<p>Ditto on the wow factor! We stopped after the first set of twins, not willing to take the chance of having two more the next time around.</p>
<p>And you have time to post on a discussion board. I am majorly impressed.</p>
<p>was it hard starting over again when your other kids were almost grown?</p>
<p>Dad of twins here. One a soph at a west coast LAC; the other a freshman at an east coast LAC. Not a single problem, and both could not be any happier with their choices.</p>
<p>I have to say that after the birth of our twins I thought we would have more, but something strange happened to me. Before my girls were born I miscarried one time. Before and after that miscarriage I mentally and physically ached for a child. I would hold all of my friends babies for hours on end. After my girls were born that feeling and ache was gone. At first I thought it was because I was sleep deprived and that it would return after a good night's sleep...but no. I simply had no desire whatsoever to have any more children. And there have been many days in the last 17 years that I was soooo glad that the girls were my only 2! I love them dearly but twins certainly come with many challenges as do all children I suppose.</p>
<p>We just put the kids to bed from trick or treating. My four year old was a bee, and one twin was a clownfish (like Nemo) and one was a dog from Blue's Clues.</p>
<p>I'll try to respond to all your posts. Warning: this might be a bit lengthy.</p>
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I was always sure I'd have at least 4. I have 3. 16y/o ID twin girls and a 12 y/o son. However I am not really very good at being pregnant or carrying babies to term so we stopped.
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<p>We always knew we wanted a (very) large family. Right when we got married, we built a 6-bedroom house. However, we never had a set number of children that we wanted. My wife and I never had any problems having children (obviously). We are basically the exact opposite of an infertile couple. We had a baby every year, no problem. We were very lucky.</p>
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We stopped after the first set of twins, not willing to take the chance of having two more the next time around.
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<p>We also stopped after our first set of twins. We thought they were identical (we didn't realize they were fraternal until they were toddlers), which is of course a spontaneous event, so we weren't really afraid of having another set. But things were pretty crazy with our kids: they were approximately 8, 7, 6, 5, 3, 2, 1, and newborn twins. Also, the bedrooms worked out perfectly. We have a six bedroom house; so we had our three sons in the largest room, the two oldest girls in another room, the two middle girls in another room, and the twins, the youngest girls, in another room. Then my wife and I had a room and we had a room for a playroom. So we decided that 9 was perfect, and that 1991 and on would be baby-free years.</p>
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was it hard starting over again when your other kids were almost grown?
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<p>Actually, not really. After our children started going off to college, we missed them (empty nest syndrome). Our oldest son left in 1999, and then one left each year after that. We started talking about another baby around then. But we knew it would be difficult to start over, so we tried to simply wait for grandchildren. We held off until 2002, but then we really wanted a baby, and our daughter was born. We were ecstatic. We then wanted another baby because we didn't want her to grow up all by herself and be the odd one out in the family. And then we got another set of twins. So we are now done for sure. Twelve kids is final.</p>
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Before my girls were born I miscarried one time. Before and after that miscarriage I mentally and physically ached for a child.
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<p>That must be so devastating; I can't imagine. We were very fortunate to have never miscarried (that we know of). I am sure your twins are great kids and that you are very blessed.</p>
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I simply had no desire whatsoever to have any more children.
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<p>That has never happened to me. :p.</p>
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And you have time to post on a discussion board. I am majorly impressed.
