My "Jersey Girl" Daughter Thinking About Ole Miss

First time poster here and I know there are already a lot of threads similar to this topic and I have read them all but here goes anyway. Any advice will be very much appreciated.

Our daughter is a sophomore and is the oldest of our three daughters. We are from NJ about 45 miles due west of NYC and live in a very affluent area although by comparative standards to many, if not most people, around here we are not. We cannot afford to send all three of our daughters to out of state colleges and the best in state school here (besides Princeton of course) is Rutgers which she is not interested in although it is an excellent university academically.

We have suggested to her Ole Miss because the out of state tuition rate is much cheaper than most schools and she may qualify for some scholarship money based on her good high school academic performance, she has a 3.5 to 3.6 overall GPA with some honors classes in a top rated public high school. She has not yet taken the SATs but did well on the PSATs.

I was born in Mobile, AL and both of my parents (her grandparents) were born and raised in Alabama. My father was transferred by International Paper to NYC from Mobile when I was two months old 50 plus years ago and we have been here in the NYC suburbs ever since. My father went to Ole Miss on a basketball scholarship in the 50’s and his Ole Miss degree served him extremely well. When he retired from IP, he was a senior executive running three major divisions. After retirement from IP, he was the CFO of a tech firm in Princeton and later sat on their board of directors for many years, all with his BS degree in Accounting from Ole Miss and nothing more other than hard work, determination, and very strong southern morals. We have lots of relatives in south Alabama and we vacation there most years in Gulf Shores where my parents have owned a place since 1979. I mention all of this to tell the story of our southern ties, and ties to Ole Miss.

Our daughter, who WE (not necessarily her) are thinking about Ole Miss for, has spent a fair amount of time over the years in the south and loves it but she is a born and raised Jersey girl and would probably choose NYU over Ole Miss if that were an option. She is a very attractive, friendly, polite, kind and courteous girl by all accounts but is not preppy at all and definitely not the stand outside the sorority house clapping her hands and singing sorority songs type of girls at all which is our biggest concern. She does not look down on that type of thing at all, she just isn’t that type. She is somewhat introverted and somewhat of a loner type although she is very social just preferring smaller more intimate groups. She is very accepting of others but is concerned that others there my not be accepting of her, especially if she is not in a sorority. If anyone has any thoughts on this at all it will be greatly appreciated. We will be visiting Ole Miss and Alabama in June of this year.

Thanks very much from a concerned Dad!

I am a big believer in informed decisions. I think it would be best for your family if you visit campus with your daughter to comprehend campus life firsthand. Be sure to come prepared with proper questions that voice your concerns (i.e. ask about Greek life). Niche.com is also a great resource that discusses certain aspects of hundreds of institutions – one of which is Greek life. It’s free to register. Niche is such a handy tool because it consigns grades for each institution on each topic, which is an average of user ratings. It’s the like the Amazon for colleges. Good luck!

You can see on the Ole Miss website what level scholarships they offer OOS students for certain grades and test scores, same with UA.

I am not very familiar with Ole Miss by any means but I do have a cousin of a cousin from California who attended and still lives there who really enjoyed it and was not a sorority person. I think students do tend to think that large student bodies are monolithic when they are not.The Alabama forum here is very active, check it out, there are an enormous amount of OOS students at Alabama.

It is too bad that student turn their nose up at instate schools because they actually know people who will go, or people with not as good grades as they are actually allowed to go, and they want to go to somewhere where someone else’s worse students go. I would tend to offer a semester abroad if they do end up staying instate.

Also please check the financial aid forums pinned posts for low cost OOS schools and automatic scholarships:
http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/financial-aid-scholarships/1678964-links-to-popular-threads-on-scholarships-and-lower-cost-colleges.html

I would sign her up for the ACT/SAT now so that you have some scores before making a trip this summer.

visiting campuses in the summer has its negatives. It can be like house-hunting and looking at empty homes. It can be harder to envision what they’d be like during the school year.

If you must visit during the summer, avoid weekend campus visits. Yes, the tours will be offered, but the schools will not have faculty for you to meet related to your D’s likely major.

What will your D’s major be?

Southern schools do have sororities and they are popular. I don’t know a lot about Ole Miss’ Greek system but I do know about Bama’s. Bama has a LOT of sororities and each has its own culture. Some houses are more preppy, and some are more “casual”. Your D might find that a Greek house there would fit…or not.

many girls don’t pledge, so it’s not necessary. However, depending on your D’s major, pledging may be more desirable. STEM majors are less likely to pledge. Business and Communications majors (or similar) are more likely to pledge (at both schools).

When you visit Bama in the summer, try to do so during a Bama Bound orientation time because there will be incoming freshman on campus. Here are the BB dates: http://orientation.ua.edu/dates/

Also, go to the Bama forum here on CC…it’s very popular with lots of info:
http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/university-alabama/

There are a lot of NJ kids at Bama.

Once your D has test scores, you will know which schools will be more affordable. The OOS cost is irrelevant if a “more expensive” school offers merit that takes the OOS cost away.

How much do you want YOUR net cost to be?

