This is my first post on the parent forum. After reading, multiple times, the threads of the colleges my DS has applied to it occurred to me that it would probably be best for me to move myself over here.
Argh! The bittersweet milestones. I am just hoping the best for my son, who we love so much. We homeschooled from the beginning, and graduated him in June. He has applied to UChicago (his first pick,) MIT, Harvard, Amherst, Williams, Rice, Duke, Northwestern and UCBerkeley. He is a bright kid - top 1% of SAT tests and GPA, thoughtful, curious well rounded and has some really great EC’s and special interests. We utilized all kinds of resources in homeschooling him including charters and community college classes (excellent grades.)
Yet with all this going for him, I’m wondering how much his being homeschooled, his gap year, and us being low income will impact his chances. On the one hand I am at peace knowing that what will be, will be. On the other hand I find myself checking and rechecking everything to see if we missed anything in the applications, any deadlines, criteria, financial aid, etc. My son is much more relaxed about it all than I am. I am feeling the nervous jitters and sentimentality of being at this stage with my firstborn. Neither my husband nor myself went to college, so this is all new to us. I go back and forth from thinking no college is good enough for him to thinking we’ll be thrilled beyond words if anyone accepts him.
Thanks to any who have taken the time to read, and I welcome any insight - especially if you’ve been here before. I hope the best for all the dear sons and daughters you’re rooting for.
There are homeschooled students at all of the colleges on your list.
I will say…that is a VERY top heavy list. While he has excellent application credentials per your report, these schools are reaches for just about everyone.
Do you have any other schools on his application list that are sure thing slam dunks?
If you ARE a CA resident…did your son apply to any other UCs?
Hi - thanks for the response. Yes, we are CA - Silicon Valley/Coast area. I do wish DS had been able to get in more safety school applications. He was waitlisted for UChicago last year, and really wanted to focus on his ED application with them this year so he didn’t have a lot of extra energy for applying to other schools that weren’t on the Coalition Application (MIT was the only one that wasn’t.) If he does not wind up being admitted to any of these he will probably either look into remaining colleges with rolling/later admission deadlines or attend our community college for the next two years and apply as a transfer. Or option C of some sort.
Hello doschicos - thanks for responding. I don’t think he has anything really impressive, at least yet, to account for his gap year by admission standards. Even though he has officially graduated as of June he has continued as a devoted student, continuing his own fascination of self-study in biology (his chosen major is neurobiology,) math, computer programming and philosophy with a pretty intense and disciplined drive. Some math/science tutoring, some working with his dad, violin/viola study. He may wind up doing some summer travel/community service work. But nothing really out of the ordinary, and he doesn’t seem especially concerned about it. He just had his 19th birthday, so I’m trying to balance recognizing he is a young man needing to make his own decisions with wanting to double check everything.
thumper1, as of this year UChicago decided to offer two Early Decion rounds. My S applied in EDII and will hear back by 2/15. I’m sure it will all work out one way or another. Either he will get accepted somewhere, or not, and find another way to continue his education. But it’s hard watching from the sidelines sometimes!
Regarding the community college transfer into UC route, I would advise talking to an counselor at your local community college. Some majors are easier than others to transfer into and you might be surprised how difficult it can be depending on what your son intends to study.
It looks like last year he applied to Harvard, Princeton, Chicago and Penn. and did not get accepted to them.
That list was also very top heavy…very.
From what you wrote here, he just applied to more very competitive schools. What was his SAT or ACT score?
I hope it all works out for him this year…but really…given your need for financial,aid…and that this is a gap year, it might have been good to cast a wider net…in other words some schools that are less competitive for admissions.
I am wondering if it’s not too late to apply to some schools.
I know he included Cal, but reports are that even for instate top applicants, Cal is NOT a slam dunk for admissions.
What has changed substantially in the past year that would entice a college who rejected or waitlisted him last year to accept him this year? I know this is a blunt question but it is not too late to look at some other schools to apply to with later deadlines. It doesn’t need to be only super reachy schools or community college - there are plenty of schools in between.