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<p>Thanks. But I really don't deserve any credit. Right now, my life is pretty easy, because the caregivers outnumber the children. Most of our kids are grown, and we only have five kids left at home. Also, included in those children are my 17 year old twins. They are done being raised, and they love playing with their sisters and taking care of them. We always said that we were done having babies, so the twins felt left out because they never got to be anyone's older sister. Now they love the kids and they are a real help. So, for once, we outnumber the children 4 to 3. We have enough adults to take care of the kids and run errands and everything, without too much trouble at all.</p>
<p>DadOfTwelve, thanks for the bedtime story last night. What a loving family! I'm sure you'll find plenty of replies in this new day. I'm just an aunt to twins.</p>
<p>I loved reading your story, and will return the warmth by retelling a very happy one about wide numbers of years between the older and younger halves of a family. In my H's family there's 18 years between the oldest and youngest of 5 boys (no twins). The gap was due to many miscarriages and my MIL/FIL's great desire for children nonetheless. So there were kids whenever my MIL could manage to bring one to term. So between some boys are 6 year gaps, while others are close like small steps (ages 40, 42, 43..). </p>
<p>Long time back, when that youngest began Kindergarten, my MIL got a concerned call from a young teacher that his first-day family picture showed a happy clan of Mom, Dad, the 4 brothers holding hands, himself center stage...and then isolated way off in the corner was one more boy, just face in a black box, as if in jail. The nice teacher was concerned about her new student's family perception, so phoned my MIL, who said, "I don't know why he drew us all that way. Why don't you ask him?" Next day, teacher phoned back my MIL, laughing. "Your son told me, 'Oh, thats my big brother Rxx; he's in...[pause to go pie-eyed with admiration]... COLLEGE.'" His first visit to a college senior's dorm room evidently impressed Kindergarten boy. </p>
<p>Enjoyable dimensions of this large age difference between the 5 brothers continue to manifest themselves into the next generation. Every brother had kids, and two are also grandparents by now. As preteens, my youngest S was sitting with an age-mate cousin (grandson for this oldest brother). Technically they are "first cousins, once removed" but we call everyone just "cousins."
I know that they're both born in the same calendar year, just weeks apart, but they didn't know each other all that well, being from different cities. They began to play a board game, trying to figure out in a machismo kind of way, who was older and who younger, to roll the dice first. I heard my S ask, "I KNOW you're older, but how much older?" The other replied, "A generation." So that settled that.</p>
<p>Just as twxtwinmom did, I have pasted my post from the service academy parents' board. This one has a lot more action.</p>
<p>My fraternal girls have been so different since before birth. (Yes, I could tell.) They have had different interests ever since they had interests. Different sports, different clubs, different friends, and even different middle schools. They have several friends in common. Those tend to be the friends that go way back to pre-school or a former neighborhood.</p>
<p>Twin A likes to shop, watch decorating shows, arrange flowers, swim and play water polo, and do art projects to relax. She can't stand watching any college or professional sports. Twin B hates to shop (just pick it up for me, Mom), watches martial arts movies, science fiction, and Alias, and train for any sport not in the water. Appreciates art - hates the projects. Loves the Cubs, Bears, and Bulls. It's really hysterical.</p>
<p>In the meantime, they love each other dearly. They have both said that they are completely at ease and more their true selves with each other than with anyone else. When together, they share some common interests. Those include Princess Bride (they can recite the entire movie), Chipotle, not walking the dog, and Crash Bandicoot (they may have moved on to another game by now). They are also both very close with their younger brother.</p>
<p>I personally think it will be harder on you moms to send 2 kids off to college at the same time than it will be for them. Mine miss each other but write on each other's facebook wall a lot. Twin A is in Europe for a year of architectural study abroad so they don't get to talk much. They just deal with it. It makes their time home that much better.</p>
<p>In terms of other children, my husband and I often joke that we had our first good day when the girls were just over 2 years old. (They were very premature.) We thought it would be great to have another baby. (It's amazing how quickly you can forget 2 tough years when you have a great day.) Thank goodness, because we have our son who is a senior in high school now.</p>
<p>DadofTwelve, you're an inspiration. I can't help but imagine you as Henry Fonda in "Yours, Mine and Ours".</p>
<p>Fascinating thread. Don't have twins here, but know a few families who do. I "only" have four children and sometimes people express amazement at that, to which I reply "Well, I had them one at a time." It's not like I had quads or sets of twins or something!</p>
<p>About birth order--I can see why it would make a difference if there is a year or more between the children. Older one is treated differently, and made to feel more responsible. Younger one gets away with more because they're "younger."</p>
