-selves are revealed, and honestly that’s when the relationship can grow into purity. You both will have the motivation for this. Yes, it may not be AS enjoyable as the previous phase, but it is SO much more pure and refreshing, and then the real enjoyment comes. I’ve been told this by my “mentor” who got married 4 years ago (he’s 33 and has a VERY fulfilling life and wife. Haha, that rhymed.) </p>
<p>I’m not sure if the above made sense lol, I hope it did. I just took a peak at the articles and they seem to touch on it a little bit, but I didn’t read them in full length. </p>
<p>Oh, about UCSD: yes I am in that category, but I too like you scanned last years’ UCSD thread and couldn’t find any one with stats LOWER than 3.2 lol. That’s the reason for my doubt. Oh well, you have reassured me nevertheless with the “anyone over 3.0 is admitted.”</p>
<p>Nighty night, sir, and thank you so much again!</p>