Our S is looking at Ole Miss as well. He was born in New York and raised inside the DC Beltway. GPA not what it could be; will keep him from getting scholarships at the big name schools. He did extremely well on the PSAT, and will almost certainly be a NMSF (but his grades will probably keep him from being a finalist). The initial draw was the money Ole Miss offers semifinalists, but he wants to minor in film studies in addition to a math major. That’s available, along with a yearly film festival. We’ll most likely visit during the summer, since getting away during the school year would be harder to swing.I grew up in Tennessee and went to UT for grad school; my wife grew up in the Baltimore-DC area and went to Florida State. Our son probably wouldn’t dream of joining a fraternity; he’s a self-professed “nerd”. I think he could find his niche at any large university, and I think he’s looking forward to seeing what Oxford is like. If he likes it, college will be much less expensive for him. If not, he’ll find somewhere else.

If it turns out that she is more of a New York kind of kid than an Ole Miss-Bama sort, have you considered a school such as SUNY Binghamton or SUNY Stony Brook? For out-of-state students they are not much more expensive than Rutgers – or Ole Miss.

I live in NJ and Rutgers offers no value. I would take your daughter to Lehigh, Lafayatte, Muhlenberg, Gettysburg, Bucknell, Villanova , Dickinson and Penn State to see the reaction. She is way over qualified for Ole Miss. You will be quite surprised how much money is available at the private schools.

Penn State will be full pay for the OP’s D.

@ Erin’s Dad quite possibly but seeing a northern state school that is more in line with the kid’s talent is never a bad idea and it isn’t very far.

I agree that the SUNYs are definitely worth a look. Binghamton, Geneseo, New Paltz. Does she have any idea what she wants to study?

OP, taking Lafayette as an example, 60% of kids receive aid averaging 40k a year. Don’t make the mistake many parents do by dismissing the private schools without careful analysis of the true net cost.

I would run some net price calculators on some of the schools’ websites before traveling all over.
Bucknell and similar schools offer need-based aid, but not sure of the requirements for merit aid.

Definitely check out the southern schools to see if she likes them.

Makes sense to consider southern schools specially as there is family nearby.

Bucknell gives an average of 30k a year to 60% of students. St. Lawrence gives about 41k to about 65% of students. This is need based but you would be surprised what the income thresholds are.

Thank you all for the excellent feedback.

To answer some of the questions asked, she would like to be a Physical Therapist. She has mentioned Penn State quite a bit and I think she would love it there but PSU is over $40K per year for OSS and then there is another 2 to 3 more years required to become a PT either there or somewhere else. $160K for undergraduate plus another $50-80K more for graduate school is simply not an option, especially with two more daughters right behind her. We haven’t (yet) considered the excellent nearby private schools like Lehigh, Lafayatte, Muhlenberg, Gettysburg, Bucknell, Villanova , etc., simply because we just assumed that they would be more cost prohibitive than Penn State but will definitely look into them abased on the comments received here. We would not qualify for any need based scholarships so it would all have to be merit based. We are very new to this whole process and haven’t really even scratched the surface yet but we are encouraged to see that she may have some out of state options like Ole Miss and/or UA if she still really doesn’t want to go to Rutgers which she is very adamant about now…although she hasn’t even seen it yet. We will be taking her there before we go see the southern schools which I think is going to make her like the southern schools that much more, Rutgers unfortunately does not have the nicest looking campus especially compared to Ole Miss and UA.

Unfortunately, visiting the southern schools during the school year is just not possible for us but maybe next Fall we will go again during the school year if she decides that she really likes one of them.

As a side note, I was amazed to see that 4 graduating seniors from her high school last year were UA bound and there is another girl in our neighborhood that is a Sr there. I’m assuming this has a lot to do with the scholarship money offered there but don’t know for sure.

Thank you all again and if there are any other thoughts or suggestions, they will be much appreciated!

If she’s a NMSF Ole Miss pays tuition and room. If she likes it there, that would be hard to turn down. If our kids don’t like it, a free ride would be no bargain. Even if aid gets the tuition at the private colleges down to 15-20K per year that’s a big outlay for many of us.

Yes, what is her PSAT score exactly?

OP, the amount of need based aid is related to your income and the cost of the school, not just your income. You would be surprised what comes out of those calculators. Unless you run through the calculators saying you don’t qualify is just speculation. Families earning 200k a year get substantial financial aid.

My parents were from the south and my dad went to Mississippi State. They moved to NJ where I was born.
I spent summers in the south and i knew it wasn’t for me. The pace of life is slower compared to the Northeast.
I ended up going to Case Western (electrical engineering) and even that part of the midwest wasn’t for me.

Has she considered TCNJ for a public NJ school? It is very good and has a nice campus.

Also try the super match tool over on the left side, and check the box “I’m interested in schools where I would be well above average, to increase my financial aid opportunities”

SUNY Binghamton is a great value for out of state students.

So she should spend some time visiting in the south to make sure that a southern school is a good fit for her.

Depending on her major, U Mississippi would be perfectly fine and event excellent depending on the department. If she’s an aspiring engineer I would look at Mississippi State U, however. MSU has a reputation of being a bit more “proletarian” than UM, of which they are quite proud. LOL.

Your biggest hurdle may be cultural. UM and MSU students generally love their schools but life at a southern public campus is not for every fresh-faced northerner. Most likely she will find intellectual peers and friends wherever she attends college, but again the social comfort and fit is very important.

You’re a bit early in the process but I would toss some other southern schools in the mix that possibly would offer generous financial aid;

U of South Carolina
Clemson U
Belmont Abbey College
Guilford College
Vanderbilt U
Wofford College
Furman University