There are RD schools he could apply to now without waiting for rejections. If he waits, more doors close. For example. Dickinson takes RD apps until Feb. 1. They meet 96% of need, too.
Based on other threads, he got shut out last year with an all-reach list, took a gap year, and is applying to an all-reach list again (except maybe UCB, but UCB cannot be counted on as a safety).
Does he have any safeties this year, or is his safety plan to start at a community college and then transfer to a UC?
Thanks for all the feedback. @intparent I’ll mention Dickinson for him to check out - thanks! He may wind up applying to more schools; he knows we support that but it’s ultimately up to him.
@thumper1 his SAT was 2230, +800 in Biology subject test and 760 in Literature. His GPA, weighted with the community college classes is 4.14. His strongest non academic interest is music - beautiful on the viola, violin, piano and tablas. He submitted samples in slideroom on some of his applications, provided link to his soundcloud page on others.
@doschicos I think one thing that changed in the past year is his ability to pull together the college application process better (last year he skidded all his applications in at the last minute and with several errors) and be more sure of himself. Hopefully that came across in his applications this year.
He doesn’t seem to care so strongly about the do or die for college that he is willing to put in too much more effort beyond the 9 applications he gave his best to, which took a lot of energy and time for him because he belabored his essays so much. There might be a couple more that he considers. But his thinking is a decision of where he will be spending the next 4 years of his life and getting his higher education is pretty significant, and he would rather only pursue and commit to that if it is at an institution with a lot of research potential, is need blind and can afford to cover almost all of his tuition.
Otherwise, he’d like to explore non college route options like certification in programming (one of his skills) and freelance work, something entrepreneurial. Who knows. I think if a person is motivated enough to learn and succeed there is more than one way of going about doing that. He has certainly surprised us to date with some of his successful ideas.
I’ll continue to support the idea of his looking into more safety colleges to apply to. After running head down for awhile in the gift/course of motherhood I’m just taking a moment to process this whole thing of kids becoming young adults and having futures ahead of them - hence ‘nervous jitters.’ And I still have 3 more to go after him! (His younger 3 sisters - all in high school.)
It’s great that your son is laid back about the process - perhaps you should take a cue from him and let the chips fall where they may. It’s hard for me to know from your post is to pursue the lottery ticket of admission to highly selective, prestigious schools with community college and the local CSU (San Jose State?) being acceptable as a fall back position… or whether your son really wants to attend a 4-year university but has unrealistic expectations.
When you choose to homeschool you are also choosing a path that puts you at a disadvantage as far as predicting college admissions – there just isn’t a good basis for comparison. No Naviance charts, no high school guidance counselor able to steer the student based on years of past experience with grads of the same high school. Just a kid with a non-standardized profile who may very well be admitted to a top college… but then again may be viewed as unremarkable and just as easily passed over.
Every school on your son’s list sometimes admits homeschoolers, but because every homeschool experience is different, it is hard for you to know what others have presented in their application packages that make them attractive.
So I agree with the others – the list is reach-heavy and it is likely that the results this year will be the same as last, with no college admitting your son. The odds are against just about everyone to start - so with that list, odds are that he won’t get into any. That’s why I say to stop worrying – your son has every right to reach high, but you need to recognize that is what he is doing and not stress about the results.
That being said, schools that may be matches or safeties typically are less generous with need-based financial aid – whereas for a CSU the funds from a Cal Grant and/or Pell Grant might be enough to meet your needs.
If there is another issue at the heart of your anxiety – perhaps a failure to launch issue (that is, maybe your son is still living at home, not employed, and doesn’t seem particularly motivated to change things) – then that is something you will need to confront separately. You have described your family as low-income but your son continuing to explore an array of interests, " may wind up doing some summer travel/community service work". Who finances the travel? Who supports son while he volunteers? You and your husband might need to sit down with him and discuss your expectations and limitations if your son doesn’t get into an affordable college this year.
