My best friend has a 2310 on his SAT and won various writing competitions and passed AP Calculus AB in his sophomore year. He has been an incredibly good student in the past years, distinguishing himself among those around him.
However, in the past year, he hasn’t done any homework, hasn’t attended most of his classes, and hasn’t spoken to myself or any of his other friends.
Ultimately, due to this one year, he may end up with a 2.8-3.0 unweighted cumulative GPA. He will be retaking a few courses his senior year as a result of what happened this year.
Overall, he just seems sad and is distancing himself from everyone around him. I know that highschool grades aren’t everything, but I don’t want him to feel like he’s all alone or to damage his college or career prospects (he may not graduate because he is failing so many classes) Can I have some advice on how to help my friend out? I don’t want for this one bad year to completely mess him up. Hopefully, he’ll be able to get everything together his senior year Which colleges out there could he possibly look to?
To be frank, many of the top schools (including ivies) that he once had a chance at are pretty much virtually impossible to get into now. Not only are they looking for stellar GPAs but also upward trends - they do not want to see you getting weaker and weaker before even stepping foot into their doors. However, I believe if he were to suddenly have a change of heart and step up his GPA again. He might be able to use this step back as a potential essay topic to show personal growth. If that were to happen, he might have a chance at 2nd tier schools such as NYU, Boston College, etc.
It doesn’t sound like grades are the issue, they sound more like a symptom.
While I’m certainly no expert, it sounds to me like depression.
Why don’t you make an appointment today with his guidance counselor? Tell her that you’re worried, and fill her in on the changes in your friend’s behavior. Sad and alone and distancing himself from everyone around him is NOT typical behavior for a healthy 16 year old. His guidance counselor may be unaware of the trend, as may be your friend’s parents.
Speak to his guidance counselor, while knowing it may effect your friendship. But it may get your friend some help that he seems to need.
I also would be afraid that he has fallen in with the wrong crowd and may have gotten involved with drugs. Is this a possibility? Or is something possibly going on in his home life (sick parent?) that is affecting his ability to attend class or socialize? Either way I think he needs adult intervention. The school administration should be made aware of this if they aren’t yet. I think right now college admissions is the least of his problems. He needs to get his life back under control.
This isn’t your battle. If you’re concerned, reach out to him and let him know that you’re there for him and if he needs anything beyond your reach, you would be willing to help him find someone who can assist him. But I wouldn’t go behind his back to an adult, especially seeing that if he is with the wrong crowd, you could end up being a snitch and getting him in trouble.
I would like to disagree, very strongly, with CaliCash.
He sounds like he needs help, though he may not realize it.
“Being a snitch” or “going behind his back” is not what this is about-- he hasn’t broken any laws. He’s not his old self, and that’s frequently a sign of a problem.
Speak to his guidance counselor. Take the steps to get him the help he needs, NOW, before summer puts that help out of reach.
Thanks for the help guys! Just to clarify, he’s definitely not using drugs or involved with a bad crowd. We’ve already talked to his high school counselor, but it hasn’t helped all that much
Are you going on any college tours? Can he go with you and listen to the admin officer give the lecture on keeping your grades up, how to apply, special programs he might be interested in?
Which colleges out there could he possibly look to?