<p>But I don't see how the birth order of twins can matter! There are probably as many anecdotes of the older one being the leader as there are of the younger one being the leader. And anecdotal evidence doesn't prove anything. A lot depends on the personality they are born with.</p>
<p>And depending on the day, the leader may very well shift to the other twin.</p>
<p>momoftwins my girls do the same thing! Almost from birth, just about the time I thought I had them figured out they seemed to exchange personalities. As they got older the "switching" seemed to slow but it still happens. It is more subtle now but it still keeps me hopping.</p>
<p>My twins grew up with the same personalities that they had in utero. Yes, I could tell too.</p>
<p>I knew I couldn't be the only one. It's funny, but my husband says that the greater bond is not between any twins, but between mothers of twins. We seem to gravitate towards each other. There is a shared experience that is so easy to relate to. And I have to admit that I start talking to any mom pushing a double stroller with twins in it.</p>
<p>You are so right. And I do the same. I feel compelled to talk to anyone pushing a double stroller - once I have confirmed in my mind that the occupants are about the same size!</p>
<p>I'm a twin, but my mom didn't really get into being a "mom of twins," --probably because we were her 3rd and 4th children and she quickly had three more after that. I remember making the decision to attend a different college from my twin. I was the "dependent" one and needed to get out of my sister's shadow. Good for both of us, I think. Actually, we have never been very close since we started high school. </p>
<p>Dad of 12: I salute you. You've got me beat. (Mom of 8--no twins, so far). </p>
<p>My bro's s-i-l (if you can follow that) is expecting her 10th--and she already has 3 sets of twins and 3 singletons! I think the oldest child is 7 or 8. They are the best-behaved kids. I only wish my kids (who are all 2-3 years apart) were so good.</p>
<p>I am tired just thinking about her. Not to mention all the college visits and applications in that family's future!</p>
<p>"Our older twins recently watched the video of their birth, and I believe that is the first time they even knew who came out first. It just never mattered to us. Do you guys use terms like "oldest" and "youngest" to classify your twins?"</p>
<p>Mother of boy/girl twins here, 2 hours apart. They do know who is older, but it's only talked about in a joking manner, never as a serious descriptor. </p>
<p>"Also, the issue of dressing identically can be pretty controversial among parents of twins. What did you do with your twins?"</p>
<p>I dressed them in coordinating clothes til they were 3, just because it was so darn cute - but after that, nope.</p>
<p>It's amazing how many people still ask them if they are identical, and don't accept the answer that they're not. Even adults!</p>
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<p>i would have hated to be your babysitter, lol. have you ever seen the duggar family on tv?</p>
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<p>the same thing happened in my family. my mom and dad are both the youngest sibling in their respective families, and they each have siblings about 15 years older than they are. to compound that, they didnt have me until they were about 50 and 40. so even though i am only 17, i have first cousins that are over 60. and then my cousins have children and grandchildren who are my first cousins once and twice removed. it gets confusing.</p>
<p>i have a question: what about naming your twins? did any of you use rhyming or coordinating names? like "jacob and joshua" or "faith and hope" or anything like that?</p>
<p>Nope! Mine start with different letters and no rhyming!</p>
<p>I'm an identical twin. Our names are Bethany and Destany. We were born 3 months and 4 days early weighing 2 pounds 1 once and 2 pounds 7 ounces. I was 14 inches, she was 14.5 inches. We are 45 seconds apart due to an emergency C-section. We will be 18 December 3rd.</p>
<p>My mom has cried at every holiday this past year. She was hysterical our first day of Senior year. If you mention college right now, she will cry.</p>
<p>Part of that I'm guessing is because she sacrificed a ton to raise us girls...she was a single mom for awhile. We are best friends....so its hard on all 3 of us.</p>
<p>We will be attending the same college in June. I am a declared Biology major (i want to teach high school) and Destany is a declared Nursing major. We will be sharing a room.</p>
<p>We dressed alike until the end of 8th grade. No one could tell us apart. After that we corrdinated for about 6 months and now dress totally different. She has long hair, I prefer short hair.</p>
<p>As kids, and even now, we tend to alienate friends because really all we need is each other.</p>
<p>But mom has had a hard time coming to terms with us leaving home in June for about a year. She has an older son (25) but sees him maybe once every 3-4 months.</p>
<p>We will be 50 minutes away...and I'm sure we will come home twice a month or so.</p>
<p>"have a question: what about naming your twins? did any of you use rhyming or coordinating names? like "jacob and joshua" or "faith and hope" or anything like that?"</p>
<p>Oh, no way, no how. Different first initials and the names aren't names that are a matching pair. Too cutesy for my taste, and it won't age well.</p>