My parents don't want me to go to CC first

I was relatively in good standing in high school. Top 9% in my class, took lots of advance courses. However, I didn’t get into the colleges I truly wanted to go to. I accepted my SIR to SLO and I am regretting it. I was waitlisted to Davis and then rejected, which has been my dream school for so long. It put me into extreme depression because I felt so disappointed in myself. It got to the point where I had to see a therapist because of the stress.

I really want to go to community college to transfer to a UC, but my parents are afraid that I’ll face rejection again and end up in a bad place all over again. They really don’t care about how much we’d be saving. I don’t know how to talk to them because every time I try, they just say they know what is best for me.

I’d like to hear if any transfer students had the same situation, or any recommendations of how to convince my parents to let me make my own choice in this.

I was in this position. No amount of convincing could get my parents to go the CC route so I gave up and enrolled at a CSU. But in my sophomore year I decided to try to transfer, went to CC for a year to get prereqs done because I wanted to change my major, and now I’ll be at Davis in the fall.

That is to say that your Davis dreams are not dead. Get a High GPA, complete all your major prereqs for Davis found on assist.org, get 60+ (lower division) units, and you have a very good chance.

If you go to any CCC with a TAG to UCD, you’ll be guaranteed admission to there, assuming you maintain the required GPA and meet all other requisites. I think it’s a good idea. You shouldn’t have to go to a school that you don’t want to go to (though CPSLO is a good school). The guarantee part is what you can convince your parents of.

Your parents are right , why go to a CC when you got accepted at a good school, if you really want Davis, you can still transfer there from SLO. The choice is yours though, do what feels right for you. If you were my child, I would say go to SLO, get involved, do your best, be positive, and hope for good outcomes. Decisions are hard especially when you feel disappointed, but listen to your parents they know you better than us CC people and if they feel SLO will work for you, maybe give it a good thought. Remember you can succeed in any college if you have the right support and attitude.

If you have your heart set on UCD, I don’t see why doing two years at a CC is bad. It will save your parents some money (vs. camping at a CSU), and, as @ProfessorPlum168 points out, you will be able to get in if you meet all of the requirements. It’s more difficult to match CSU coursework to a UC than a CC is. As of 2016, 93% of UCD transfer students were from California CC’s. Those are not good odds for the CSU-to-UC applicants. I’m sure your parents are worried that 1) a CC won’t be a very exciting answer to, “So, where is your kids going to school next year?”, and 2) you may half-ass CC and never get into a 4-year. Lay out the facts. A lot of kids do what you want to do in order to get into their dream school.

Like your parents, I am concerned about you. You were so set on Davis that you could not get past the disappointment of not getting in. Do you and your therapist feel that you’re in a better place to handle disappointment, now that you’ve been in therapy? If you and your therapist both feel that it’s safe for you to go to a cc and risk being rejected by Davis or any other first choice school again, then I think you have a good argument to make with your parents.

However, if the reality is that you’re not yet ready to handle that type of disappointment, I’d suggest you make plans, and implement them, so that you can better handle that disappointment should it come. Talk to your parents about remaining in therapy while you’re at the cc, or else deferring your admission at SLO for a year so you can remain in therapy (and if it goes well, you go to the cc). Make yourself more resilient to future disappointments like this, so that if Davis doesn’t happen, you’ll be disappointed, yes, but better able to move on. In addition, doing this shows your parents that you understand the severity of the situation, that you are proactively dealing with the risks, and that you’re making yourself ready to take them without endangering your health.

I hate the way these schools play with kids emotions - leading them on with wait lists. You must have a housing deopist down so, abandoning you spot won’t be free.

SLO is an outstanding school, a dream-school for many of it’s applicants. In many ways SLO is better than Davis - class size, learn by doing and location among them. If you go to a CC, there’s no guarantee you’ll make it in this time either - so there’s a fair chance you’d have wasted the detour and still be settling for a school other than Davis. You have been given an opportunity to earn a degree at one the state’s premier colleges and you are willing to risk that for a ‘maybe’, Even if your transfer works out, you will miss out on the freshman dorm and 4 year experience that many people find so formative.

IMHO, you should give SLO a fair shot. If, after a year, you conclude it really isn’t for you, you will be in a better case to make that pitch to your parents. My guess is, you’ll fall in love with the place and never want to leave.

As others have pointed out, CPSLO is not your typical CSU (there is NOTHING wrong with the CSU system…it just doesn’t fit everyone) so don’t feel dejected about settling. I would give it a shot, because now at this point I have no regrets about choosing my CSU. Give it a year as you won’t be able to apply until you’ve reached junior standing anyway.

But you CAN do it!! CSU to UC transfers are low because there’s not a lot of them. Getting into Davis is not guaranteed but you can try when the time comes