So I know the world is really crazy and scary and that other people have real problems right now, but if anyone out there could give me some advice, tips, anything it would mean the world.
During this past semester [I’m a sophomore btw], I have found it really hard to get any work done. It goes beyond procrastination, no matter what I do or lacks thereof, I just can’t seem to get myself to work. Back when I was living on campus I tried to do the things that would help me work in the past go the library and/or a coffee shop play classical music, things like that but I couldn’t focus. The longer this went on the more work I would get and it would begin to pile up.
Whenever I sat down in front of my computer to type an essay the words just can’t seem to get out. It feels like for all my work my brain goes blank. The more my work piles up the more anxious I get about it and I get really frustrated with myself, and I know I should be doing it. I feel like I’m stuck between caring and not caring about my work at the exact same time. And ever since my classes have been moved online its been worse. I don’t check my email, I keep missing assignments getting the due dates wrong. I just missed an exam that I thought would open last night at 7 and be due this morning but I got it completely wrong and missed the entire exam.
I feel horrible when I miss the assignments, but I can’t seem to get myself to do them anymore. Like I lie in bed on my phone or doing something else knowing I have work to do but every time I try to do it or think about it this sense of dread fills my chest.
I wasn’t like this before. Yes, I would struggle with self-discipline and time management but back then I would find a way to get it done.
To give some context I have been going through a lot mentally and in my personal life these past few years but it hadn’t really affected my school works up until this point.
I’ve tried talking to some family members like this and they say I need to sit down in a quiet place with no distractions but I’ve tried that and it doesn’t work. If anything I just end up feeling more frustrated and I would just want to cry. I’ve been working on getting a therapist but even that has been struggle it feels like it takes up so much emotional energy that I just don’t have anymore.
Has anyone else felt like this before? Please tell me I’m not alone…
I don’t know what to do, I don’t know how to explain this to my professors or my family because it feels like an excuse, and I don’t know if they’ll understand. I just can’t seem to get it together no matter how much I want to.
What should I do?